


Babysitting My Boss

by givemepizza



Category: SKAM (Norway)
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe - Office, Banter, Boss/Employee Relationship, CEO Even, Executive Assistant Isak, Falling In Love, Fluff, Friendship, Getting Together, Getting to Know Each Other, Grumpy Isak, Happy Ending, Heart-to-Hearts, M/M, Needy Even, Romance, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-08
Updated: 2020-04-01
Packaged: 2021-02-27 19:42:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 64,088
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22611208
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/givemepizza/pseuds/givemepizza
Summary: Isak has the stressful job of executive assistant to CEO Even, and apart from regular admin duties, Isak also doubles as Even's life coach, PA, and occasional friend. While Isak feels that his job description is unfairly broad, Even thinks the arrangement is perfect and this brings about a lot of bickering and teasing. Little do they realize that their relationship has long since crossed the line from professional into personal.cue the obliviousness, banter, butterflies, sexual tension, the couple moments and the teasing from their friends who can totally see what's going on.
Relationships: Eva Kviig Mohn/Jonas Noah Vasquez, Even Bech Næsheim/Isak Valtersen, Magnus Fossbakken/Vilde Lien Hellerud, Yousef Acar/Sana Bakkoush
Comments: 143
Kudos: 238





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone. FINALLY that chaptered story i promised is here and i'm so thankful to you guys for being so patient. I made some more changes, so the story got a little longer and will take a while to complete, so i will update this on Friday or Saturday every week or two max.  
> This story is a slow burn because it takes a while for Evak to realize they have feelings for each other because for the most part they are busy trying to revamp their failing company, and Even is busy annoying Isak.  
> I promise there will be a lot of fluff and romance is we move along. For now, i hope you guys will enjoy this story.

I roll my eyes for the umpteenth time today as my boss calls for me yet again on the desk phone.

Grumbling under My breath, I lazily make my way into my boss’ office without an ounce of enthusiasm or enough curtsey to fake a smile. I’m feeling fucking grumpy because my boss is needy as hell, and I’m going to show it. There is another desk in my boss’ overly spacious office and I work from there sometimes when there is work for him and me to collaborate on. Otherwise my desk is situated just outside my Boss’ because it also works as a waiting and reception area of sorts.

I rap my fingers gently on the CEO’s office door and step inside after the affirmative response from inside. The moment I shut the door, my boss swings round in his chair to face me with a smile. I know this smile. It’s his help-me-with-something-you-might-hate smile. It’s also a smile I often find hard to resist because…well it’s a very nice smile and I guess my boss can’t be blamed for that. 

“I need your help, Isak.” Even Bech Naesheim, CEO of Golden Gates Cosmetics manufacturing Company, says.

“No shock there.” I mutter under my breath as I slowly stride toward Even’s desk.

“Don’t give me that sour look.” Even says. “You are my assistant. That means helper, support figure and good friend.”

“Actually it doesn’t. The friend part is a huge stretch.” I argue back and roll my eyes yet again when I realise Even is no longer listening to me because something on his phone has claimed his attention. He swipes away, gaze intently trained on the device. “What’s the dire emergency?” I ask impatiently, unable to keep the dryness out of my voice, but I only get shushed for it.

This time I fight back the urge to roll my eyes as impossible as that sounds.

Thankfully just as my patience starts to wear thin, Even finally abandons his phone in favour of giving me his full attention. Hands clasped at his desk, he gives me a serious look. “Isak, I need help deciding what hair style I should go with for the meeting with the people from Paris this afternoon.”

I shouldn’t be surprised. Really I shouldn’t. I’ve worked more than a year for this man and it’s not uncommon for him to do shit like interrupt the serious work I have waiting for me in my office to ask for a silly favour like this. Yet still I gape at him in disbelief because there seems to be no limit to how much he can shock me. “Are you kidding me?”

“Of course not. This is a huge deal and a very serious matter. If we play our cards right, this could be the perfect investment company we’ve been waiting for.”

“Then why does hairstyle matter?”

“My dear Isak, a person’s sense of style communicates a certain message which contributes to a first impression. Hairstyle is part of style.”

“Did you learn that in business school?” I can’t help jeering, but as usual he throws it back in my face by smiling and completely ignoring it.

“I learnt it in a fashion article I read just now.” he chirps.

I sigh. “Your hair always looks great.” As do his clothes. The grey three piece suit he has on today is excellent, I also note.

“Yes, but is this hairdo…” he pauses to gesture at his hair. “Saying what I want it to say to these people?”

“What do you want to say to these people?”

Even looks pensive and serious for a moment. “The French are a romantic bunch. Maybe I want them to think I’m a hardass businessman, but one who cares for the sweetness of romance. I want to look like a boss in the office and a gentle lover at home.”

“ _Are_ _you_ a gentle lover at home?”

He shrugs. “I try.”

“Do I need to call your exes to ask?”

“God no.” he recoils at the suggestion, eyes fleetingly widening in horror. “Just help out here.”

“Even, I don’t know what hairstyle will make you look like a hard working lover.” I tell him, making sure my voice intonation stresses how ridiculous he is being. Again that seems to go right over his head.

“What hairstyles do you like seeing me in?”

The question throws me slightly askew and I fish-mouth for a few moments before stuttering out, “I… don’t know. Why does it matter what I think?”

“Because I trust you.” he points out like it’s the most obvious and sensible thing in the world. “Whatever you like, I’m confident that my potential business partners will like it.”

“Are you serious?” I don’t even know why I’m so stunned. I’ve engaged in weirdo conversations and activities with Even in the past. Once, He got invited to London to watch WWE Raw Wrestling match with a business associate of his, and Even forced me to tag along so that he could use me to leave early. I had to do an impromptu act of pretending to be sick. Even hates wrestling.

“Of course.” he puts a pause between the two words; his eyebrow is quirked quizzically at me. “Isn’t it obvious?”

Wow! I’m actually touched. This is a nice reward for all my pains and easily a nice soothing balm for my anger, which I feel start to melt slowly. “Go with that James Dean quiff. You always look great in that. I’m sure your smile will convince them of your softer side.”

Even smiles. “You are brilliant. Thank you.”

“Do you also need help picking out a suit for the meeting?” I ask, actually starting to invest myself in this madness, but I get a chuckle from my boss. 

There is a slight crinkle on his eyebrow like the offer was something silly. “No thanks. My fashion sense is way better than yours.”

Offended and irritated anew, I have to bite back a curse. “will that be all?”

“Yes. You may go back to your office.

********

My agony doesn’t begin or end there unfortunately. Even Bech Naesheim is the neediest person I’ve ever worked for. My job description as an executive assistant includes high level responsibilities like helping my boss solve executive problems; make decisions; and attending certain meetings on his behalf. Then are lower level duties like like making him tea, bringing him his favourite snacks, buying his lunch because he dislikes our cafeteria’s food, feeding his bitchy cat, managing his laundry, planning his programs and appointments, taking his calls etc.

All that is normal and that’s how my job started out until 4 months in when my job description started to expand in a very wayward and unexpected manner to include giving him pep talks and advice whenever he needs it, sometimes forcing him to do his job; quite literally snatching junk food from him because it gives him a stomach ache though he won’t stop eating it; randomly ditching work in the middle of the day for eat ice cream at the park with him because he thinks it’s not fun doing that alone; sitting through his rants and tirades and a lot of other ridiculous duties I’m very sure other executive assistants don’t have to deal with. 

Unfortunately Even chooses today to have another one of his tirades. My Monday afternoon at work is almost peaceful. Most of my work is done and phone calls to the office have slowed down as per usual around 4pm of any day. I decide to reward myself with a delicious cup of cocoa.

I’m in the common break room here on the 18th floor, making myself a cup when Even suddenly bursts into the room and I gape at him in shock. “What are you doing in here?” is the first thing that comes to mind naturally. It’s not like he has never been in the break room, but it’s a rarity. He once said something about how he dislikes mixing with the other staff.

I guess it’s his lucky day since I’m alone in here.

Even blinks at me like he is momentarily wondering why I’d ask such a stupid question. “I came looking for you.”

“oh.” before I can say anything else, Even officially launches into a rant about how professionally incompetent the businessmen from Paris turned out to be during the meeting and; how they can’t possibly be worked with.

I just lean back on the island and dutifully listen, watching him pace. It’s very easy to space out, but I surprise myself when that doesn’t happen. I hate to admit it, but yes I do care about Even’s problems.

And Even as well.

“Am I to take it you won’t be furthering our request for them to invest in our company?” I put in when it seems he has finally emptied the frustration in him.

“Of course not. To think I went out of my way to impress them. Our accounting team worked hard too.”

“Kissing up is a part of the business world. Don’t feel too bad. At the end of the day we still need their money. The board likes Paris too. At least you are trying your best t please both parties.”

Even sighs, hunching his shoulders as he comes over to stand next to me. In the process, the fragrance of his cologne wafts towards me. It’s a new cologne, I note. He smells really good.

“I suppose you are right.” he mutters, peering at me through tired eyes. He always looks like a child when he pouts like this, I quietly think with a small smile. It’s cute. He would scold me if he knew what I’m thinking. He hates it when people call him cute. Sometimes I say it just piss him off.

“And a businessman always dresses to impress so that his dignity stays above water whether he cuts a deal or not.”

His pout finally breaks into a smile and I can’t help doing the same. “You are so smart, you know that?” he points out

“Yes I do.” I say matter-of-factly. “You’re welcome.”

This time he laughs a little. I’ve always been the type to gain satisfaction from solving a problem. I feel the same satisfaction whenever I successfully put a smile and a glimmer of hope on my boss’s face despite his sour mood. That’s my job.

“We’ll keep looking until we find the right investor. We are desperate, but quality is also important.” I add after some time.

“You are right.” he nods, bouncing off the island to stand in front of me with renewed enthusiasm practically bouncing off him. hm maybe I’ve overplayed my card here in restoring his morale, I belatedly regret. This can only mean more work ahead. Fuck!

“We barely have a moment to waste. Come on, we have work to do.” he inclines his head in the direction of his office while I fight back the urge to smack myself.

My mood only worsens when my boss takes my steaming cup of cocoa from the countertop and lifts it to his lips, gently blowing over it.

I frown indignantly at him. “That’s mine. I made it with care.”

Even smiles, takes a sip and hums in appreciation. “I can taste the care. Thanks, Isak. I need this.” with that, he walks off, calling for me to follow. “Come on, Valtersen. We have calls to make.”

I groan and grumble and whine and even almost stomp my feet as I follow my boss to his office.

All this bullshit and it’s only Monday.

********

At about 6PM, I finally call it a day and say my goodbyes to Even. As previously agreed, I meet up with Magnus and his girlfriend Vilde in the ground floor foyer. We have dinner plans together. The two have a typical office romance going on with Magnus working in the marketing department as an advertising officer and Vilde working In HR as assistant. That’s a lethal combination, if you ask me. Marketers need to push products with their colourful use of words, so the department is certainly lucky to have Magnus and his gift for gab. As an officer in the one office that holds everyone’s personal info, Vilde knows quite a lot about the employees here. Vilde’s info plus Magnus’ mouthy nature puts them among the company’s biggest gossips. 

On the other hand I’m at an advantage as their friend because I get fresh gossip from them. 

The three of us head downtown to a Mexican food place to try the famous chicken recipes there. It turns out the place is classier we anticipated. The place is very spacious, positively clean, and the walls are covered in pleasant white and pastel green and peach colours. It’s one of those hushed and serene places with tall green plants by the windows. The waiters look excellent in white whites and the menus are certainly more than just a laminated one-page piece of paper.

We still settle in well enough and make our food orders without fanfare.

The moment we taste our food, we all agree is definitely worth the money we are about to spend here. Vilde asks me about how work is going in the CEO’s office.

“Nothing new.” I respond. “Even is having a hard time as are we all know. He had a meeting today with some potential investors.”

“I heard. How did it go?”

“I’m not allowed to disclose. Even will brief all the employees himself.”

Vilde nods, appearing to see the sense in that. “That’s fair.”

“Indeed. Besides, I don’t want to talk about all that. Even has had hard times since I joined the company. I feel like all his negative energy he has rubbed off on me. It’s like his life is now my life.”

“What does that mean?” asks Magnus

“Let’s just say that Even isn’t exactly the easiest person to work with.”

“So you’ve said. I’m sure it’s not that bad.”

“Today he snatched my Cocoa right from my hand.”

“It’s just cocoa, dude.”

My eyebrows furrow because apparently I’m still hurt. “I made it with care.” 

Vilde sighs, “Even is having a hard time, right?”  
“Yeah, so?”

“Be nice to the guy. I’m sure he really needed that cup of cocoa.”

“Why is nobody ever on my side?” I grumble

“We are on your side all the time. Right now you’re just being petty. Really Isak, you should try to be more grateful.” Vilde ‘s eyebrows are knitted and her mouth is set in a thin line. She looks irritated.

Beside her, Magnus nods. “Exactly. You should thank Vilde for finding you some work at all.”

“Still. Nobody told me that I’d be taking on a job where I’d have to babysit my boss.”

“since you complain so damn much, don’t date Even. He’s probably one of those clingy boyfriends.”

For a moment I’m entirely gob smacked, shocked by how random my friend can be. “why on earth would I date my boss?”

Magnus just shrugs, looking me dead in the eye and chewing his food.

I’m about to reply when my phone rings. It’s Even calling. Giving my friends a deadpan look, I turn my phone screen towards them so they can see whose calling.

The two look at each other first with expressions I can’t really read and then they turn back to me, “see what he wants first.” Vilde tells me.

Rolling my eyes, I answer. “Yes, Even?”

“Are you at home?”

“Not yet. I’m having dinner with my friends.”

“I need your help. Let me know when you’re done with dinner.”

“Is it work related?”

“of course.”

I face palm but summon my best patient voice. “Even, can’t we handle it tomorrow?”

“It must be tonight. Call me when you’re done.” With that he cuts the call

Putting my phone back down, I give my friends another deadpan look. “He needs my help with work.”

“Now? That sucks, man.” Magnus sympathises.

Vilde gestures at his food. “At least finish your dinner first before you leave. Try to hang in there until you find better work.”

I’m trying.

********

“I’m here now. How can I help you?” I’m as polite as possible, because no matter how bitter I feel about this, I still need my pay check.

I got home, took a shower, brushed my teeth and now I’m sitting at my small kitchen table on a video call with Even. According to the ugly ass oil painting on the wall behind him, Even is at home in his living room. He has on a pure white t-shirt and his mused hair looks a darker shade of blonde, like it’s moist or wet. He was recently in the shower.

“Right.” Even smiles and then immediately goes into boss mode, giving me instructions about arranging a business breakfast for tomorrow morning with his former stock broker this week.

“Alright, but couldn’t you have told me this at the office before I left?”

“The need hadn’t come until a short while ago.”

“Are you working from home again?”

“It’s hard not to right now.”

“Be that as it may, I don’t get paid for overtime. This is overtime.”

“Really?” he looks genuinely surprised. I guess that went over his head the last time I mentioned it. His eyebrows furrow as he appears to get lost in a thought that only lasts a few seconds. “Have HR review your contract.”

“I think that’s more your place than mine.”

“And you are my assistant. Now I’m asking my assistant to go to HR and ask them to look over a contact and make adjustments.”

Great! More work. I want to roll my eyes and complain, and maybe hang up too. My restraint is really divine sometimes, like now. “Okay.”

“Good. Now I need your help picking out a theme for my tumblr.”

“The one where you blog about romance films?”

“That’s the one. My reviews recently gained a lot of attention and I want to make some changes to my account. I called you to help me out.”

My jaw drops. “I was having dinner with friends.”

“You already mentioned that. So, do you think I’m more or a purple or orange theme kind of guy? I’m thinking purple.”

I groan and drop my head on the table, the new throbbing on my forehead not nearly enough to cushion my irritation. 

********

The next day, I storm into my office, Isak not far behind me. “I ruined everything.”

“Of course you did.” Isak replies, crossing his arms against his chest while slowly closing the distance between himself and I after closing the office door.

“I could tell that the shareholders hated the whole thing. It was extremely embarrassing and disheartening.”

“As it should.”

I glare at my assistant. “Yes, just kick a man while he’s down.”

Isak finally comes to a halt just in front of me and looks up at me, shrugging unapologetically, “what do you want me to say? You went against everything we agreed you’d say. The marketing department will be so disappointed in the way you presented their ideas.”

“I know.” I groan in despair and regret and quite frankly even embarrassment. “Damn it I know. It’s just… your copy of the proposal was right there and so was mine ….” I trail off

“And you thought your proposal structure is obviously the better one because you are the CEO.” Isak supplies as I undoubtedly knew he would.

I turn toward my desk and brace my hands on it, letting my head hang as I groan again. I feel so helpless and stupid, my mind still reeling from the harsh comments I so recently got from the members of the board.

So far Isak Valtersen has proved to be an excellent assistant who has stirred me in the wrong direction. I don’t know why I didn’t listen to him on this. My pride is a problem sometimes.

I hear movement behind me and Isak lays his hand on my shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze. I slowly lift my head and turn around to look at him.

The gesture isn’t unwelcome. In fact I quite like it. I’m just stunned. In the time Isak has worked for me, he has seen me at my very worst and was a rock I could draw strength from when I had nothing left. He can be strict, brusque and crass when it comes to work, and as a person he can be very grumpy, but I’ve definitely been on the receiving end of his comfort and kindness. The reason I’m surprise now is because I don’t expect him to sympathise with me in a situation like this when I’m to blame for my failure. He usually hates it when I go against his advice. I suppose Isak can be even more caring.

Wearing a small smile, he says. “You are human and you are allowed to make mistakes; even big ones. The important thing is to learn from them.” He pauses and creepily grins like a wizard. “Besides, it’s not easy for a man of your status to admit that his mere assistant is more brilliant than he is.”

“Wow, you’re so humble yourself.”

“Yes I’m both brilliant and humble.” He says, deliberately ignoring my sarcasm.

I purse my lips and roll my eyes at him, but I also can’t hold back my smile because as much as Isak just insulted me, he has also said some really comforting and reassuring words.

“You are right.” I straighten back up and Isak’s hand slides away. The place he just touching feels strangely devoid. Still, I feel rejuvenated now and I’m ready to make amends, thanks to him.

“Of course I am. Now let’s begin fixing this. It’s not too late to request another audience, but we have to redo the proposal.”

“I’m sorry I disregarded your notes before. Will you help me out again?”

Isak smirks wolfishly. “Lucky for you I have a big heart.”

“A big and pompous heart.”

“Hey you are the one who insists on going against what I say, regretting it not long after and ultimately inflating my ego.” he points out, shrugging and stalking off towards my fridge.

“I can’t argue with that.” I ruefully mutter under my breathe, and then a little louder I add, “Grab we a red bull please. I need the energy to redo the entire proposal.”

A few moments after, Isak returns and hands me a lemon flavoured ice tea, a bottle of water in his other hand. “This is not a red bull.”

“By the way, the sooner you stop wasting money on that stuff, the better. I’ll just keep throwing it out.” the authoritative tone of his voice and the warning gleam in his eyes thwart any argument I am about to make.

I meekly concede with a nod and Isak doesn’t hesitate to throw me a victorious smile. He rarely smiles wide and when he does, it’s captivating as it is creepy. I think that’s how I always let him get away with bullying me.

*********

“Your suit for tonight’s event is ready.” Isak informs me as we are making our way back to my office from the boardroom where I was trapped in a 2-hour long meeting with my auditing team to discuss how to win over a potential Japanese investor.

“ahh the charity event.” I say with mock excitement that I’m sure Isak doesn’t care for.

“Yes.”

“Is there a way of getting out of it?” My Thursday nights aren’t exactly special and I never exactly get up to anything exceptional, but I’d literally rather be doing anything that spending hours comparing wallet thickness with a bunch of business world jerks. 

“No. it’ll bank you some goodwill.”

“Fine.” My tone is as resigned as I feel. “I’ll go.”

“Just to make sure that happens, I’ll drive you.”

“That won’t be necessary. I don’t need guidance in taking obligation.”

“Sure you don’t.” Isak deadpans like what I just said is something he’s heard one too many times and has grown bored with how far-fetched it is. 

I open my mouth to argue, but my phone rings and interrupts me. So I just let it go.

*******

“I hired a driver so that you can accompany me to the charity dinner.” I announce to Isak later on in the day, around 3pm. He doesn’t look any more enthusiastic than I do. In fact I expect him to complain, but surprisingly he doesn’t. It’s probably because I won’t let him off anyway.

“Well, the good news is that the event will have alcoholic beverages.”

“I couldn’t agree more.”

*******

Fredrick- the driver for hire- pulls into the driveway, and a valet opens my door.

“Shall we?” I turn to Isak with a huge, fake smile.

“That’s good.” he points at his smile. “Keep that up.”

I want to roll my eyes at him but I contain myself. “Stick close to me.” I demand because honestly Isak is my only sanity at these boring ass events. At least he and I can gossip about the pretentious attendees.

“Yes, sir.” He smiles as well and I like to think it’s because he is happy to have my company as well.

We step out of the car and walk the lantern lit stone walkway leading to the grounds at the rear. There are a steady stream of Oslo’s exclusive businessmen and businesswomen arriving at the same time as me, dressed to impress. Several photographers from newspapers and magazines are present, politely asking guests to pose for pictures.

“Mr. Bech Naesheim!” one of the photographers calls. I nod in acceptance, lead Isak to stand beside me and we pose for a few photos.

At the end of the path, suited servers hold trays of glasses overflowing with champagne, and my mood improves right way at the sight of alcohol. I need a damn drink. I’m grateful when Isak passes me a glass.

“Thanks.”

We approach the grounds and the place has formally arranged tables and chairs over-dressed in white linen, fancy paper lanterns, ice sculptures, candles, flowers, an elaborate makeshift stage facing the tables and a makeshift black marble dance floor in the centre of the tables. There is a band playing some soft jazz music on the stage. It’s basically show-off business as usual, I note impassively.

My eyes scan the guests that are congregating and chatting over glasses of champagne on the dance floor. I’m trying to see who the least irritating person to talk to is.

Isak reads my mind and leans towards me to whisper the names of the people he has already spotted. I’m listening attentively until someone calls out my name and Isak and I turn towards where the voice could possibly be coming from.

A young woman appears out of the throng and throws her arms around my neck. It’s Emma Larzen, an old friend of mine who also has a huge crush on my assistant. She looks stunning in a royal blue dress and a pretty smile to go with that.

“Hi, Emma. You look great.” I’m holding her at arm’s length.

“Thanks, Even.” As if it’s almost painful for her to continue giving me any attention, she quickly turns to Isak with a huge smile.

“Hi, Isak.” She gives him a quick hug. “It’s good to see you.”

“Yeah. You too.” Isak’s smile is far too tense for anything convincing. I can’t wait to laugh at him later. Emma has had a crush on him for months now and there is nothing he hasn’t done to avoid her advances. He even hid in my bathroom once when she came to my office to visit him. He was stuck in there of over an hour. Good times.

There is barely any space between Emma and Isak because she keeps stepping forward with every step he takes backwards. “You’ve hidden form me for too long now. I’m not letting you out of my sight this evening.”

Isak’s lips are twitching nervously and he shoots me a quick help-me glance. 

In the most convincing way, I step into boss mode. “I’m sorry, Emma but I brought my assistant here because I need his help and that means he has to stay close to me.”

Emma turns a hostile look towards me and hisses, much to my amusement and surprise.

My gaze slides to Isak. _I tried,_ I’m telling him

 _Try harder,_ his eyes plead with me

I turn my attention back to Emma with my most charming smile. “If you want a date my assistant, we can discuss that later, but for tonight please let Isak be. He and I have some important matters to discuss with the other business people here.”

She pouts at me, but at least it looks like she is considering it.

Eventually she concedes with a sigh. “Alright, you two can have your way now, but I better not see another woman on Isak’s arm.”

“I’ll make sure of it.” I promise her. “I’ll do my best to protect your future husband.” 

Emma blushes and hides a grin behind her palm. “See you two later.” She says and walks away to meet her friends who have up to this point been watching our interaction with keen eyes, perhaps one of two even sending me not-so-subtle winks.

“Future husband? Really?” Isak schools me the moment Emma is out of sight.

“I was only helping.” For some reason I can’t wipe the huge grin on my face. Maybe it has something to do with how amusing I find it when Isak gets all grumpy.

“You’re enabling her useless fantasies. I think you enjoy watching me suffer.”

“A bit.” I admit with an unapologetic shrug and Isak scowls at me like I just trampled on a puppy. I burst into a full blown laugh and pat him on the shoulder. “Admit it. that was a little funny.”

“I’m being stalked. How is that funny?”

“Stalked?” I laugh harder. Isak can be hilariously dramatic sometimes. “Will you feel better if I tell you that I’ll help you get her off your back?”

“Only if you promise me.”

“I promise.”

“okay.” He looks like he actually believes me. “Thank you.”  
“For the life of me, I don’t get how she is still hung up on you even after you told her you are gay.”

“Tell me about it.” Isak downs the rest of his champagne in one huge swig. “I need another drink.”

“Come, let’s go drink and socialise more.” I stir him towards the dance floor.

********

I spend the next hour in a whirlwind of introductions, greetings, small talk, business talk, kissing up to eminent chairpersons of companies doing way better than mine because I need them on my side. At this point I fear my jaw might unhinge from all the fake smiling.

Thankfully the servers move effortlessly through the growing crowd of guests with bottles of champagne, topping off my glass with perfect regularity. Isak is close beside me, warning me against drinking too much because apparently the alcohol is making me a lot less charming and a bit too honest. There is never room for honesty in business.

Isak is right and maybe I do need to slow down a bit because I’m beginning to feel light-headed.

“So you are the CEO of Golden Gates Manufacturing?” asks a balding, blond haired, plump bodied gentleman. If I’m not mistaken, his name is John Karlsen, chairman of a lingerie brand. I could be mistaken though because the more I drink, the more all these old men look more and more alike. “I heard what happened to your company. It must be tough taking over a company that’s in bad shape.” The man offers me a friendly smile and a pat on the arm. “If you need any advice at all, I’m happy to help. Your father helped me a lot when I was starting out.”

“Thank you.”

“We should have dinner some time.”

“Indeed. I’ll have my assistant contact you.”

 _Great._ The evening has barely begun and I’m already getting bored and annoyed by all the corporate talk. So far the only highlight is Isak running into his stalker Emma. He might hate me for bringing him here, but I thank goodness for his presence.

This is about to be one long ass night.


	2. Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy valentines day everyone<3 I hope you'll enjoy this chapter. Thanks for the love you've shown this story so far<3 You're welcome to comment on what you think about how the story it's going.

“I Heard rumours of a hostile takeover.” I have joined another group of old conglomerates and I admit they are far less friendly compared to the group I just left. These guys are not holding anything back when it comes to stressing how much of a pinch I’m in at Golden Gates. For heaven’s sake they even mentioned my company’s overdue tax payments a few moments ago. The red-haired one whose name I’ve honestly forgotten already is talking to me now.

“That’s only a rumour.” I reply as politely as possible. My gaze slides to the lovely wives of these old bastards, who have to loyally stand beside their husbands and bear this boring corporate talk without a single chance of getting a word in. the kind of men who attend these events are the chauvinistic kind that believe the business world or any professional field is no place for women.

Half of the reason they resent me is because Golden Gates’ chairperson is a woman, my mother.

“You have to be careful now. There are a lot of green mailers on the prowl right now.”

Another man with slicked back dark hair nods, adding, “Should you be faced with a green mail or hostile takeover situation, contact my accounting team. We might be in a position to offer you a white knight deal.”

“I won’t forget your kind offer, sir.”

“Nonsense. Call me Glen. Your father and I were very close. He was a good man.”

“Ladies and gentlemen!” The master of ceremonies, wearing a neat black, interrupts us. “Please take your seats. Dinner is served.”

Thank heavens. I can’t take another second of getting business administration advice or hearing about what a great man my father was and how it’s in my best interest to follow in his social footsteps.

“You’re doing great.” Isak tells me as we go to find our table.

“You think so?” I eye him doubtfully and he flashes me a grin with two thumbs up. He looks like an overzealous cheerleader and at least that puts a genuine smile on my face for the first time in over an hour.

Isak consults the seating plan and leads me to our table. Our tablemates are already there and I’m surprised that its people I’m quite familiar with, both young men of my own age. One of them is squeaky-clean-image Oliver Berg, founder and CEO of a known jewellery brand.

As per usual, beside him is his sweet but nosey wife Harriet. I’ve heard talk among the ladies at the country club that if anyone needs dirty gossip about anyone’s romantic relations, Harriet is the person to ask.

Oliver and I know each other from back when we were in the same lacrosse team in university.

In Oliver and Harriet’s company at the table are Filip Henriksen and his on-and-off long-time girlfriend Sarah Lund. Filip makes it a point for everyone to know that he can get any girl he wants. He probably spends more time fucking around than actually doing his job as vice chairman of his father’s organic food company. I know him from our country club interactions here and there as well as the occasional social event such as this one.

We all exchange pleasantries as Isak and I take our seats next to each other.

Harriet is on my right side and she cranes her neck to peer at Isak who is on my left side, “Even, when are we going to see you bring a date to these events?” she asks.

Oh God! I’ve barely sat down and someone already starting in on me about my personal life. I swear I’m getting closer and closer to losing my fucking mind. Every time I think I’m starting to get used to these events after all these years, some shit like this happens and reminds me that it’s impossible to get used to an atmosphere such as this one. I can only pretend so much. 

“Harriet is right.” Her husband adds. “Year after year we attend these events with lovely ladies present. I’m sure it’s not hard for you to find someone. It must be getting boring even for you always having your assistant for company.”

“Not that it’s any of your business, but I do date.”

Oliver gives me a doubtful look. “Admittedly we’ve seen you with some people here and there, but I’m talking about a serious relationship.”

“I’ve had serious relationships.”

“Not since Sonja.” Harriet says and of course she would bring Sonja up. The two know each other.

I take a quick glance at Isak and he barely seems fazed by the conversation. I admire how impassive he always is with things like this. I think I care too much. Maybe that comes from growing up in an environment where picking on each other’s weaknesses is the norm. All these jerks pretend they are showing concern for my life when it’s actually just a way of talking about my problems and laughing at me behind my back.

I’m a man who possesses strength and endurance, but that’s not enough to deal with the gossip that surrounds me.

For the past two years or so I’ve been on the receiving end of people’s pity thanks to my failed romances; an embarrassing manic episode 8 months ago which forced me to go public with my bipolar disorder diagnosis; and of course how I’m the loyal son who took over his father’s failing company in the hopes of reviving it, but has notably failed. I’m nothing but a charity case to these people in all ways that matter.

“I like having my assistant around. He is good company.” I tell Harriet.

Sarah jumps in with a coy smile. “Yes, but I think a nice romance would be a great distraction right now from all your work problems.”

“I guarantee that it wouldn’t be.”

Sarah is about to say more when Isak cuts her off saying, “I spoke to Emma Larzen earlier and she tells me that Sarah Lund is the talk of the ladies’ community. Looking at you now, I understand why. You look very lovely tonight.”

“Thank you, Isak.” Sarah smiles, all flattered. “Is that true?” she asks with such fake modesty as though such things don’t really matter to her. Everyone knows that it does otherwise she wouldn’t be dating a typically handsome and wealthy womaniser like Filip. That’s probably why Isak is using that to deter her attention from my personal business. 

Thank goodness for Isak. I glance at him and subtlety mouth _thanks_. He smiles and gives me is you-owe-me-one look.

Suddenly, there’s the hiss of a microphone, and the host Mr Haugen’s voice booms over the public address system, causing the prattle of voices to die down.

“Welcome, ladies and gentleman, to my annual charity dinner. I hope that you enjoy what we have laid out for you tonight and that you’ll diligently support the wonderful work that we do to provide safe and well equipped sports centres for homeless and less fortunate children.”

Polite applause follows, and then the sound of chatter starts again.

Again, this is going to be a long night.

***********

“Oh look. The secretaries’ corner is over there. Why don’t you go and socialise.” Even suggests long after dinner and the auction have passed. We are back to socialising on the dance floor after everyone has spent copious amounts of money on some bullshit. At least it’s for a good cause.

I’m very impressed that Even managed to endure the whole thing without running away.

“I hate the secretaries squad. I don’t want to go over.” I’m sure the amount of hate I feel is evident in my tone of voice. All secretaries and PAs do is gossip about who is going bankrupt, who is having an affair, who is a slave-driver boss by nature and really the list goes on. That’s not my kind of company at all.

“You wanted to come here tonight so if I suffer, you suffer too.” Evens replies and I shoots me such a dirty and indignant look. The bastard just laughs at me. 

“That’s very petty of you.”

“So what else is new?”

“is this how you repay me for helping out when Harriet and oliver attacked your personal life?”

“I helped you with Emma. We are even. Besides, those people are irritatingly nosy, but you should go over and say hi at least. At the end of the day that’s your support group and you don’t want them thinking that you consider yourself better than they are.”

As much as I hate to admit it, sometimes Even does stir me in the right directions a swell. For the most part, I do the supporting in my business relationships with Even, but there are rarely seen moments as well when he supports me too.

“I hate it when you’re right.”

He smirks. “I know.” He finalises and leaves me there with a pat on the arm then he walks away to probably find the least boring looking group of conglomerates to chit-chat with, if that’s possible.

*********

The 30 minutes I’ve spend talking to the other secretaries and Pas feels like hours. At least I tried for the sake of showing camaraderie. Like Even told me, I’d hate for our community to assume I think I’m better than them. Apart from how desperately I need to escape all the gossiping, it’s also time to check on my boss and see how he is fairing.

I look around while walking about but it’s impossible to see clearly with the throng of attendants. It doesn’t help that a good number happen to have Even’s build, height and healthy blonde hair. Taking my phone out, I try to call his phone and it goes straight to voicemail. A bad feeling is already creeping up at the back of my mind. As I ask around for Even and everyone keep saying they haven’t seen him, I get the sinking feeling that deep down I know what’s going on here.

Even probably bailed on the party. It wouldn’t be the first time.

Damn it!

_I am going to kill him._

********

The garden is the last place I expect to find Even but there he is on the lawn among the flowers, casually lounging on a swing bench with one leg draped over the other and he has a bottle of champagne in his hand.

I walk up to him and stop just shy of his personal space. “Even, what’s this?” I’m seething.

He looks up at me unremorseful and smiles, “so you found me.”

“You seriously ran away from the party?” I ask, part wondering why I’m surprised when Even has pulled this shit before, and worse.

“It’s so annoying over there. I couldn’t take another second.”

“And you think I’m having fun smiling at and socialising with all those corporate people to make you look good? Of course it’s hard for me too, but I’m still trying for your sake.”

“aww you’re like the husband I never had.”

My expression hardens and I pull my lips thin, narrowing my eyes at him. Even appears to sense my growing annoyance and irritation that I might smack him, so he nervously fidgets and clears his throat, giving me a pacifying smile.

“I’m actually upset with you.” I tell him just in case it’s not clear.

Sighing, he finally rearranges his facial expression into something that looks truly apologetic. “I’m sorry. I know I shouldn’t have bailed on you like that.” he pauses and then reaches out for my hand, tugging on it. “Please sit.”

Looking away, I roll my eyes by comply. The moment I sit down, I can feel the warm radiating from Even’s body and it’s a welcome shield from the biting cold night air.

“I’m trying.” Even says

“I know. At least you showed up, so I guess that’s something.”

“hm.” He hums

“Don’t force me to nag.”

“I think you enjoy it.”

“I don’t. In fact I don’t even nag you that much.”

Even just hums and I continue staring at him. My gaze drops to his lips and I take notice of how dry and chapped they look probably because of the cold. The rest of his face doesn’t appear to be managing the weather to well either. Sighing in annoyance, I reach into my pocket and take out a small cosmetics bag I always carry with me to events with Even.

At the corner of my eye, I can see him peering curiously at the bag as I unzip it. What’s that?” he finally asks.

“I got tired of telling you to carry some face cream for your dry skin, so I carry it myself now.”

“Oh. I always wonder how you carry those cosmetics around.”

“So you haven’t noticed the bag?”

“Not really.”

“You need to pay more attention to things, Even especially things that concern you.”

“That’s what I have you for.”

I ignore that remark and ask him to face me instead, which he does without fanfare and even leans over towards me.

That’s when I really get a good look at him. This is more than just the cool weather being cruel to his skin. Even looks exhausted and disillusioned and sadly it’s a familiar sight. He gets this way sometimes when he’s jet lagged, stressed from spending long hours in the office and when he’s been socialising for a little too long with the vultures in his social circle.

This is the part where my job gets really tough because It’s my responsibility to make sure Even performs all necessary professional and social duties; at the same time as a human being with a healthy beating heart, I hate shoving him into situations such as these social events where he always seems so painfully lonely despite being among so many people.

Even’s responsibilities are really chipping away at him. It’s quite agonising to watch and I wouldn’t wish Even’s hardships upon anyone. He has been troubled for as long as I’ve known him and almost 2 years is a very long time to be perpetually stressed. 

With time I’ve learned a lot about Even’s professional and personal life and that has allowed me to get better and better at easing his burdens as his assistant. His life is busy and chaotic, which makes mine busy and chaotic as well since I have to follow him around. On top of that, Even has moments when he turns into an errant, petulant or rebellious child who just wants to hide in his bedroom forever because the world he has to face outside is so harsh. There have been times when I had to go to his apartment to literally drag him out of bed and encourage him to keep doing his best.

Other times he gets depressed and helping him through that is a lot more complicated that just dragging him out of bed and muttering some motivational words. Nothing about working for him is easy and I’ve thought of running way to a better job at a company, better boss as well as a better pay.

At the same time I’ve grown weirdly attached and deathly loyal to Even in a way that I don’t believe anyone can take better care of him than I can. The guy is already pitiful and I can’t find it in my heart to run away from him now and leave him in the hands of someone who might not understand him or add to his heap of burdens. 

Even needs someone who can logically decide when to push him to carry out his obligations and when it’s okay for him to get away from certain obligations so that he can rest and be a young carefree man. I guess I got good at that with time and that’s why it’s not wise for Even to change assistants now when his problems are just at their highest yet.

I took a 2-week long leave 2 months ago to go on vacation in Madrid, and let’s just say that I got a glimpse of how messy Even’s life can get without my help. When I returned, he gave me this look- like he was finally seeing some light after days of total darkness. It was quite heart breaking. I never want to see him look so lost and desperate ever again.

“Now is an odd time to space out.” Even drawls, interrupting my train of thought.

I blink at him a few times as my mind slowly return to the task at hand. “Sorry.” I smile sheepishly.

Squeezing some lotion onto my hand, I spread it out between both palms and reach up to carefully apply it on Even’s face. Next, I comb my fingers through his hair to put some stray locks back into place. As a finishing touch, I apply some chapstick to his lips and smile at the pleasing finished work.

“Now you look like a suave and handsome CEO again.”

“I didn’t a moment ago?”

“You don’t really want me to answer that.”

Even seems to agree with that and remains silent.

Long after I’ve packed my little bag away and minutes of companionable silence have ticked away, Even asks. “Do you think we’re making any headway at the party?”

It’s a difficult question to answer because I’m not sure I want to depress Even right now. Unfortunately my silence communicates the truth of the matter to him and he hums. The kind of hum I’ve come to know means he is processing and trying to accept a tough situation.

“We’ll keep trying. You’re doing a good job of restoring these people’s faith in your company.” I rush to comfort him, but he only offers me a sad smile.

“You’re my assistant, so you have to say that out of respect because I’m your boss.”

“Yes, but not entirely. You know I’m always honest with you.”

His smile looks a little genuine this time, “I guess you are brutally honest even when I reprimand you for it.”

“That’s why you need to trust me right now. We’ll keep doing our best. Your father made careless mistakes, but that’s not you and eventually everyone will see that. Give it a little time and avoid worrying so much about our future. Minute by minute, remember?”

The corners of his mouth curl into a soft smile. “Yes I remember. You are right.” He nods and seems assuaged at least. If nothing else works to calm him down, at least that does. After his embarrassing manic episode, Even struggled a lot with facing the world again and that was only another problem added to the list of the issues he already had at home with his mother and at work.

He wouldn’t stop stressing, so I encouraged him to do what I do: take each minute as it comes and focus only on that until the next one comes. I’ve learned first-hand that worrying about tomorrow never makes anything better. Thankfully Even bought into my logic and here we are.

“Let’s go back to the party. You can’t afford to look like you’re slacking.”

“Alright we’ll go back in a minute. Can we sit here for a little while longer and just talk?”

Well I have no reason to deny him that. Even can be a handful, but he is somewhat good company. “Sure. What do you want to talk about?”

“The most recent star wars movie. I finally came around to watching the mess.”

“Oh God.” I snarl in disdain roll my eyes hard. “In that case I need a drink too.” I take the bottle of champagne from his hand and take a huge swig.

Even laughs at me as he takes the bottle back. “It is a bad movie.”

Maybe we haven’t made much progress here tonight where making Even’s business associates like him any better, but we haven’t lost entirely. Even is probably feeling dejected and disheartened as per usual after situations like this, but he is still laughing with me and that’s a victory that counts too.

*************

As per every Tuesday morning at 11AM, I’m helping Even peruse through this week’s expenses report from Brian, our cost accounting officer. We go over it relatively quickly thanks to practice.

“At this level of excellence, you should be my accountant.” Even says afterwards because for some reason he is always so amazed by how good I am at my job.

“I know.”

“Don’t tell Brian I said that.”

“I’m proud not petty.”

Even laughs, “have you completed looking over my travel expenses?”

“Yes and the answer is no, you can’t take that trip to Australia right now.”

“Too expensive?”

“Exactly. Our financial position is a bit weak right now. We must cut costs.”

“But I’d be going to Australia on business.” Even argues, adamant. Isak gives him a how-stupid-do-you-think-i-am look.

“What business?”

“I know some potential investors over there. they might appreciate it if I go there to talk in person.”

“I’ve been your assistant for a long time, Even. You can’t lie to me that easily.”

Even sighs irritably and rolls his eyes like a petulant child. I struggle not to chuckle at his ridiculously cute it look. “Okay I’m tightly wound from running a company that seems to be going under no matter how hard I try, so yes I’m dying for a vacation.”

That I can sympathise with. Even’s father passed away a few years back and left him with a sinking logistics company to revamp and run. The company is in a bad credit position and has lost trust and goodwill because of that unpaid credit that goes as far back as 10 years ago.

Exactly 3 years ago, Golden Gates logistics saw a huge financial crisis as a result of an over-ambitious venture to launch a new technologically advanced product for the rapidly progressing technology market. Desperate to turn things around, Golden Gates Logistics’ owner and Even’s father advised the accounting team to embark on employing money market instruments. Several loans were acquired, but that only cushioned the blow of launching a product that the company wasn’t ready to undertake.

From money it became increasingly difficult to pool money internally for investment in other new products. As a result sales started dropping against heightening costs and the company sunk deeper and deeper in accumulating interest on unpaid loans. To make matters worse, Even’s father suffered a heart attack about a year after the problems in the company began. No one knows what Even’s father suffered a heart attack not long after, but rumours suggested it was because of pressure from his failing company. At that time, Even was working as a marketing expert at a reputable consultancy agency in New York.

Not long after suffering the heart attack, Even’s father passed away and the remaining shareholders as well as the vice chairlady, also Even’s mother, decided to do some restructuring in the company with the hopes of restoring its glory. When Even came to Oslo for his father’s funeral, the board members and friends of Even’s late father asked Even to join Golden Gates and help with its restoration, following the removal of its then CEO. Confident that Even’s business skill and experience would help, the board backed him and appointed him as the company CEO.

Even wasn’t confident in working with the previous CEO’s assistant, so he hired an assistant of his own and that’s when I joined thanks to Vilde’s help. I was administrative assistant to the MD of a bakery back then and Vilde- who was assistant HR at the time- advised me to apply the position of executive assistant to the CEO of Golden Gate Cosmetics.

Reinstating a dilapidated company, however, proved harder for Even and everyone else here than they all expected. To say Even has been through hell the past year and a half, trying to do just that is putting it lightly. It’s also true that none that of his efforts seem to be working so I understand why he wants to go away on vacation and possibly never return.

Even isn’t letting up, “I can travel on personal capacity with my own money.” He argues, determined to get his way.

“We are in the middle of trying to expand our portfolio and more importantly we urgently need to find a investor for our overdue tax situation or we’ll have some serious legal issues. You can’t travel now. Everybody here has faith in you. That’s why we are still here despite the low wages.”

Even’s lips quirk up. “I don’t know if that’s comporting or insulting.”

“And luckily you have a smart support figure like me to keep you afloat.” With that, I open my diary to update Even on his schedules for today.

“I have scheduled your teleconference video call with Mr. Bennet for this afternoon at 4pm. Also, our managing director wants to have dinner with you this evening. He would like to discuss something with you.”

“Am I available for that tonight?”

“Yes. I already made a reservation for you in a private lounge at a restaurant he favours. I’ll text you the address shortly.”

“Okay I’ll meet him. Shall I pick you up at 7pm from your place?”

“Me? Why?”

Even leans back in his chair and chuckles. “Well I’m not going alone to endure some boring business talk with an old friend of my father’s.”

“That’s unfortunate for you, but it has nothing to do with me.”

“You are my assistant, and that means assisting me whenever I need you to. In this case I need you to assist me with carrying the load of a boring business dinner.”

I look away from him in disbelief, really trying not to scoff because that’s impolite and I need the pay check I get here to pay rent. “Again, I’m not paid overtime.”

“Then consider it a favour.”

“But-”

“Wear that navy blue suit I like. Leave out the tie. It makes you look too uptight.”

“Yes, sir.” I mutter between clenched teeth. Gathering my wits, I continue to update him. “Wilhelm industries called to say they’d like to arrange a meeting with you next week Tuesday afternoon.”

“Call them back to confirm that date, set up the time and make reservations at a nice gentleman’s club.”

“Will do. Connie from management accounting says her report on our profit margin versus our pay-outs in salaries is ready.”

“Tell her to have in on my desk by 2PM today.” Even sighs tiredly and honestly I understand the stress he is under. “Lastly…” I’m smiling now, happy to deliver him some good news. “I scheduled your spa appointment at the Elma Hotel and Spa.”

“Awesome. Let’s both go. We’ve both been stuck in here working hard for days. We need to relax a bit.”

“Seriously?”

“It’ll be fun.”

“For you maybe. I’ll just sit there watching you moan in bliss as your tired bones snap back into place.”

Even laughs, hard, like I’m the most hilarious person on earth. “I promise not to moan like a sexually repressed predator.” He finally says after catching his breathe.

*******

The spa treatment is exactly what I needed. Isak and I get massages, facials, manicures, pedicures and some other body treatments.

Once we are done with everything including showering, we both recline on the couch in our private spa room, still in our bathrobes. Isak ordered us some green tea because it’s good for us to detox the inside of our bodies after cleansing the outside. It’s torture. I hare green tea and he is well aware. That’s why he is watching me with amusement as I struggle to take a single sip.

“You’ll thank me later.” He says.

“No I won’t. So, what happened to protesting the idea of joining me at the spa in the middle of the day?” I have a shit eating grin on my face as I wait to for what possible answer he’ll give me.

Honestly I’m a little stunned and amused as well by how much Isak is enjoying himself. In the span of an hour he went from protesting the idea of getting a massage in the middle of a work day, to purring like a distressed cat as the masseuse works his tension away. “You hated every second of this huh.” I tease him some more.

I can tell he wants to roll to his eyes but is holding back because I’m his boss. “Alright I admit it, these massages are good.” He says slightly waspish.

“You are welcome.”

“… and also overrated.”

I raise my eyebrows at him, asking him to elaborate and he does, explaining. “Everybody pretends that massages are always perfect, and relaxing. Theoretically that’s true but in the actual sense they are just painful half the time. It’s like spooning in bed. Looks cute, relaxing and nice, but in the actual sense someone’s limbs are going numb and they are afraid to ruin the moment by admitting it.”

“Wow. Sounds like you’ve given this a lot of thought.

“I have. Just now actually, while I was getting my massage.”

“Really? Does that mean your massage wasn’t that nice?”

“It could have been better. It wasn’t relaxing enough seeing as I was thinking so hard.”

“maybe you’re just uptight.”

He sips his tea, unfazed by my insult. “Do you feel better after your massage?”

“Yes thank you. I’m ready to conquer the rest of the work day.”

“Good.” He smiles, looking genuinely happy to see me in higher spirits. I know it’s all professional capacity but I get a warm feeling in my chest whenever he shows how much he cares for my wellbeing. I’m aware of the huge burden he carries on his shoulders assisting an affection starved person like me.

Tagging him along to things like this to spoil him a bit is sort of my way of saying thanks to Isak for his patience and kindness; for putting up with insatiable need to have him with me wherever I go. My neediness must confuse and frustrate him. Maybe one day I’ll find the words to explain to him how lonely and discombobulated I get when he is not around. 8 months when I was at my lowest point in life, Isak stayed beside me every step of the way until I was strong enough to face the world again. I don’t know if he realises it but that’s the moment something changed between us. Isak is no longer simply my assistant. I avoid describing in words what he means to me because I’m a little frightened of them myself; because if I know what those words are, I’ll be faced with the chilling thoughts of what will happen to me the day Isak up and walks out of my life.

“What are you thinking so deeply about?” Isak quietly, but It’s audible enough to pull me from my thoughts.

“Nothing.” I shake my head at him and try another sip of my tea. God it’s awful.

“It’s not _nothing_.” He says in a matter-of-fact way, reminding me how freakishly well he can read my mood changes and what those changes mean. “Whatever it is, stop it. Minute by minute.” He gently reminds me.

I smile and nod. “Minute by minute.” And then to bring back the light mood, I ask. “Should we have lunch here? Their salad menu is great.”

Isak’s interest gets visibly piqued. “Do they have the farm salad?”

“Then I’ll make them include it to the menu.” I smirk and wiggle my eyebrows at him, making him smile.


	3. Three

For the sheer reason that I totally need to get a less co-dependant boss, and a damned life, I actually get ready to have dinner with Even and our managing director, Jackson. I even comply with his demand that I wear my navy blue suit. Seriously, my life is wrong on so many levels.

“I can’t believe Even asked you to get dolled up and you actually did.” I can tell Sana is pursing her lips in an effort not to laugh at me.

“Yes and please don’t tell the others, especially Vilde. She’ll tell Mags and then the rest of the world will know.”

“I am texting Vilde as soon as I end this call.”

“Wow you’re such a good friend.” I murmur dryly and sarcastically even though she technically is a good friend that’s spending her hard earned short break on a video call with me when she could be resting after another typical tiresome day of never-ending doctor duties. “Tip your phone a little. I want to see what you’re wearing.” Sana asks.

I begrudgingly comply because my friendship with Sana is very similar to my working relationship with Even where there is little room for saying no to anything.

Sana makes an approving noise. “Your boss has good taste. I like.”

I tip my phone back up and sit down at the edge of my bed. “Thanks. It’s good to know I’m dressed impeccably for a boring evening.”

Sana raises her eyebrows at me. “Even is boring? That’s new.”

“Not him. I mean the managing director at the company. I’m in for a lot of business talk tonight.”

“So your boss asked you to join him for a business dinner and told you how to dress?” Sana chortles. “I’ve always heard that a man’s assistant or secretary is better than a wife. Isabel, you are a good and loyal wife.”

“Fuck that shit.”

Sana laughs. “Have fun.”

“I’m sure I won’t.”

“Thank your boss for getting you out of your apartment. Your life seems to be a serious bore these days since you are clinically single.”

“Well that last bit is true. Speaking of which, how are things with you and Yousef?”

“Good. As soon as I have some free time, we are going on vacation.”

“Nice. What destination?”

“We can’t decide between the Maldives and Hawaii.”

“Hawaii is a better choice.”

“I don’t understand the fascination with it.”

“How can you not? Sana, I know you’re not the type of person to go with the opinion of the masses, but Hawaii is super awesome. I want to go one day.”

“With Even?”

I frown, totally taken aback by the strange question. “Why would I go with my boss?”

“I just assumed, since you two do everything together.”

“At work.”

“You’re not working now.”

“Yeah but…. It’s a business dinner.”

“Of course.” Sana smiles until her dimples are showing. It’s the kind of smile that tells me she doesn’t agree at all. There is no time to argue because Even will arrive any second, so I let it go for today.

“Are you getting off work tonight?” I smoothly change the subject.

“It’s unlikely.” She leans forward and props her elbow up to rest her cheek on her hand. She looks tired all of a sudden and I really feel bad for her.

“Remember you are a hero.” I gently remind her, hoping to offer some sort of encouragement.

“Don’t be cheesy.” Typical Sana replies, but the tell-tale smile on her lips indicates she is happy to hear what just said.

“I’ll text you tomorrow.”

“You better. I want to hear about your date.”

“Business dinner.”

“Right.”

*********

Dinner with our MD, Jackson turns out to be something that could have been an email or in the very least a 5 minute phone call concerning tips on how to move our company forward. Then again I’m not surprised that Jackson literally made a meal of the issue. All of my father’s friends feel the need to _watch over me and help me_ , like they owed my father something.

With practiced ease, I manage to breezily get through the boring dinner, small talk and all even though I hate the bold dark brown colour palette of the lounge interior and the food isn’t exactly my taste. The highlight of the evening is that Isak is wearing the pleasant suit that I like and he has in place the hairstyle that goes with it.

Speaking of my assistant, he is on the quieter side this evening. I bet he is too busy pretending to enjoy the food. This would be a whole lot more fun without Jackson in the picture, and then Isak and I would savagely criticize the menu here.

By the good grace of the kind heavens, Jackson eventually leaves, announcing that _he has to run_ , whatever that means. I don’t care.

Minutes after Jackson has gone, Isak and I linger at the restaurant, drinking some more wine. God knows we need to wash out the bad taste of the food. I’ll never understand why Jackson likes this place so much.

I turn to Isak and ask, “How is the wine?”

“Its delicious.” he answers smoothly, and I realise he is still in his polite professional mode since this is a business dinner.

“And the food?”

“It’s also very delightful.” He smiles with his teeth and it’s almost convincing, but that’s only until I notice his eyes twitch.

“Relax. I know you hated it. I did too.”

Isak’s smile falls and he sighs deeply like a heavy load has been lifted off his shoulders. “I don’t think the eggplants on my plate were actual eggplants.”

I laugh at that. “What else could they be?”

“Something made in a lab?! You know, boss, I never thought I’d say this in my entire life, but this place is just too fancy.”

“I can’t wait to see what their desserts look like.”

“I can.”

“Shall we order?”

“No.” he vehemently rejects the suggestion. “May I suggest a place where we can actually eat a good dessert? It’s not far from here. It’s a short walk.”

**********

I will mark this as the first and last time I trust Isak when he gauges distances. For far too long He and I have been walking through the streets to a destination he hasn’t disclosed. My hands are stuffed deep in my coat pockets to keep warm, but the same can’t be said for my face which is burning from the cold air.

“Please tell me we are almost there.” I glance at Isak and a grin slowly spreads across his face. I think he’s been expecting me to complain. Am I that predictable?

“Yes we are. The stars are out tonight. Try to enjoy the little special things of life.”

“Stars?” I scoff. “I think I haven’t looked at the sky in years.” Actually I’m not exaggerating. I can’t remember the last time I glanced at the sky.

“Then take a look now.” Isak looks up at me and then unceremoniously halts his footsteps, forcing me to do the same. “Go on, look up.” He tells me.

“Fine.” I breathe out tiredly and lift my gaze to the sky. Maybe it’s because this is something I haven’t done in a while, but I initially get a tiny dizzy spell which thankfully passes quickly. The second thing that happens is that the entirety of the sky feels overwhelming with the multitude of stars up there. It looks so vast but as my eyes adjust, the sight stars to look pleasant.

I peer down at Isak and he is looking at the sky as well with a small smile playing on his lips. I look at the sky again, then back at Isak and wonder whether the sight is that impressive. Then again I’m not a stars kind of guy, so I guess I’ll never understand. I will admit however that the sight isn’t atrocious. I mean both the stars and the serene expression on Isak’s face. Could I possibly find joy in something so small and simple? A part of me kind of feels envious of Isak’s ability to find joy so easily.

Isak’s gaze suddenly comes back to me and at my first instinct is to turn mine away because I’ve been caught staring. To avoid further embarrassment, I fight that instinct and maintain my gaze on him. He raises his eyebrows at me with askance, and I just shake my head. He shrugs and looks back at the sky.

“So, what do you think?” he asks

“I’m thinking the sky is quite nice, but I’d like to eat my dessert now.” I reach out and clamp my hands over Isak’s shoulders to stir him towards the direction we are headed and then I give him a gentle push forward. “Let’s go.”

*********

Isak takes me to a very cosy coffee and pastry house run by a nice old lady he appears to be very familiar with. She greeted us so warmly when we walked in and went on to promise Isak a free pastry of his choice. The place smells like warm chocolate cake, steaming cups of coffee and happiness. I haven’ been to a place like this in….

Well I haven’t been to a place like this at all. It’s not too shabby at all. I kind of like the earthy feel they have going on with the simply carved all brown wood furniture. Isak and I sit across each other at a two-seater table and a friendly waitress- whose name tag reads _Miriam_ \- comes to our table to take our orders.

“Hi, Isak. Good to see you again.” She smiles at my assistant before turning to me with her bright smile never waning. “Welcome to you too.”

“Thank you.” I reply.

Miriam’s attention goes back to Isak. “The usual?”

“Yes please.”

“What’s your usual, Isak?” I interrupt, curious.

“Camomile tea and dark chocolate dipped fruit. They serve the best here.”

“That sounds very….healthy.” my gaze slides back to Miriam. “Give me a piece of the juiciest chocolate cake you have and a latte.”

Mirriam takes note and walks away after promising to return soon.

I look around the place, taking in the ambience once more and soaking it in. “I haven’t been to place like this since college.”

“Are you complaining about the place?”

“If I had any complaints, I wouldn’t be sitting down.”

“I have a complaint.”

“Yes? You shouldn’t be drinking coffee and eating so much sugar this late in the evening or you’ll have trouble sleeping.”

“I need the few waking hours at home to work on something.”

“Alright, but make sure you also get a good night’s sleep. You have gym at 7am and an appointment with your therapist at 8:30 tomorrow morning.”

“What about you? When is your next doctor’s appointment?”

“Why do you ask?”

“You look exhausted.” If the dark circles under his eyes get any darker, his eyes will disappear. I’ve noticed he is a little sluggish at work as well these days and that’s very unlike him. “I positively think you’ll become less grumpy once you start sleeping better.”

“Sleeping? My friends have a whole different solution for my grumpiness.” He says, rolling his eyes and then he freezes abruptly as if what he just said is belatedly sinking in. he looks at me wide-eyed and my lips slowly stretch into a knowing smirk, especially as his cheeks get notably redder. I don’t think he intended to overshare. And this is why he needs to rest. Clearly he isn’t in his right mind right now.

I still can’t resist teasing him a bit. “If your friends’ suggestion works better for you then go for it. Just get some sleep as well afterwards.”

“Please stop.” He groans, lowering his gaze.

After enjoying a good laugh at Isak’s expense, “for God’s sake get rid of your doctor and start seeing a different one.” I tell him with a more serious tone. This is something we’ve been talking about for a while.

“I will.”

“You keep saying that. I didn’t realise that you have enough money to waste on a doctor who isn’t helping you. Psychologists are expensive.”

Isak sighs tiredly, looking badgered and harassed. That only irks me more. Why am I the bad guy when I’m only trying to help?

I always get this heavy feeling in my chest whenever he looks at me like I should just mind my own business and leave him the hell alone.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” Isak is regarding me irately. 

“Because you’re forcing me to nag.”

“Then don’t.”

“You won’t listen if I don’t.”

Isak makes a grimace. “What do you want me to say?”

“Promise me that you’ll get better help.”

“Will you really be happy with a promise?”

“So far you haven’t given me a reason not to trust in your promises.”

“Alright, Even. I promise.”

“Good.” I can finally let the issue rest so that we can hopefully lift the tension and go back to our light conversation. “Now I’m ready for my sugar fix. What’s taking my chocolate cake so long? The service here is terrible.” 

Isak shakes his head at me. “You’re such a child.” at least he’s smiling again. That’s all the proof I need that our petty quarrel from a moment ago is officially behind us.

*********

The next day after his therapist appointment, Even is trapped in meeting after meeting all mid-morning, so I’m not left with much work to do. I take this time to see Vilde about my overtime pay issues.

She’s alone in the office when I get there. Apparently her assistant is out running some errands.

“Take a seat.” Vilde invites me, all-business smile in place. She can be uptight outside of work too, but that’s only reinforced here where we are in an actual cooperate setting. I’m not complaining.

“Thanks.” I sit down across her.

“What can I do for you?”

“Even says you should evaluate my salary rate and see if it’s adequate.”

“Any reason why?”

“I’ve been putting in a lot of overtime, as you know.”

Vilde nods. “I’ll do that. I’m aware of the number of hours you have to put in as an assistant. It can’t be easy. Sana told me you were out on a business dinner with Even last night.”

“Wow, she really did gossip.” I murmur, stunned. “Yeah it was the usual. Jackson needed to give Even some advice.”

“Jackson our MD? Why couldn’t they talk here?”

“My thoughts exactly.”

Vilde smiles suddenly. “I know it’s all work related, but I’m just happy that something is getting you out of your apartment on week nights. I’m really worried about your dwindling social life, Isak.” Her scolding tone is back. She gets this way sometimes when she means to drive a point across.

“All our friends have moved away, Vilde. Only you, Mags and I are left here in Oslo. Third wheeling all the time with you guys isn’t fun.” I reason with her

“Then get your dating life back on track.” She shrugs like that’s the answer to the problem. “We can double date.”

“eww, no. besides, I’m not that bad. I do visit our friends whenever I can. I was at Eskild’s for the weekend a few weeks ago, remember? After that I visited Eva to see her new apartment and meet her new boyfriend.”

“Okay so you’re trying. All I’m saying is that you can do better right here in Oslo. The truth is that as we get older it’s getting harder and harder to create time to visit each other. You need to find some company right where you are.”

“I feel like this is a conversation you and Mags have before going to bed.”

Vilde gives me an odd look, “we do talk about you, but not in our bedroom. Don’t be creepy.”

I laugh at how disgusted she looks. “I hear you, Vilde.” I gently pacify her with practiced ease. My mother is very much actively trying to get me laid; she’s been setting me up on dates here and there.”

“Get serious and pick someone to go steady with already.”

“I’ll work on that.”

She shakes her head while giving me a dirty look. It’s like she can see right through my lies. “I wish your social skills were as good as your professional ones.”

******

The next two weeks are hell for me because we’ve finally found one great potential investor from Italy. They are even willing to help us launch a new product within the next 6 months. The issue is that they are also demanding that we restructure the Golden Gates and hire a new accounting team. This after the demanded we close our Trondheim subsidiary on grounds that it is unprofitable. Firstly, I trust my current accounting team and have no problem with them. Secondly, closing an entire subsidiary right now could get messy because Golden Gates is a bit back in salary payments.

I am in the middle of endless back to back meetings with the operation team, the director of accounting, the head of PR, and the potential investors themselves. Isak has been of great help replacing me where I can’t be, but apparently that’s not enough either. According to Isak, some of my workers have taken issue with how busy I am.

Isak and I have been in Trondheim all morning in a meeting with the workers at the workers at the subsidiary over there. It was an exhausting back and forth about a solution that can benefit management and the workers. We are finally back in Oslo and Isak is driving me from the airport back to the office as he tells me about how he overheard some ladies from the PR department complaining about how unethical it was of me to send my assistant to the employee of the month celebration dinner.

It is a policy my father came up with that every employee of the month gets the opportunity to have dinner with some top managers in order to increase interaction and bridge the gap between management and employees.

I drop my head back against the headrest of the backseat and close my eyes. I’m so tired. “I ought to change some of these traditions my father left.” I mutter after some time when I’ve found the strength to lift my head and speak.

Isak glances at me through the rear view mirror. “You can’t. The workers will chew your head off. Your father’s traditions are beloved.”

“I just can’t win, can I?”

Isak is silent for a while, his gaze trained on the road. It’s impossible to see what he is thinking and decipher why he is suddenly quiet, so I just leave him be. He speaks back up after so long that I get a little startled by the abrupt sound amidst the silence in the car. “I know you’re exhausted, but hang in there. Gossip is normal in companies. It’s literally impossible for workers to be happy with management. There is always a problem.”

“Being the bad guy is exhausting.”

“I don’t think you’re a bad guy.”

I look at the rear view mirror and find that he is smiling at me. My lips curve up in a small smile. “At this point you’re the only person who isn’t secretly plotting my murder.”

“You’re welcome.” Isak replies good naturedly

My phone rings and its Gary calling. _Again._ For goodness’ sake is someone dying? Perhaps I’ve ignored his calls enough in the past 48 hours. Brining my phone to my ear, “Yes?” I answer.

“Fucking finally. Are you ignoring my calls?”

_Of course_. It’s natural to ignore someone’s calls after you you’ve broken up with them. “What do you need?” I ask impatiently

“Some of your time. Can we talk in person?”

I peer down at my wrist watch and it says 12:51. I have a meeting at 2pm and lunch some time before that. “Is it urgent?”

“Sort of.”

“Is it something we can discuss under 30 minutes?”

“That’s fair.”

“Then let’s meet at Tim Wendelboe coffee shop in 10 minutes. I’m already close by.”

“Will do.” Gary agrees and hangs up.

“Isak, please drive me to Tim Wendelboe café. I need to meet with Gary.”

“Gary Haugen?”

“Yes. He says it’s urgent.”

Isak doesn’t comment and probably it’s for the best.

********

“We both know how things ended with Gary. Stay alert in case anything happens in there.” I say to Isak when we arrive at the coffee shop.

“I’ll keep an eye out for a screaming man. My gun is loaded and ready.” He says with a cheeky smile and I shoot him a sarcastic grin.

********

Inside the shop, I naturally go to the back to my usual table and thankfully it’s free. I’ve been here alone a few times and I like the place a lot for its wood and bare-brick espresso bar with on-site micro-roastery and its choice of high quality coffees.

Out of nowhere I start wondering if Isak would like a place like this. Admittedly this place is a lot less cosy compared to the place he took me to a few weeks ago. While I’m chewing on that thought, a polite waiter whose name tag reads ‘Aksel’ walks over to take my order.

My ice Americano comes in under 3 minutes and much to my relief, I don’t wait very long for Gary to arrive.

The coffee shop isn’t that busy yet, so he spots me easily and walks over to my table.

“Hi, Even.” He says with surprising civility. I don’t know, but it’s making me uncomfortable.

“Hi.” I reply, rather tightly. Gary looks as great as I remember, always dressed to impress in a grey suit, no tie, and dark hair pushed back from his forehead as usual. I suppose a man’s style can’t change much in 4 months.

Aksel comes back to take Gary’s order.

“I’ll have what he’s having.” Gary points at my drink. Aksel nods and leaves.

Gary’s undivided attention is on me now. “You look good.” He gives me a quick once over.

“Thanks, you too.” Whether he is bullshitting me or not, my compliment is genuine.

“Thank you. I understand you are a busy man, so I’ll get to the point. I need a date to an art exhibition tonight.”

“Why me?”

Gary shrugs. “Why not?”

“You’ll have to do better than that.”

He appears to reconsider and sits up, clasping his hands at the table. “Alright. The truth is that I stand to win a sweet car if I take you. I made a bet with my friends that whoever lands at the exhibition with the hottest guy or girl wins the car. I’m hot and all, but I can’t find a hot date at such short notice, so I turned to my exes and apparently you’re the best looking one. Congratulations.”

I just stare at Gary in shock and honestly indignation as well. Seriously this is the nonsense he’s been calling me non-stop about for 2 whole days? It’s all about a stupid bet with his friends? Now I have to live the rest of my life knowing that I made time in my busy schedule for this shit.

“You’re rich. Can’t you just buy a car?” I reason, finally finding my ability to speak.

Aksel brings Gary’s drink and asks if we’d like anything else. We both say no and he goes about his other tasks.

Gary continues. “Yeah, but my parents are watching my spending these days.” he wrinkles his nose disdainfully. “I’ve been driving the same beat up Audi for 2 months now. Every day. Can you imagine the embarrassment?”

“Yes, what agony.” I deadpan

“So, will you accompany me?”

“Okay. Is your assistant available then?”

“No.” apparently there is something about my response that makes Gary’s eyebrows rise again and there is a tiny smile playing on his lips. It’s like he knows something I don’t. It’s such an irritating sight. 

“He’ll be working on a Thursday night?”

“No, but I’m not making him go on a date with you.”

“You had no problem getting him to dump me on your behalf. Certainly you don’t mind him going on a date with me, in your place.”

The crass reminder of what went down between me and Gary renders me speechless for a moment during which I suffer a fresh wave severe regret and embarrassment. The only thing I can think to utter is an apology. “I was a jerk. Again, I’m sorry.”

“I didn’t say that because I want an apology from you. I’m just asking a favour because you owe me.”

“I still don’t think that’s such a good idea.”

“Then may I borrow your assistant? He is just as good looking as you are.”

“Isak isn’t available.” I snap maybe a little too tetchily because I’m suddenly irritated by Gary’s insistence. For goodness’ sake Isak has nothing to do with this mess.

“Oh. Judging by your reaction, I guess he is your man now.”

“What? No.” what reaction is he talking about?

His eyebrows shoot up in surprise. “No?” he pauses, looking like he is thinking of something. “Did I read that all wrong?”

“Read what?”

“The two of you are so close.” Gary’s tone is dripping with suggestion.

“He is my assistant. Of course we are close.”

“I have an assistant too. We are not that close.”

“That’s too bad for you.” It’s not the first time someone has misunderstood my relationship with Isak, and now I have to wonder what it is about mine and Isak’s business relationship that people mistake for a romantic one.

Gary grins and thankfully reverts to the issue at hand. “We’ll barely be 4 hours at the exhibition. Just help me out?”

I suppose that doesn’t sound too bad. “After this I don’t owe you anything.”

“Of course. I’m not even mad at you anymore.”

********

“Happy to see you alive and well.” Isak sasses some more as he opens the car door for me.

I just roll my eyes at him and enter the car. He doesn’t say anything until we are back amidst moving traffic. “Was the meeting a success?”

“Gary guilt-tripped me into going on a date with him tonight because according to a bet he made with his friends, he stands to win a car if he turns up to some event tonight with a hot guy on his arm. Apparently I’m that guy now.”

Isak briefly peeks at me in the rear view mirror with a look on his face that clearly gives away his effort not to laugh out loud. “On the bright side, he is saying you’re the hottest guy in Oslo.”

“…That he can find on short notice.” I roll my eyes, irritated. I think I see Isak’s lips twitch and I frown huffily at him.

“Not to rub it in or anything, but I did tell you that sending me to break up with him was a bad move.”

“It was a low point in my life, I admit it. Can we please move on now?”

“You never apologised.”

“I just did. I hope Gary gets over everything for real this time.”

“I mean to me.” Isak patiently corrects.

Oh. Silence fills the car as I swiftly feel awkward and just flat out bad. I suppose it’s better late than never. “Sorting out my romantic issues is not part of your job description. I’m sorry for putting you in an uncomfortable position.”

“Can we agree that I won’t have to do something like that ever again?”

“Yes we can agree on that.”

“Okay.” It’s a single word, but Isak sounds satisfied. And speaking of bad relationship matters, “By the way Emma called me to claim the promise I made to her at the charity event.”

“What promise?” I can’t see Isak’s face but I can tell he has a sour look on his face considering how vexed he sounds all of a sudden.

“I promised to help her date you, remember?”

“That one is on you. I didn’t make the promise.”

“You’re just going to toss me to the wolves like that?”

“Take is as my revenge for making me dump Gary on your behalf. If you get rid of Emma for me, I’ll officially say we’re even.”

“That incident has earned me a lot of relationship-related favours today.” I complain with a sigh, taking my phone out of my breast pocket to text Emma.

Isak isn’t having it though. “The biggest rule of being in a relationship is _don’t-be-a-coward_.”

“Are you giving me relationship advice now? I thought you said my relationship stuff isn’t part of your job description.”

“You made it my business when you made me break up with Gary for you.”

“I get it for goodness’ sake.” I growl, just about sick of hearing that now; and Isak laughs. He actually laughs, at me, enjoying my pain. I don’t know whether to be offended or to join in on the laughter. After all I was an idiot.

“Haven’t you ever been a coward in a relationship?”

“Of course I have.”

“Was your situation better than mine?”

“Worse. My lies ruined a good relationship my two best friends had. Let’s just say my journey to coming out wasn’t smooth.”

It’s the first time Isak is candidly telling me about something so personal. Of course we’ve offhandedly had discussions about love and relationships, but Isak kept things pretty undetailed and incomprehensive every time, as did I. At first it was probably to maintain a professional atmosphere between us as is only right, and then we just weren’t close enough to share that deeply. I suppose we are getting closer now. I’m okay with that.

“Is this friend Jonas?”

“How do you know?”

“You talk about him a lot.”

“Do I? Anyway yes I mean Jonas. It’s all water under the bridge now.”

“That’s good to hear. Did you… have romantic feelings for Jonas?” I tentatively ask, uncertain about what right I have to pry that far. Isak surprises me by easily answering the question without fanfare.

“I did. That’s what caused a mess. I liked him, so I sabotaged his relationship with Eva.”

“What’s love without being the bad guy at some point?!”

“Indeed.”

“Do you still like him? Jonas I mean.”

“I’m over it now.”

For some reason this confirmation sits very well with me.

“It’s good to hear that everything is okay between the two of you now.”

“It’s a relief I tell you.” He smiles and then totally changing the subject, he adds. “I’ll call your stylist to arrange for a suit for that exhibition tonight.”

“Thanks.” There is a smile on my face because I’m impressed by how easily Isak and I can comfortably move from personal to professional.

********

“Sorry, but someone needs to hold the fort at the office. I need to go to the office.” This is my last effort to try and get out of shopping for a suit with Even. He has his stylist’s help for goodness’ sake. Why does he need me here as well?

“You don’t look sorry.” Even notes

“I’m not. I’ll take a taxi and you can drive yourself to the office when you’re done here.”

“We won’t be long.” Even takes my wrist and drags me into the establishment, ignoring my protests. This is so not how I want to spend my lunch hour.

Inside the store, Caroline- Fashion retailer and Even’s stylist of over a year- welcomes us with her usual brand of business savvy friendliness then she leads us to the executive fitting room for her VIP clients. She already has a selection of suits waiting for Even to try out.

I can already feel the boredom creeping in. It’s going to take forever for Even to pick something out.

As anticipated, he asks my opinion with each suit he tries on. The tension and dull ache in my shoulders suggests that I’m just about tired of helping him put on his shirts, ties and jackets. Caroline’s job is so hard. I’ll respect her in the future. Even had only tried one suit on when she got called out to the retail section to sort something out and she left me in charge of helping Even out until she returns.

“You seem tense.” Even says to my reflection in the mirror while I’m standing behind him and helping him pull a jacket on.

“I’m hungry and my shoulders hurt.”

“Oh?” He furrows his eyebrows and turns around to face me. “Do you need a break?”

Whatever I’m about to say skitters away from my mind as Even haphazardly reaches out to clamp his hands over my shoulders, and then he presses down, digging in.

It’s so sudden and _unusual_ , so I tense up and swallow thickly as my heartbeat quickens probably from the shock. That’s until he smiles down at me, telling me to relax. The right effect does set in when I let my body relax and will the thundering beat of my heart to calm down. The pressure actually feels good.

Except it’s also a bit awkward because I’m directly facing Even and I can only imagine what kind of faces I’m making in my effort not to purr like adman cat. Even appears to be holding in his laughter, so it must be quite a sight. 

“Better?” he asks after a while.

The word ‘no’ is at the tip of my tongue because I’m still very much enjoying Even’s hands working the tension in my shoulders away. Then again nothing good lasts forever. “Yes, much. Thanks.”

Even’s hand slide away almost immediately much to my chagrin. I know Even is a nice guy, but I didn’t know he is this nice. It’s good to know.

He turns back around towards the mirror to look at his reflection. “What do you think of this suit?”

“It looks as good at the last 6 you tried on.”

“I need to look my very best.”

“For Gary or for the exhibition?”

“Maybe both. No one wants to look shabby in front of their ex.”

Maybe it’s the hunger that’s making me cranky but his answer just grazes on my already irritated nerves. 

“You look good in anything.” I mutter dryly. What the fuck does it matter what Even looks like in front of Gary anyway. He wasn’t exactly the best boyfriend when they were together. All this fuss is so not worth it.

“You always say that, and I hear you but he is relying on me to bring my extra good looks and charm tonight.”

“You look your best.” I snap and Even whirls around, stunned by my outburst. I clear my throat, embarrassed and regretful. “Sorry.”

“Are you okay?”

“I’m fine. It’s just….” I trail off to find the right way of saying this without showing any more of the annoyance I’m feeling inside. “I’ve been helping you pick out your clothes for a while. I think you should trust my opinion more.”

Even gives me a nervous little laugh and pats me on the arm. “I didn’t mean to upset you. I’m sorry. We’ll give it a rest now then. And I do trust you. Always.”

“Thank you.” I do genuinely feel a little better hearing him say that. “We should really have lunch now if you expect to make it for your 2pm meeting.”

“Right.” He snaps his fingers as if just remembering that we haven’t eaten.

“What would you like to eat? I’ll go out and get it while you finish up here.”

*********

Apparently Caroline did return to help Even while I was out buying lunch and now she is nice enough to let us have lunch in her office while she is packing up Even’s purchases. We settle on the couch in her office to eat.

“I just told Emma that you’re seeing someone else now and you’re sorry things couldn’t work out between the two of you.”

“What did she say?”

Even unceremoniously takes my sandwich from my hand and takes a bite, making a face right after. “How do you eat this?”

I huffily pick up his salad from the table and hand it to him, taking my sandwich back. “I manage just fine. “What did Emma say?”

“That she’ll believe it when she sees it.”

“Oh my God. What’s wrong with her?” I’m so appalled by the girl’s persistence.

“This tastes good. I think you’ll like it.” Even gestures at his salad with the plastic fork in his hand.

“Do you think?” I peer sceptically at it. Even picks up a bit of the salad with his fork and brings it to my mouth. I take the bite and chew very slowly. He’s right thought; it does taste good. Maybe even better than my roast chicken breast sandwich.

“What do you think?”

“It tastes good.” I nod my approval. “So Emma won’t leave me alone unless she sees me dating some else?”

“Exactly.”

I shake my head in exasperation. “Anyway, do you think we can comply with the demands of our new potential investor?”

“After talking to the workers in Trondheim, I don’t think it’s wise to immediately close down the subsidiary. I’ll try to find a way to negotiate some of the demands.”

“The director of finance says that if we don’t find a proper investor in 7 months’ time, the bank will officially start the first stage of Golden Gates bankruptcy.”

Even puts his food away and sighs distraughtly. “I know.”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to put you in a bad mood.”

“It’s not your fault.”

“You should finish your food. The rest of the day ahead is long.”

He gives me a really long schooling look. “How about you? Are you sleeping better these days? You still look tired.”

I really dislike it when Even brings that up, but I try not to let that show now. “I did get rid of my doctor.”

“And you are seeing a new one?”

“Not yet. I’m looking into it.” I can only hope this is enough to dismiss the topic.

Even nods and appears to be thinking so seriously about something. At least he doesn’t ask me any more about my insomnia, and he silently goes back to eating his food.

“I’ll finish up quickly here and go talk to Caroline before we leave.” I announce.

“About what?”

“Earlier I asked her to help me pick out a blazer for church. My mother insists that I need a new one.”

For some reason that seems to put Even in such a good mood that he is now grinning at me. “Your mother is giving you fashion advice?”

I nearly roll my eyes, but stop myself in time with the reminder that Even is my boss. “She is apparently tired of seeing me in grey jackets and black jackets. I consulted Caroline on what colours would suit me best.”

“What did she suggest?”

“Orange.” My nose wrinkles at the idea

Even laughs out loud. “I must say I can’t wait to see you in an orange coloured jacket.”

“There is no way I’m wearing that.”

“Then let me help you pick out some nice white and black colours.”

“Thank you.” I sigh in relief because as much as I dislike white and black jackets, it sounds better than showing up to church looking like a fucking pumpkin.

*******

My evening is complete and I’m ready for bed after a lean steak dinner, a shower and a video call with Jonas to discuss our vacation plans together in Portugal one day when we both cash in our vacation days.

Once I’m well under the covers, I grab my book on the nightstand and turn to the page I’m on. I’ve never liked reading so of course I didn’t consciously go out to look for a book to read. Eva recommended this saying it’s a great read. I believe she also droned on about how I need to take more interest in literary art because it’s good for my vocabulary. I wasn’t really listening. In the end I only agreed to read the book because I was hoping it’s something that would help me fall asleep at night.

Unfortunately for me the book is a lukewarm midpoint between a horror and a thriller and it’s not even boring enough to put me to sleep. I swear I’ve been reading from page 12 to 18 for 3 weeks, maybe longer.

I’ve barely read three paragraphs when my phone vibrates on the nightstand, and it reach for it. It’s a text from Even.

_Even: call me right now and say there is an emergency at the office_

Undoubtedly this means Even is in desperate need of an escape plan. He’s asked for my help in this way several times. The whole thing isn’t even as funny as it used to be the first few times he did it. 

_Me: It’s 9pm. I doubt that’ll be believable._

_Even: I don’t care. I’ve done my part and Gary has probably won his damned car. Now, get me the hell out of here._

_Me: aren’t you having fun? I thought the pretentious artsy environment would suit you well._

_Even: You would think. I don’t know anyone here, the art on display is dreadful and I’m not in a socialising mood. Everyone keeps asking where Gary and I are back together. I need to escape without being rude. I’ve wrong the guy enough in the past._

My fingers linger hesitantly on the keyboard as I consider the appropriateness of asking what I’m dying to know. I don’t even know why I care so much about Even getting back together with Gary. It just bothers me. There has been a dull ache in my chest since this afternoon when Even had coffee with the guy.

Even is open with me, so I suppose he’ll let me know if I’m crossing the line with my question.

_Me: are you and Gary back together?_

_Even: no. for goodness’ sake, get me out of here._

I find myself smiling, satisfied by his answer. Even has never given me reason to mistrust him, so he must be telling me the truth.

_Me: I’ll call you shortly. Hang in there_

_Even: what would I do without you? Remind me to show my gratitude later_

There is a part of me that feels burdened by how much Even relies on, and yet again there are times like now when I surprise myself by feeling weirdly gratified when he reminds me of how much he needs me. 


	4. Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 4 is here with some progress in that we get to know a little more about Even's personal life and relationships. Also, Evak have their first kiss. 
> 
> I'm really drawing a lot of motivation and inspiration from all the readers following this story, especially those leaving me comments. Thank you very much. love you all>3  
> I hope you'll love this chapter as much as the previous ones.

At exactly 10AM the next day, Isak walks into my office with a tray in his hands. “I brought your 10 o’clock medicine, wild berry yogurt and fruit salad.” He announces as he makes his way to my desk to put the tray down.

“Thank you, Isak.” I smile up at him, eager to have my healthy drink. Yougurt is the one thing Isak insists I drink every day, which I actually enjoy.

“Are you ready to play tennis with Mr Pedersen this afternoon?”

My mood comes crushing down instantly at the thought of engaging in a dreaded sport with a man I dislike so much. It is bad enough I’ve barely had a moment to go out and get some air since6am this morning because I have tons of sales forecasts to look at. At this point a bunch of numbers and graphs are just flying around in my head, but as desperate I as for a break, spending time with Jakob Pedersen is not exactly the break I want.

Jakob is the chairman of a Logistics company called Seymour and Fredrick, a trade partner of ours. The man was also one of my late father’s good friends. He visited our home a lot when I was a child. I assume He wants to see me just to ask how things are going over here. I don’t understand why he can’t just email me.

“I know you wish he could just call and email.” Isak says, doing the creepy thing he does where he reads my mind too well.

“Is that so hard?”

Isak smiles, “He is a sweet man who just wants to see you in person and make sure you’re okay. He hasn’t seen you since that incident with Sonja.”

I suppose Isak has a point. The now so-called Sonja incident happened 8 months ago and it’s only normal for Jakob to want to see me.

“Alright I’ll go, but you’re coming with me.”

Isak’s victorious smile is short lived, and it quickly getting replaced with a grimace. “Why?” he asks me.

“Jakob’s wife will probably be there as well and together they’ll badger me about why I’m still single. If I have some company, they’ll be too embarrassed to talk about stuff like that.”

“Even….” Isak is visibly floundering for a way to get out of this, but my mind is made up and I give him a look that says as such. I love it when I can flash my boss card at him.

He appears to concede but continues glaring indignantly at me.

“What is it, Isak? You were so happy a little ago.” I purposely tease him because I enjoy getting a rise out of him sometimes.

“This isn’t fair.” He protests in a I’m-getting-really-tired-of-you kind of way, but I disregard that.

“My pain is your pain as well.” without waiting for a reply, I search my desk for a document and when I find the right one, I hand it to Isak. “This is our contact with Onekey Advertising. Take it to legal and have them review it. I need their feedback by tomorrow morning in time for the meeting with OneKey’s representative.”

“Yes, Sir.” He mutters through clenched teeth. It’s obvious he’s holding himself back from giving me another earful about my unhealthy attachment to his company. Maybe he is right and it’s not healthy, but I have enough worries on my mind right now without adding my ever dwindling social life to the list.

“Cheer up. It’s not that bad.”

“I know I’m going to hate every second of it.”

“Let’s not think too much about what happens when we get there. Minute by minute, remember?”

“right.” he deadpans, much to my delight.

********

Stella Pedersen is a very nice lady who appreciates garden gnomes, animals and good tapper wear. None of that interests me at all, so making small talk with her while her husband and Even are out back playing tennis, is very painful for me. She totally makes up for that though by serving the best tea I’ve tasted yet. Also, one can never get used to how beautiful her home is.

She and I are seated opposite each other at a small table in the garden, drinking tea and chit chatting about her last visit to a rabbit farm.

There is a short silence after which she asks me decides to start asking me some pretty standard questions. “How are things at the office these days? Is Even still struggling?”

“I’m afraid so. We are doing our best though.” I rush to assure her when her concern flickers across her face.

“You know I’m glad that Even has someone like you helping him out. I can tell that you’re very competent.”

“Thank you.” I brighten at the compliment.

“I wish he could date someone like you.”

“e-excuse me?” I inelegantly splutter, not at all prepared to hear something like this.

Polite smile in place, she blinks at me like she is genuinely wondering why I’m so flustered. Seriously how can she not know how strange it is to say something like that? What the hell am I supposed to say back?

“I...well there are plenty of nice people out there. Even will find someone.” I literally walked up to Gary and told him to the face that his relationship with Even was over, but not even that comes close to how uncomfortable it is for me discussing Even’s personal life with Stella - a parent figure.

I’m beginning to see why Even avoids one-on-one conversations with the woman. Even won’t give her an audience and now she is badgering me.

“Are you seeing someone yourself?” she is asking

My mouth opens and closes then opens again as I flounder for a response. Stella grins, appearing to be aware of my discomfort. “I’m sorry. Does the question make you uncomfortable?”

“Yeah.” I mutter quietly and take another sip of my tea. Fuck her delicious sweet tea. This is some bullshit.

“Let me rephrase my question. Are you available?”

How the fuck is this question any better than or different from the last?

“I’m…. actively dating.”

Stella beams like I’ve just announced wedding news. “That’s great. Can you help Even find someone?”

“How?” I blink at her honestly wondering. Actually I’m starting to get just a bit curious about how far Stella’s nosiness can go.

“You are a nice and stand up guy, so I’d assume you know other people with nice personalities such as yours. As we all know, Even has been….around.” the last word is muttered tightly like it’s painful for her to say. I almost laugh at how agonised she looks on the face. She’s acting like an ashamed mother. “I’d really be happy if he found someone who can take good care of him, like you do.”

“Sorry but I have no time to interview or train potential lovers for my boss.”

Stella’s smile falls and she purses her lips at me, probably not appreciating my lack of corporation.

“I’m serious, Isak.” She snaps with an alarming level of seriousness. “Even is not getting any younger.” 

“He is only 30 years old.”

“30 too old, right? How old are you, Isak?”

“28.”

“Then you’re also at a good age to settle down. If you’re looking to marry, don’t look too far. Sometimes a good thing is right under your nose.” She punctuates that with a wink and a suggestive smirk. It’s hard to believe she seemed mad just a few moments ago.

I gape in awe of her audacity. Is this s joke? Even and I have visited here a few times, and in the past and it became agonisingly clear to me that Stella is nosy and overwhelming but this is a whole new level. She has never come down on me about this dating business.

“Stella, I’m not going to enter a romantic relationship with my boss.”

“Even has some issues here and there as do we all, but he is such a sweetheart.”

“I know that. Please accept my answer, which is no. I don’t want to get involved in Even’s personal life. Please understand.”

“Fine.” She sighs, resigned. “All I’m saying is that you two would be good together. You seem to make Even happy and that’s something he rarely is around other people.”

********

Eventually Even and Jakob join Stella and I in the garden after their tennis match. I stand up to greet them both. “How was the game?” I ask

“It was fun.” Jakob says, leaning down to give his wife a kiss on the cheek.

“For you maybe. You won.” Even sulkily replies and I have told back my laughter at how sore he looks. I reach up and carefully untangle the towel from around his neck and use it to dab the sweat off his face and his neck.

“I’m sure you did your best.” I supportively tell him.

“I’m out of practice that’s all. I’m thinking we should visit here every other Friday afternoon to play. It’s also great exercise.”

My hand halts about his chest. “we?”

“Yes. You and I.”

“I don’t play Tennis. You know that.”

“I can always teach you. I’m sure you’ll enjoy it.”

“You can come here and practice with me instead of forcing your poor assistant.” Jakob laughingly tells Even

“I agree. More reason for you to visit, Even.” Stella adds.

“Did you here that, Isak?” Even has a devilish smile on his face and I instantly get a bad feeling about what he’s about to say. “We’ve been invited to play tennis here every Friday.”

With three pairs of eyes on me, it’s impossible to glare at Even and argue like I really want to, so with a very pained smile, I nod. “Alright.”

“Great.” Jakob smiles so victoriously like he has just won some prize. His wife is the same. For a moment I’m touched by how much these people love Even. Their kindness as well and Stella’s nosiness is a bit suffocating, but warming at the same time.

Meanwhile Even is giving me a smirk that puts me under the impression that he knows I’ll give him an earful about this later, and that he is so ready for it.

I go back to wiping the sweat off Even’s chest. “You should take a shower now before you get a cold. Your shirt is nearly drenched in sweat.” I caution and then add without waiting for an answer. “I’ll go get your fresh clothes and cosmetics from the car.”

Stella stands up as well and points at Jakob and Even. “Indeed you two should clean-up for dinner. Let’s all meet in the parlour for a chat.”

*******

Jakob and Stella’s son Bruce joins us in the parlour while we are chatting and waiting for dinner. I rise to my feet to greet him because he always insists on giving me a big hug each time we meet. Bruce is a good guy I guess, but we’ve never been close. In fact we have close to nothing in common as we learned one horrid afternoon when we were 7 and our parents set up a play date for us. I remember both our parents being disappointed when we failed to hit it off, by thankfully everything was accepted gracefully. Bruce and I walked away from that with no hard feelings. That’s why to this day he can still greet me with a warm hug.

After pulling away, he holds me arm’s length and gives me a once over, “You look well, Even.”

“Thanks. So do you.” In truth, I’ve never seen Bruce looking less than impeccable. To begin with he has his mother’s slender frame and soft, pretty facial features. That coupled with his father’s blonde hair makes for a very beautiful man and Bruce is aware of that himself.

“How have you been?” he pulls me from my thoughts.

“I’m getting by.”

“How is everything at Golden Gates? I hear that things are still in bad shape.”

I have no reason to be dishonest with Bruce, so I easily come out with the truth. “We’re stressed but getting by. A day at a time. In fact-” I turn to my right to smile at Isak before bringing my gaze back to Bruce, “-minute by minute.”

Bruce grins, also sliding his gaze briefly to Isak and then back to me. “That’s nice.” He wiggles his eyebrows at me and I swear his grin is greasier than usual. Is he trying to tell me something?

Before I can ponder for too long, he leaves me to shake hands with Isak. “Isak, it’s nice to see you again. Welcome to our home.”

“Thank you. It’s always good to be here.”

Bruce goes to sit beside his mother.

“May I please be excused?” Isak asks. “I need to use the bathroom.”

“Of course, dear.” Stella answers him. “Go ahead.”

Isak gets up and leaves the room, not needing any assistance with directions since we’ve been here together twice before.

“Even.” Stella calls for my attention after Isak is out of sight. “I’m having our chef make us a leg of lamb dish for dinner.”

While the idea of eating lamb meat excites my taste buds, Isak might not appreciate that so much. I smile apologetically at Stella. “If it’s not too much trouble, could you serve the lamb dish on another day when I visit alone?”

“Why?” Stella’s excitement gets replaced with concern

“Isak doesn’t eat lamb meat.

“Well isn’t that just regrettable.” Jakob chuckles, looking amused. “He is missing out.”

Stella just stares at me for a few moments with her eyebrows raised, and her lips are twitching like she is holding back a smile, but I’m not sure what that means. “What does Isak like to eat then?” she finally asks after a while.

“Chicken breast.”

“I must say it’s awfully nice of you to make such a sacrifice for your assistant.” Stella says

“He’d do the same for me.”

“I don’t doubt that.” Her grin comes out in the open this time. “Then I’ll go and ask our chef to change the menu.”

“I apologise for any inconvenience.”

“Nonsense.” Stella literally waves my off apology. “You’re only being considerate. I’m happy to see that your assistant means so much to you.” She rises to her feet and then gives me a long, pointed, meaningful look. 

I look at Bruce and he is smiling knowingly as well.

Does these people know something I don’t?

*********

“By the way, Even, I’m in a King Lea play set for this Saturday night.”

Bruce announces well into dinner. I must say it’s a very welcome topic change from all the political and stock market talk that Jakob, Even and Stella have been going on about for the past 15 minutes or so. “You should come.” Bruce invites. He looks frankly excited by the idea of Even going to support him.

“Sure, I’ll swing by.” Even replies.

“Isak, you’re invited too.” Stella says and I pause mid-chewing, stunned.

“Oh. Thank you, but I have an engagement.”

Even looks at me then. “Shakespeare plays are very tantalizing. You should really come with.”

I throw Even a hard look. _I’m not going to see a boring ass Shakespeare play,_ I’m saying to him with my gaze.

 _And I’m not going alone,_ Even’s very huge, very fake smile retorts.

Before we’re done telepathically and wordlessly arguing with our eyes, Even unceremoniously turns his attention back to Bruce. “Isak and I will both be there.”

I smile warily at Bruce and simply nod because if I argue any more it’ll become clear that I’m just trying to avoid going to see the damned play. These people invited me to stay and take part in a delicious dinner, so I owe them my politeness at last. “Yes, I’ll be there.”

_I am going to kill Even Bech Naesheim._

“Wonderful.” Stella beams, by far looking the most excited about this, and she is also giving me a very pointed look that’s making me uncomfortable. “We’ll all go.”

Bruce turns to his mother and smiles ruefully at her. “I’m deeply sorry but you and dad aren’t invited.”

“What? Why?”

“Because it’s embarrassing to have my parents there. I love you, mum and I’m thankful for the care but no thanks.”

“That’s just highly unfair.” Stella turns to her husband. “Jakob, please talk to Bruce.”

Mother, father and son continue to bicker light heartedly as dinner progresses and I smile, nod and offer a comment here and there in all the right places just to be polite. Yet I’m somehow doing more talking than Even is. He unnaturally quiet all of a sudden. I steal a glance at him and find that he is quietly eating, eyes downcast. Something is wrong. I can feel the gloom emanating from him.

I wonder what has dulled his mood in such a short time.

********

It’s nearly 8pm by the time we leave the Pedersen home.

“Are you going home now?” Even asks me

“I need to get my work bag from the office. Are you going home?”

“There is some work to do at the office.” He is about to enter the car when my hand shoots out to grab his arm. He turns around and looks at me questioningly. 

“Are you alright?” I ask him

He nods slowly, eyeing me like he is wondering why I’m asking such a question.

“It’s just that you seem… a little sad.”

“I’m fine.” The smile he offers me is far too quick and dismissive for anything believable, but I let the issue go anyway. I’m sure he’s okay.

********

Even’s mood doesn’t improve on the way to the office, not even when I try to lighten the mood by telling him about how Stella is trying to hook us up. He smiles once at best.

At the office, he wordlessly walks straight to his, leaving me in the reception area to pick up my stuff. Peering down at my watch, the time reads 8:41 and I should really be leaving already because I need all the time in the world to force sleep.

Coat on and bag in my hand, I’m ready to leave but I just can’t employ my feet to mobilise towards the elevator. My brain is telling me to leave and everything else is pulling me towards Even’s office. I glance at his office door and something keeps weighing heavier and heavier on my chest.

I roll my eyes and growl irritably. I suppose I could check on him one last time. I swear I care too much.

**********

There is a knock on my office door just as I am pouring myself a drink at the mini bar. It must be Isak coming over to say goodbye before leaving.

“Come in.”

Indeed it’s Isak and he does look ready to leave what with his trench coat on and work bag clutched in his right hand. He approaches me and stops a few metres shy of my personal space. “Alright, boss, what’s wrong?” he asks, looking very impatient about it.

“Didn’t you already ask me this?”

“Look, it’s late and I’d like to go home and rest. Please spit it out already while I’m in a listening mood.”

I raise my eyebrows at him, eyeing his posture. Standing akimbo and huffing like a cute puppy, he doesn’t look interested in listening at all. “Then head home and get some rest.” I take two huge mouthfuls of my whisky.

Isak looks at me condescendingly. “I can’t leave you to drink alone with a troubled heart.”

I smile at him, feeling his care hit me in the chest. “You’re so nice.”

“Stop complimenting me and start talking.” Isak walks over the bar at last and he places his work bag on one of the stools. “Something happened at dinner with the Pedersens. One moment you were trading boring stock market secrets with Jakob and the next you were all solemn. What happened?”

“Shall I pour you a drink?”

“Are you about to start telling me some depressing stuff?”

“Yes.”

“Then pour me a whisky, double, on the rocks.”

Isak doesn’t press me for answers right away. We sip our whisky in silence for a little while before he demands that I start talking already.

“I just got jealous of Bruce.” I mutter with a heavy sigh

Isak knits his eyebrows at me. “Even, you’re attractive too.”

I grin. “I don’t mean jealous of his looks, but thank you.”

“Oh. Then I take that back.”

“No take backs. Anyway I meant that I got jealous of his family. He has parents that constantly nag and pamper him.”

“You want to be pampered and nagged?”

“Not exactly, but I just wish I had a better situation. My father cared more about Golden Gates than anything else, and my mother cares more about romantic love and money than her own child.”

“Has she been in touch recently?”

I shake my head. “Mum’s assistant told me that she is enjoying her honeymoon and is not to be disturbed.”

Isak visibly winces. “She’s been on her honeymoon for 5 months?”

Yes it’s ridiculous, I know. At this point it’s obvious that my mother is just avoiding me. “I know I should be over all that stuff by now-”

“No one ever really gets over things like that, Even. We all think it’s time to get over it because we’re grown now, but that’s not how it works. Grwoing up doesn’t take away any of the pain. I had a hard time for a while getting over my parents’ divorce.”

“You did?” this is definitely news to me. Isak has always seemed so strong, stronger than most people I know. He has always been a pillar for me in our hardest times together inside and outside this company. I guess I’m comforted in a way knowing that Isak is a regular guy who can relate to and understand my agony.

“Everyone has such struggles. They just pretend not to. You have the right to feel wronged by the way your mother treats you.”

“Thanks, Isak. I think I needed to hear that. I have no one to tell me that it’s okay.”

“Not even your friends?”

“Definitely not my friends.”

“How come?”

“Back in the day I had a huge falling out with my friends. We’ve reconciled and all now, but things are a bit awkward still. The distance doesn’t help. None of them stay in Oslo. We have reunions but everyone just pretty much lies about how great their life is.”

“You too?”

“Yes.”

Isak tips his head to the side and gives me a quizzical look. “Why? I mean your company isn’t doing so great, but you’re doing fine yourself. Your investments are flourishing; you have a healthy trust fund and nothing can take away the fact that you are a good businessman.” He reasons. 

“At the end of the day no one is happy with what they have I guess. We all want more in life and that’s what keeps us from appreciating what we already have.”

“That’s really sad.” He pauses to take a gulp of whisky. “But also very true.” He pauses again. “at least you have that nice cat of yours. I mean she is a bitch to everyone else, but she adores you.” 

My lips stretch into a smile. “Tulip likes you though.”

“Really?” Isak wrinkles his nose in doubt. “I guess I misread the signal when she scratched the back of my hand.”

“If she hated you, she would have gone straight for your eyes. Trust me I’ve seen it happen.”

He hisses and shudders. “In that case I’ll bring her a gift next time I drop in to feed her and take care of her litter box.”

“I think Tulip will appreciate that.” I smile at the thought and Isak smiles back at me.

“I’m happy to see you smiling again. Do you need a hug?” He puts his glass down and opens his arms invitingly even before I’ve given him an answer.

Of course I need a hug. I don’t know how Isak is so good at saying and doing the right things at the right time.

He steps up to me slowly and pulls me closer to him, wrapping his arms around me. Despite the heaviness in my chest and my stomach, I feel fluttered at the feeling of Isak’s body pressed against mine and I don’t hesitate to sink into the warmth he is offering.

This feels more soothing than I expected. I forgot how good it feels to just be held by someone who cares, someone who doesn’t judge or hold back on the amount of comfort they can give, for one reason of another. I don’t want to leave because here in his arms I can feel my depressing pain melting away slowly- mental and physical. If I could only stay here like this forever.

Apparently there is no limit to how much sanity Isak brings me. It’s almost scary.

“I haven’t been hugged like this in years.” I find myself admitting.

Isak’s arms squeeze a fraction tighter. “Your life is so sad. I thought your neediness was part bad habit. I know better now and I’m sorry that I misunderstood you. Don’t be ashamed of needing affection.” He leans back to look at me, but his arms don’t slide away completely. He is smiling so softly at me and t’s so full of understanding, so much so I can feel warmth of it in my soul.

His sweetness and kindness is drawing me to him. I want to pull away before I lose myself but I can’t fight it and i can no longer think straight. My heart is fluttering as I reach up and put my hands on either side of his face. Our faces are only an inch of two apart but Isak isn’t pulling back either so I lean in even closer until our foreheads are touching. I hear Isak’s breathe hitch and my eyes fall to his lips as he licks them and swallows thickly. His very smell is flooding my senses and I feel so insanely privileged to have Isak.

“Thank you.” I whisper, my breath shaking.

“For what?” his voice is just as low and husky.

“For always being there when I need you and for not judging me.” I lean in the rest of the way and kiss Isak’s lips. Isak still doesn’t push me away; in fact he is kissing me back, and that’s all the invitation I need to go a little deeper. I press my tongue against the seam of his lips and he parts them letting me taste him mouth.

The kiss is slow, soft and comforting. Maybe it’s not passionate or fiery and there are no fireworks but that’s okay because I don’t need hot or passionate right now. What I need is the warmth filling me up and soothing every lonely part of me. I caress his cheeks as our breaths mingle. Isak’s arms are still rapped firmly around my middle, pulling me closer until there is no space left between us, until I can feel the heavy beating of his heart against my chest.

I pull back and watch Isak’s eyes slowly open. It’s a pretty sight. We simply stare at each other then and it takes a little while for reality to set back in and when it does, both Isak and I jump apart wide eyed and in awe of what just happened.

“Um wow…I um…yes…I’ll just…” Isak flounders, looking anywhere but at me.

“I agree.”

Isak finally meets my gaze and it’s with confusion. “I- I didn’t say anything yet.”

“You didn’t?” I blink at him in confusion. Gosh my head is a mess. “right…then I agree with whatever you’re about to say.”

It’s Isak’s turn to blink at me like he is wondering what the hell I’m on about. “Do you feel better now?”

“Yes. Much. Thank you.”

“Good.”

Silence

“That was…. Of course I went too far and that was unprofessional.” For the moment that’s all I feel the need to say.

“Are you apologising?”

“What? No.”

“Oh. So you’re not sorry?” Isak asks slowly

“Why would I be?”

“Don’t you regret it?”

A light laugh escapes me. “I said it’s unprofessional, but I don’t regret anything.”

If I’m not reading too much into things or merely seeing what I wish to see, Isak appears relieved that I’m not sorry for kissing him; which is fitting I suppose, since he kissed me back.

When Isak came to my office a few moments ago, I had a different problem which is now thoroughly soothed, but now I have a whole new problem which is that I have to get some work done with a brain that’s in state of disarray.

For goodness’ sake it’s just a kiss. I’m a grown man who has kissed plenty of people before. _Get it together, Even_

“I’ll take my leave.” Isak announces, interrupting my monologue. He reaches for his work bag and then he looks back at me with a small smile. I find myself drawn to his lips once again, and thinking of what they taste like. My lips are still throbbing and tingling, making it harder for me to forget what a good kisser he is.

_This is going to be a long ass evening._

“Goodnight, Isak.”

“Goodnight, Even. For the record… I don’t regret anything either.”

********

To say that I’m a frazzled mess the next day is an understatement. First of all I barely got a wink of sleep the entire night because apart from the usual problems, I have a whole new one now which is that I can’t stop thinking about kissing my boss last night.

The moment was awfully and tender what with Even sharing his problrms, and there was a little alcohol in the mix, so of course a mistake like that could happen. It’s normal. That’s why I shouldn’t be so bothered but I just am.

Okay if we’re being honest, there were times in the past when I found myself staring at Even’s pouty lips and started to wonder what it would be like kissing someone with lips like that. Now I know what it’s like alright, and it’s glorious. My boss is an outstanding kisser and I don’t know what the fuck to do with this information.

Even has called me to his office four times this morning and I don’t think I’m acting all that normal. I think I caught sight of a fleeting frown on Even’s face when I got all flustered because he mentioned his tongue while complaining about how the tea I served him burned his mouth. Looking back now, I think my reaction was very much over the fucking top. How embarrassing.

While Even is doing fine because we talked everything out yesterday, here I am acting like a teenager who got his first kiss. This can’t go on.

Talking to Magnus about my personal matters is something I’ve never particularly enjoyed, but I’m desperate so at lunch I drag him to the office building rooftop to talk.

“Even kissed me last night.” I choose to just blurt it out before I lose my nerve.

Magnus’ jaw drops with a loud gasp, his eyes as wide as saucers. “You lie!”

“I wish.”

“Oh my God!” Magnus flails his hands about for a while like he either can’t figure out what to say or he can’t choose what to say from a list of options. He catches himself eventually and asks, “What happened?”

“We were talking in his office last night and then he just kissed me.”

“Just like that?”

“Well we were also drinking.” I pause. “But come to think of it, that’s not relevant. No one was drunk.”

“Did you kiss him back?”

“Yes.”

“Is Even a good kisser?”

“Seriously, Mags?”

“What? I need to know.”

“That’s not important right now.”

“I can’t say anymore if I don’t know what kind of kisser Even is.”

I shake my head in disbelief because apparently my friend can get more extra than usual. “Even is a good kisser. Are you happy now?”

Magnus gets all elated. “I knew it.”

“Whatever, what do I do now?”

“There is nothing you can do but acknowledge that he’s the one.”

“Excuse me?”

“When I first kissed Vilde, I knew she was the one.” Magnus explains and then out of nowhere his eyes widen animatedly and he grins, leaning closer and whispering conspiratorially. “Did you feel like Even was the one when he kissed you?”

Sometimes I wonder why I bother talking to Magnus about anything. He’s so damn overzealous. “no. it’s nothing like that.” I wave him off and he rears back, disappointed.

“Then what did you feel?”

This time I take a pause to properly recall what happened in that moment. The truth is that the moment Even’s lips touched mine; all rational thought disappeared to give way to my raving senses. I can’t remember what I was thinking. I can only remember feeling great- which is a lot considering that in the past no one I kissed was able to keep my mind from judging their kissing skill.

“I don’t know. It wasn’t mind-blowing if that’s what you’re asking. I didn’t feel like I was floating, flying or any of that bullshit. It was just comfortable…and good.”

Magnus’ smile slowly widens into a huge grin and he wiggles his eyebrows suggestively at me. Like his facial expression isn’t creepy enough, he goes to say something that knocks me off kilter completely.

“I’ve always felt like Even is a good kisser and that he’s probably great in bed to. I hear that most of his exes are still hung up on him because of that.”

My jaw drops and it stays that way for a considerably long time while I figure out how to respond to _that._ With practiced ease and patience, I explain to him. “First of all, that’s so wrong. Secondly let’s not mention our boss and the things he does in bed. That’s none of both our business. What I need to know is how I should proceed from here. So far I can barely make eye contact with Even. This morning has been hell.”

“Just chill. The worst thing you can do is act on a feeling you’re not sure of. For now all you’re working with is your appreciation for Even’s great kissing skills. Let’s wait till you’re surer of what you’re feeling.”

Wow! I never thought I’d ever think it or later on say it but Magnus actually makes sense. He appears to notice my surprise and he grins, adding. “I say smart shit too sometimes.”

“It’s good to know. I’ll take your advice.”

“By the way, have you told Jonas about this?”

“No, why?”

“Mahdi?”

“Not yet.”

Magnus’s smile suddenly looks more victorious than anything else. “I’m happy to be your go-to friend for once.”

“What does that mean?”

“You normally tell Jonas this kind of stuff.”

“I talk to you and Mahdi too.”

“Of course, but only after you’ve talked to Jonas.”

Perhaps Magnus isn’t being salty or resentful here- which is fitting since he has no single resentful bone in his body- but I know a complaint when I hear one. Magnus is saying that he’s been feeling left out. This is certainly new for me. I thought I treat all my friends equally. But come to think of it, I do feel a closer bond with Jonas. I don’t want my other friends to feel bad about that though.

“You’re as much of a friend to me as Mahdi and Jonas are. In the future, _I’ll consider your feelings more.”_

*******

 _In the future, I will definitely not consider Magnus’ stupid feelings at all._ By lunch hour I’m already deeply regretting telling Magnus about that kiss. Now all our friends are blowing up my phone asking questions. Apparently Magnus told Vilde, who told Sana, who told Eva, who told Noora, who told Eskild and then it’s a blur from there.

I can’t freaking believe it. To make things worse, Extra-as-hell Eskild just created a group chat to discuss my apparent budding romance with Even. I fucking can’t with my friends. After today I will have a new respect for how good Magnus and Vilde are at gossip.

The chat is called _totally knew it_ because apparently it was so obvious to everyone else but me that something like this would go down between Even and I. Noora even went as far as saying that it’s literally impossible for me to have such a hot boss and not do anything about it.

I’m at my desk, drinking orange juice for lunch and looking at the group chat.

**_Totally knew it_ **

_Isak: I can’t believe you gossiped this hard, Mags. You’re a fucking nuisance. See if I ever tell you anything in confidence again._

_Magnus: that’s that bro love, man._

_Sana: aww Isabel is mad. Calm down, princess. We’re not trying to embarrass you. We’re just happy for you_

_Vilde: exactly. I told you to find a man and you listened_

_Isak: I haven’t found a man. It was only a kiss_

_Mahdi: Mags tells me that your boss totally has the hots for you_

_Isak: how the fuck did you deduce that, Mags?_

_Vilde: He saw Even checking your ass out once._

_Noora: OMG. Now I’m picturing that._

_Eva: me too. lol_

_Eskild: admittedly Isak does have a nice ass. Baby gay, I’m so happy you found someone who appreciates it as much as I do._

_Sana: LOL_

_Isak: where is Jonas when I need him? At least he’s sane._

_Eva: don’t worry, I told him everything. Maybe he’s just busy right now._

_Eskild: did Even say anything after he kissed you?_

_Isak: he just told me he didn’t regret doing it_

_Noora: aww. He totally wants to bang you_

_Sana: true_

_Mahdi: so, when are you asking Even out?_

_Isak: I’m not_

_Magnus: ah, you like to be be asked out instead. That’s sweet. I hope Even asks soon_

_Isak: what the fuck, Mags, I thought you told me to chill?_

_Magnus: oh. Right. I did. Well that’s all good, but should the opportunity to get laid come up, please seize it. For the record, I really did witness Even checking out your ass_

_Eskild: guys, we need to gather sometime to celebrate the fact that Isak is finally about to get laid._

_Noora: I agree but maybe we should wait until Isak does really get laid. I’m dying to hear the details. I saw a picture of Even and he looks like he’s great in bed._

_Magnus: RIGHT?! I said it too._

_Eva: well he does have delicious looking lips, and that nice hair. I think I developed a tiny kink for suits when I saw Even in one. Lucky Isak_

_Isak: I hate you all. Now I’ll be thinking of that every time I see MY BOSS._

_Sana: you’re welcome :D_

_Mahdi: chill, Issy. We’re just messing with you. Just do what comes naturally. You don’t have to force anything_

_Isak: thanks, Mahdi <3_

_Eskild: very true. You’ve had enough struggles where romance is concerned. Take your time finding someone who cares about you for once._

_Magnus: I hope it’s Even_

_Sana: I’ll support anyone who treats my Isabel like the princess he is_

_Isak: you guys are awesome when you’re not being irritating_

_Eva: aww. I miss you Isak_

_Isak: miss you too, Eva <3_

_Eva: <3_

_Mahdi: that’s it, I’m coming to Oslo tomorrow for the weekend_

_Mangus: are you serious?_

_Isak: you better not be kidding, bro_

_Mahdi: I probably have to leave by Sunday but I can manage a day in Oslo_

_Isak: I can’t wait_

_Vilde: Babe, you idiots are not hanging out at our place, right?_

_Magnus: of course not, honey._

_Noora: Mags, I think Vilde just called you an idiot_

_Magnus: it’s all love ;D_

_Sana: You’re a freak, Mags. I have to go back to work. Love you guys <3_

_Eskild: me to. Later, guys. Isak, keep it in your pants on until you’re sure Even is the one_

_Noora: lol, Eskild. let’s all chat again soon_

_Eva: definitely. Travel safe to Oslo, Mahdi. Wish I could join_

_Isak: talk to you guys soon_

_Vilde: love you all <3_

_Magnus: bye, guys. Isak keep us posted on Evak._

_Isak: what the hell is an evak?_

_Magnus: Even+Isak= evak_

_Isak: again, you’re a nuisance_

_Eva: I approve this name ;D_

_Sana: Me too_

_Eskild: already adopted it_

_Mahdi: works for me_

I sign off with a tired sigh. How can my own friends also be the bane of my existence? At least I have a smile on my face now. I hate having my personal life in the centre of everyone’s attention but it’s also fun chatting with all my friends at once.

Even is out of the office for the afternoon, so less work for me and I’m looking forward to Mahdi’s arrival, so I guess I have a reason to keep smiling for the rest of the day.

Did Even really check out my ass? I can feel my cheeks growing hotter at the idea.

Oh god!

My phone rings and momentarily distracts me. It’s a text from my mum.

_Mama: let’s have dinner tonight. It’s been a while_

It’s not the ideal date for Friday night, I don’t mind.

_Me: sure, but no surprise blind dates_

_Mama: it’s just us. I promise._

**********

Even returns to the office around 5:05 pm just as I am getting ready to leave. He looks beat. I’m guessing he had a rough time inspecting the production factory.

“Are you leaving now?” he stops by my desk to ask.

“Yes. I have dinner plans with my mother.”

“That’s nice. You have fun.” He gives me a tired but warm smile.

The conversation Even and I had yesterday about his mother comes to mind right now and I suddenly feel so bad for him. Seeing Bruce and Stella bonding over dinner yesterday easily threw Even into bad mood. I can only hope I’m not doing that to him now.

“Do you have some time? You can join us.” It’s a completely random, off-the-top-of-my-head idea, and it could be a bad one but well…here we are. I can’t take it back now.

Even looks surprised. “Won’t I intrude?”

“Not at all. Actually my mother has wanted to meet my boss at least once anyway. Not in a bad way of course.”

“Then how can I say no to that?” Even grins. “I have time.”


	5. Five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm back again with not only chapter 5 but 6 as well. Recently i had some personal issues and the zeal to write just left me, so i struggled a lot with especially chapter 5. i hope it still came out okay. i think i was also too ambitious making my chapters so long. my next chaptered story will have very short chapters. LOL.  
> while struggling to complete chapter 5, i did chapter 6 with more ease and that's why it's also complete. i debated whether to hold chapter 6 back until next week, but i decided to just post them both cause you guys deserve a double update after how much support you've given oh this story.  
> so here is chapter 5 and 6. I hope you'll enjoy.  
> much love to everyone<3

Isak and I stop by at my place first before meeting his mother, because I need to freshen up and change.

The moment we enter the lounge area in my apartment, Tulip saunters from somewhere and rushes towards me to rub her cheeks against them. I lean down to pick her up and shower her face with kisses. She purrs and curls around my neck.

Isak raises his eyebrows at us. “Should I give you two a minute alone?” he teases.

I laugh heartily at that. “I’ll quickly freshen up and change then we can go.”

“Lucky you.” He breathes a tired sigh and sits down on my couch. “I’d like to freshen up too if my place wasn’t so far away.”

“Then freshen up here.” I offer.

“Can I?”

“Sure.”

He stands back up, looking relieved. “Thanks.”

“Do you need a change of clothes?”

“I don’t want to impose.”

“You’re not imposing. I’ll show you to a bathroom you can use then you can raid my closet. I’m sure there is something you can fit into.”

“Again, I’m not short. You’re just taller than me.” Isak responds huffily

I just shrug and walk away, smiling.

********

About 30 minutes later, I step out of my bedroom all changed into one of my most comfortable pairs of blue jeans, a t-shirt and a the thick navy blue sweater Stella gifted me last Christmas. It’s about time I start making use of it. I find Isak sitting in the lounge area waiting for me. He gets up when I walk in and I take in his new outfit. He picked out a pair of jeans as well, a darker shade of blue than mine, and charcoal grey hoodie. I like the look. Complete with his wavy blonde hair, he looks all sorts of alluring in a way that makes me want to cuddle him. 

I rarely get to see Isak dressed casually but I have seen it before and I don’t remember having liked it this much. Maybe it feels a little different this time because there is a small part of me gratified by the idea of Isak wearing my clothes.

“You look nice.” I comment as I approach him and much to my surprise and enjoyment, he gives me a shy smile especially as he gives my outfit a once over with a glint of appreciation in his eyes. 

“You too.”

“Thanks. Ready to go?”

“Yes.”

********

I must say that I’m thoroughly shocked Isak invited me to dinner with his mother. This after he’s been acting jittery around me all day. I would think he needs some a little space to work out the awkwardness hovering heavily on us. Having talked about the kiss right after it happened, everything seemed easily sorted but now I realise nothing was sorted at all. I can barely get it out of my mind myself.

There is a weird stirring in my stomach all day today, particularly every time I lay eyes on Isak. The problem isn’t that I’ve never noticed how attractive Isak is- it’s that now that’s all I see when I look at him. It’s all too strange to think about after knowing Isak for so long and realising that for years now I’ve been ignoring how attractive he is.

I hope both Isak and I can do this dinner without any more awkwardness than there already is.

Isak and I meet up with his mother at the restaurant of her choice. She appears surprised that her son brought company, but thankfully there is no indication of unhappiness with the turn out.

Isak waits until we’ve all sat down at a table-me across mother and son- to introduce us. At first she is surprised to hear that I’m Isak’s boss and then her whole face lights up as she gives me such a once over. “It’s nice to meet you Mr. Bech Naesheim.”

“Please call me Even. It’s lovely to meet you too Mrs. Valtersen.” 

“Marianne.” She gently corrects

“Marianne.” I repeat, eyeing Isak and his mother in search for a resemblance. Apart from their matching blonde hair, I can’t see any other similarity. Marianne is a sweet-looking lady with a petite frame and round face with freckles on it. I her son inherited those. They look so adorable on her. So far she is entirely giving off good vibes.

She smiles sweetly at me and invites me to pick whatever I want from the menu.

“I’ve heard that the pecking duck is great here. I’d like to try that.”

“What an excellent choice.” Marianne looks very impressed.

“I’ll have the chicken breast.” Isak says and closes the menu, putting it back down on the table.

I watch his mother’s smile morph into a disapproving line. Picking up her son’s menu, she hands it back to him. “Pick something else.”

“Mum I want chicken breast.”

“Look at you- you are so thin already. Chicken breast is good for people trying to lose weight. You could use a few more pounds. For the last time, just because you have curly hair doesn’t mean you’ll look like a big baby if you gain some weight.”

“Mum please.” Isak takes a nervous glance at me and I’m really trying not to laugh. “Let’s not bring this up now. I just don’t want to gain weight.”

“You need it. Now pick something else. Hopefully a proper dish that will fill your stomach.”

“I’ve also heard great things about the tuna salad at this restaurant.” I helpfully supply and earn a sour look from Isak. “It’s fat-free but filling.” I add

“I want chicken breast.” Isak glowers like a petulant child. Again I have to hold my laughter in.

The waiter comes forward and Marianne takes it upon herself to order red meat for herself and her pouting son. Isak looks so wronged the entire time this is happening but he doesn’t argue. I’m picking up on more of Marianne’s character traits- kind but firm and a tad intimidating.

She allows me to order us my choice of white wine to go with the steak dinner.

After the waiter is gone, Marianne grins, glancing at me then at Isak. “I’m so glad you brought a date tonight, sweetheart. I was so worried that you’re having a hard time making friends these days.”

“Mum.” Isak protests scandalised. “ _This is my boss_.” He whispers emphatically between clenched teeth.

“Well he is very handsome. If only you’d use your good looks…”

“Mum please.” Isak cuts her tirade right off. His cheeks are so red that his face looks ready to burn. I must say I have never seen Isak blush this much. Not even when I kissed him. This is fascinating.

I’m hiding a smirk behind my palm, but he sees it anyway and throws me a dirty look.

“I’m just saying.” Marianne continues with an unapologetic shrug, this time regarding me with a small smile. It’s exactly Isak’s smile. There is an additional similarity they have “I hope you are not working my son to death. He needs the time to date.” her tone is firm and slightly accusatory, but polite.

Isak sighs looking helplessly at his mother.

I smile because it’s the next best thing from bursting into laughter- which is what I really want to do. “Isak is a great help to me. He is simply the best assistant I’ve ever had, so I keep him at my side all the time, but I also do my best to make sure he gets some free time.”

“oh that’s very nice of you.” turning her attention back to her son, Marianne resumes quietly nagging and scolding him in about his bad eating habits and how he needs to rest more.

Watching Isak and his mother interact is interesting and a bit funny too. Tonight there is no trace of the Isak I know. At the office he is smart, intuitive, and business savvy Executive Assistant who can be sarcastic, and incredibly grumpy and he always insists on wearing that sour little expression I’m so fond of.

Here with his mother, he is a regular son mercilessly subdued by an overbearing and overzealous mother. I’m used to his forwardness and assertiveness, yet here he is silent and tucked in his chair, head bowed like a child next to his mother; while his mother goes on about this and that.

Eventually she stops her nagging to fire me with questions at me about how her son is doing at work.

“Is he behaving himself?”

“Well-” I begin but Isak interrupts me

“Of course, mum. What sort of question is that?” whines Isak

“shush.” she quickly cuts him off. “Don’t be disrespectful. Let your boss speak.” with a dramatic pout, Isak slumps back in his seat. My goodness, I think I feel my heart melt at the sight. I’ve never seen him look this adorable. His gorgeous looks are something I noticed in passing before then really became very aware of very recently after a certain kissing incident. But this, this level of cuteness is new. 

It’s only when his mother laughs a little too loudly that I snap out of my thoughts, and I momentarily wonder how long I’ve just spend ogling at Isak.

Dinner goes over very smoothly, mostly because I thoroughly enjoy the embarrassing stories Isak’s mother plies me with about him. Apparently he was a very cute, but very mischievous and arrogant kid. The best part is watching Isak cringe and groan in embarrassment as his mother and I share laughs over each story.

When that’s passed, Marianne asks me some serious questions about myself because she apparently wants to know what kind of person I am as a man and as Isak’s boss. She zeros in on my future business prospects, potential to travel abroad, family situation, my cooking skills, my ability to do household chores and a lot more. She even asks about my alcohol intake level. I inadvertently find myself nervous as hell and carefully choosing my words to impress her.

As I almost choke through some answers, I catch a glimpse of Isak grinning wolfishly. After how Marianne embarrassed him earlier, he must be having a field day watching me squirm too. Marianne is quite intimidating.

At dessert, Marianne excuses herself, saying she needs to use the restroom.

“Great job selling yourself there.” Isak says the moment his mother is gone. “I have never seen you fidget like that.” His pupils are dilated with mirth, fork in hand toying with the chocolate cake on his plate.

I snort. “Your mother is a scary woman.”

“I get it. She has that thing about her. Early last year, she forced me to join a knitting class because she thinks that’s a great skill for a man to have. I don’t disagree but I really hated the class.”

“Scary as she might be, I think I like your mum the more I learn about her.” I say, laughing. “Knitting class? That’s priceless. It is a great skill, but I can’t picture you doing it.”

“Thank goodness. Don’t.” He stops to take a bite of the chocolate cake Marianne forced him to get for dessert. His nose wrinkles in disfavour as he chews slowly. 

“I also enjoyed listening to your embarrassing childhood stories.”

“When you sent me to your house last month to deliver Tulip’s food, I not-so-accidentally stumbled upon your photo album and took a look at your childhood photos.” he counters with a lopsided grin.

I gasp, wide-eyed with horror then narrow my eyes doubtfully at him. “You are lying.”

He puts another piece of cake in his mouth and suffers the same as before with chewing it. “I thought that one of you butt naked, playing with your toys in an empty bath tub while holding a spider man action figure, was very cute.”

Oh God he really saw them. My face starts to burn up in embarrassment and I try to laugh it off but I don’t think my try-hard cool reaction is fooling Isak at all. He seems to see my agony and grins impossibly wide. “I said you were a cute baby. Don’t be too embarrassed.”

I grimace, forced to take the little comfort he offers me. “Thank you.”

Isak nods and mournfully looks down at his cake. “My mother insists I finish this. If I don’t she’ll scold and pinch me. How the hell am I supposed to eat all this? You know how I hate chocolate cake. I can feel the calories piling up with each bite.”

“Not really. It’s a tiny piece.”

“I hate the taste of chocolate.”

I take pity on him. Leaning over, I use my fork to cut a big piece from his plate and put it on mine. “Luckily I love cake. Let me help.”

Isak looks at me, unblinking, and with an expression so full of gratefulness. Is he that burdened by a chocolate cake?

“Bless you. I won’t forget this favour.”

I laugh, shaking my head at how ridiculous he sounds. I’m really glad Isak invited me to dinner with him and his mother. I haven’t had this much fun in such a long time. There is a part of me really deep down that feels gratified by spending time with an actual family. Marianne might be a little daunting but I could tell she is only doting on her child, and this is the best example I’ve seen on a real family in a long time. 

“Thanks.” I feel the need to say. My voice has suddenly taken a serious lilt to it.

“For what?” Isak looks surprised as his eyes scrutinise my expression.

“For letting me crash your dinner. I’ve had a lot of fun with you and your mum. Dinning alone every night gets lonely very fast.”

His expression softens the, sadness touching the corners of his mouth. He’s looking at me like he knows exactly what I’m thinking and feeling, like he’s been waiting for me to say this because he knows how much I needed to be a part of something like this. “I’m happy you joined us too. Feel free to join us any time you want. I’m sure my mother won’t mind.”

It’s the best offer I’ve heard all year, and perhaps all the previous ones. The depth of my gratitude towards him is never-ending. The majority of my life has been stormy and I just barely go through life with the help of therapist after therapist. My life only took a deeper plunge when I joined my father’s company. That’s when Isak touched my life and became a light like no other I’ve ever had. He’s probably showed me more care than everyone else I’ve ever known, especially my parents. 

There were times when I was certain he would leave because of the stress he was under as my assistant because of my bad decisions, my bouts of childishness, my bad dating habits that I got him mixed up in, the times he had to do damage control because I was too depressed to get out of bed and go to work. He stayed beside me though, understanding me without too much judgment, gently guiding me back into the light never letting me lose hope, never letting my courage wane.

Till today, right this second, I keep getting stronger and gaining more confidence because of him. “She did commend my character and my alma mater among other things, so I’m really hoping she likes me.” I finally reply

“And she called you handsome… four times.” Isak smiles. “She does like you. Trust me. She’s not to type to pretend for politeness’ sake. If she is nice to you, she likes you.”

Well my ego is thoroughly stroked.

*******

“Even dear are you married?” Marianne asks most politely. She is back at the table to join us for dessert.

Isak looks at her in horror before sending me an apologetic look.

“No.” I say and she appears very pleased with my answer

“Do you go to church?”

“Not recently, no.”

“Oh what a shame. My Isak is a nice church boy. You should join us for service someday. You and I should get more acquainted as two people who care about Isak. I’d also love to get to know you better.”

“I’d like that that a lot too.”

“In the meantime, please take good care of my Isak.”

“I’m a grown man, mum.” Isak says and his mother smiles at him

“I like the idea of you and Even taking care of each other. Isn’t that much better?”

“It is, Marianne. I like it.” I reply just for the fun of earning a glower from Isak.

*******

Mahdi arrives from Bergen around 9am on Saturday morning and after I pick him up from the airport, we stop over at a coffee house for a late breakfast. He and I do some there and ultimately decide he’ll stay at my place this time since I still live alone. He stayed at Magnus’ the last time but Magnus now lives his Vilde, so that’s awkward. My spare room has no furniture yet so Mahdi has to sleep in my room, on my bed but somehow I feel like that’s better than letting my good friend stay at a hotel during such a short visit. Luckily Mahdi doesn’t mind the arrangement I’m offering.

We head to my place after the coffee house and Magnus arrives an hour later. At this point we decide to engage in some healthy competition and play some FIFA.

While I’m grabbing some beer from the fridge, Magnus starts telling me about how he and Vilde went to see a live ice hockey match last night and how I should have tagged along.

“I dislike ice hockey. Besides, I has diner with Even and my mother.”

“What?” Mahdi splutters. “Meeting the parents already.”

“It’s not like that.” I return to the living area and put the beer down on my small coffee table.

“So Even accepted your invitation to dinner just like that? I like his technique.” Magnus’ eyes are wide with excitement and admiration. I feel like smacking him instead with the can of beer I’m handing him.

I plop down on a vacant couch and sigh loudly after handing Mahdi his beer and opening mine. “What do you mean technique?”

“ the technique he’s using to get into your pants of course.” He provides looking like it’s the most obvious thing

My jaw drops. “Our boss is not trying to get in my pants. Oh my God Magnus, why would you even say that?”

“I don’t see why else he would tag along to meet your mother.” Mahdi says and Magnus nods along

“He tagged along because I invited him and…” I stop myself belatedly realising that I can’t go into detail about how bad I felt for Even because he has mommy issues.

“And?” Magnus urges.

“well I was being polite in inviting him and he accepted.”

“Seeing as he is trying to get in your pants.” Mahdi deadpans, taking his turn to look as though he is relaying an obvious point.

I roll my eyes at my friends. “Whatever. The point is maybe I need to find someone or else my mother might, God forbid, start setting me up again.”

Mahdi laughs. “Yeah you are doomed, man. Your mum is pushy.”

“What does she think of Even?” Magnus asks, taking a sip of his beer.

“Of course she loves him. When Even left, she went on and on about how handsome and well-mannered he is.”

“Aww already approving of her future son-in-law.” Coos Magnus

Again I want to smack his stupid face. “Don’t even joke about that. My mother will only be too happy to see Even and I together. I think that’s what she was hinting at all night when she kept bringing up the fact that I’m clinically single.” I face palm and groan, suddenly remembering. “It was so embarrassing.”

“Couldn’t have been that bad, bro. seriously lighten up.” Mahdi says. “Gosh, you need to get laid soon, dude.”

“I’m trying. Lately I just haven’t had the time, especially considering the fact that Even won’t let me breath.”

Magnus snaps his fingers and sits up, almost bouncing in his seat like he just got a life-changing idea. “If you won’t seduce Even, then tell him to hook you up with someone. He is cool and nice, so he is bound to have friends with similar traits.”

Before replying, I take a long moment to give my dear friend a nice long look that undoubtedly lets him know how stupid and fucking extra I think he is. “No thanks Magnus, I don’t need our boss knowing that I’m actively trying to get laid. Thanks to my mother, he now knows too much about me already.”

“Again, aww.” Magnus coos once more, pulling another groan from me.

“let’s just play the game now.” I suggest. “After a humiliating meal with my mother and my boss, beating someone at FIFA is the only way I can get my balls back tonight.” I admit and then choose to ignore my friends’ snickers.

********

After playing video games until well into the afternoon, we head out to have lunch at a steakhouse then we visit a quiet bar to play pool and have more drinks. Though Jonas isn’t here with us, this is most fun we’ve all had in a while and I regret having to leave my friends for the evening to go see some boring ass play.

At the same time that’s not too bad when I think about it and that’s probably only because I’m going with Even.

“I can’t believe I came all the way from Bergen to visit you and you’re leaving.” Mahdi gripes for the umpteenth time from where he is sprawled out on my bed next to Magnus, who is texting Vilde and grinning like an idiot. I roll my eyes, throwing a sweater on. “Again I’m sorry, but I can’t get out of this one. Trust me I don’t want to be stuck at some King Lea play either.”

Mahdi makes a face. “Sounds boring as hell. Don’t go.”

“The guy in the play is my boss’ friend. I can’t not go.”

“The only reason why I’m okay with this is because you’re going with Even. By the way I hope you are not actually wearing that sweater.”

I pause to peer down at myself and then back at Mahdi. “What’s wrong with my sweater?”

At this point Magnus looks up and gives me a once over then he wrinkles his nose. “Dude, I know you haven’t dated in a while but that outfit is pathetic.”

“I don’t need to look exceptional. This isn’t a date.”

Both Magnus and Mahdi scoff and then laugh. “Yeah sure, bro.” Mahdi says and gets off the bed, walking to my closet. I stand there watching him skim through my clothes. “You have so much formal shit in here.” He comments.

“I’m an EA in a corporation.”

“One who lacks a social life as well”

Apparently also following what’s happening, Magnus finally abandons his phone and joins Mahdi in trying to find me an outfit for me. I go to the mirror to inspect my reflection and I see nothing wrong with my black dress pants, sky blue dress shirt and white sweater.

“Seriously guys I look fine.”

“You look like you’re going to apply for golfing membership at a country club.” Magnus mutters and before I can reply, he shouts. “Yes. Got it!” he emerges from my closet with a pair of jeans and Mahdi follows with a T-shirt.

I shake my head. “I’m not wearing that.”

“We’re trying to make you look younger.” Magnus explains

“And fuckable.” Mahdi adds. “Nothing about that outfit is flattering at all.”

“I’m not trying to flatter anyone tonight.”

“And saying shit like that is exactly why you haven’t had sex in months. I’m not letting you leave this apartment wearing that mess.”

*********

Isak and I meet outside the theatre and I’m totally taken aback by his outfit. My heart stills in my chest as I take in the blue denims, white t-shirt and olive bomber jacket. He looks stunning. I’m pretty sure I’m staring and it’s getting creepy but I can’t look away no matter what effort I put into trying to. His curly hair is styled in a way that makes my hands itch to reach out and touch it.

His lips twitch, forming a nervous little smile. “Is the outfit strange?” he gingerly stuffs his hand sin his jeans pockets.

I shake my head, not trusting myself to speak, least I blurt out how hot I think he looks.

“So it’s okay?” he asks slowly, regarding me carefully as if to properly decipher my facial expression.

I clear my throat, thankful that the cool night air is cooling my warming cheeks down. “You look very nice.” I finally find my voice.

Isak visibly relaxes and finally gives me a full smile. “thanks.” Then like an afterthought, he adds. “You too.”

I peer down briefly at my navy chinos, light blue sweater and grey blazer. It’s not my best but it’s good to hear Isak’s appreciation. “Thanks.”

“Shall we go inside?”

“Let’s.”

*********

As expected, the play is a dreadful bore. The only thing that makes the ordeal bearable is Isak’s humorous commentary and the jokes he keeps making about it. Also, he dozes off twice and I find that pretty entertaining.

“How was the play?” I ask him after its all over and we are going backstage to greet Bruce.

“It cured my insomnia.”

I laugh wholeheartedly because honestly hat’s the funniest thing I’ve heard in a while. “Ouch.”

“Let’s just say I’m never doing this again. Shakespeare stuff sucks.”

“I agree king Lea sucks, but Romeo and Juliet is nice.”

Isak gives me a look. “Of course you like all that romance. How is your romance film blog? I haven’t visited in a while.”

“I haven’t posted in a while either. I haven’t really had the time to watch any movies lately.”

“That’s a shame. You can blog about how boring King Lea is.”

“Thanks for coming with me tonight. I wouldn’t have survived that without you pointing out every flaw in the play.” I chuckle.

“You’re welcome. I’m shocked that Bruce really stopped his parents from coming here.”

“Maybe he knew it would suck.”

********

We meet up with Bruce backstage and take photos with him. Isak excuses himself to take a phone call while I talk to Bruce about his play and do my best to commend him even though I wasn’t all that impressed with his performance as the male lead. He thanks me for making time to come and invites Isak and me for drinks after leaving here.

Isak returns and announces that he has to leave.

My mood instantly comes crushing down. “Why?” I ask him

“Emma just called and she’s invited me to join her for cocktails.”

That throws me into an even fouler mood. Why the hell is Emma still chasing after Isak for goodness’ sake? Can’t she take a fucking hint? “Sorry.” Isak mutters with a shrug and a small apologetic smile.

I feel like he is being snatched from me and I’m suddenly feeling super greedy with him right now. I’m not nearly as excited about drinks with Bruce as I am by the idea of spending more time with Isak. I don’t know how he does it but he makes everything fun and that much more bearable for me. It’s selfish to want him to myself all the time but I guess that ship has sailed.

“It’s a shame you can’t join us, Isak. Maybe next time?” Bruce is saying.

“Definitely.” Isak replies and then he turns to me. “I’ll see you on Monday.”

“Yeah.” I mutter, failing to keep the disappointment from my voice.

For a second something flashes on Isak’s face, a fleetingly dullness in his eyes before he masks it with a smile.

“Where are you and Emma having drinks?” I ask Isak

“She’s yet to text me the address.” 

“Then let’s all go.” I turn to Bruce, “you don’t mind, do you?”

“I’m okay with wherever alcohol is.”

“It’s set then.” I declared and hope that gladness I notice flicker on Isak’s face isn’t just me imagining things.

********

The cocktail bar Emma invites me to as speak-easy-like, civilised bar that I’m not used to frequenting. The bar isn’t crowded, the lighting is just dim enough so that you can still see who is who, there are no disco lights and there is no deafeningly loud music thrumming. I kind of like this atmosphere. I didn’t even know Oslo has places like this. I make a note to bring my friends here someday.

Even, Brue and I split up pretty quickly as Emma spots me the moment I arrive and walks over to greet us all with a hug each. She expresses surprise at seeing Even here with me, but there is no indication of her hating the idea.

My evening with Emma hasn’t started yet and there is already deeply seated dread in my gut. She mutters something about stealing me away then she takes my hand and leads me to her booth where 3 of her other friends are seated, 2 girls and a guy. Emma rushes through the introductions and I nearly forget everyone’s name almost immediately. The one thing I do notice is how she introduces me as _her_ Isak.

The guy- Alexander I think- shoots me a knowing grin. The other two girls-Jenny(Jamie? Janie?) and Tiril…or something- just glance at me and giggle.

The table already has several drinks on it as well as meat and cheese snacks. Emma invites me to get comfortable.

For the next long while, I’m literally thrust into a conversation I care nothing about and know nothing about. I feel forgotten majority of the time as Emma and her friends talk about their jobs, the people they know and catch up on country club gossip. The rest of what they are saying goes right over my head. The only time there is room for me to get a word in is when they start talking about movies they recently saw. I’ve seen a few myself. The only upside is that I’m sitting where I have a perfect view of the bar, so I’m entertaining myself a little by people-watching.

In conclusion, Emma is a horrible host and I’m not drunk enough for this shit.

I wonder how Even’s night going. I hope he is having a better time than I am.

As if on cue, I spot Even at the bar. Of course he has his back to me but I’d recognise him anywhere. Not many people look that fine in Chinos, blazers and can look so effortlessly good with messily styled hair.

He’s just standing there alone sipping on his drink. Ever drawn to him like a moth towards light, I’m on my feet before I realise what I’m doing.

“Excuse me. I’ll be right back.” I say to everyone.

Emma looks at me with askance but thank goodness she doesn’t actually voice those questions out. She just takes my hand and gives it a light squeeze. “Don’t be gone too long.”

_Don’t hold your breath._

********

I tap Even on the shoulder from behind. “Hi.”

Even turns around and grins the moment he is hit with recognition. “Hey.”

“What are you doing here by yourself?”

“Bruce just met up with some friends here and they are catching up. I felt a little out of place.”

“You’re preaching to choir. I need a beer…or 10.”

Even laughs heartily, eyes crinkling and all. I like it when he smiles this big. He looks so happy and adorably boyish. The sight never fails to cause a stir in my chest.

He turns to the bartender and orders me a beer, which comes within 20 seconds.

I gape at Even in shock. “A bar where I don’t have to wait 20 minutes to get a beer? I’m impressed.”

Even braces his elbow on the bar surface and rests his temple down on his hand, his gaze steadily holding mine. “What kind of bars do you go to?” he looks and sounds amused even before I’ve given an answer.

“The kind where by the time you’re leaving, you can’t hear out of one ear and you’re covered in sweat and alcohol. Sometimes vomit too.”

Even’s face contorts in disgust. “I haven’t partied like that since college. Don’t know how I ever did it. I couldn’t handle that now.”

“No one should have to at this age.” I pause to take a swig of my beer. A soft sigh slips passed my lips when I put the bottle back down. “That’s better.”

“Glad to hear it.”

“Did I mention that I’m really glad you came here with me? You’re already providing me an excuse to ditch Emma.”

“Just so you know…” Even trails off and looks past me before his gaze returns to me. “She and her friends have keen eyes on us.”

I shake my head. “I’m cutting ties with her once and for all tonight. Stringing her along isn’t helping either one of us.”

“Technically you’re not stringing her along since you already told her you weren’t interested.”

“Apparently I wasn’t clear. I intend of being very clear tonight.”

Even hums and licks his lips before taking a sip of what I assume is brandy. My gaze is drawn to his lips and that quickly takes my thoughts back to what these lips felt against mine, the taste of his mouth and the feel of his tongue against mine.

I gaze so intently at his mouth, getting the urge to taste his lips again. Heat creeps up on my face from my neck all the way to my ears but I still can’t bring myself to look away. Not until Even himself interrupts me by suddenly turning towards me and speaking. “If she still doesn’t get it after tonight, you have the right to move on with your life whether she likes it or not.”

“I agree.”

I’m really hoping Even can’t see my red cheeks under this dim lighting. Or maybe he thinks I’m just getting tipsy. “So, are you going back to the party?” I point my chin in the direction of Bruce’s table.

“Hell no. After this I’m heading home. The history channel is doing coverage on civil and world wars. Tonight it’s the cold war.”

“I’ve seen your Greek mythology inspired drawings but I had no idea you’re interested in history. By the way the drawings are nice.”

“Thanks. I got into history pretty recently. I figured I need something to do apart from working some more and watching Mexican soap operas when I’m at home.”

“I’m happy for you.” I chuckle at the memory of the one time I went to Even’s apartment in the morning and found him curled up on his couch, intently watching some Mexican soap opera with blood shot eyes. Apparently he didn’t sleep at all that night because he had to catch up and find out which member of the male lead killed the female lead’s mother. Honestly I don’t know how Even enjoys that crap. “There is more to life than watching Latin hotties on TV.”

Even’s face breaks into a huge knowing smirk. “What do you watch on TV, Isak?”

“action films, Crappy American comedies, some fantasy stuff sometimes. Nothing educational. I had interest in science related programmes once but that was back when I had dreams of becoming a doctor.”

“You?” his eyebrows shoot up with mirth. “Since when?”

“Forever actually.”

“How did you end up becoming an EA?”

I peer down at where my left hand thumbnail is absently scratching the label on the beer bottle I’m holding. “Life happened.” I shrug. I’m alright with leaving things there but Even is giving me a look that says he wants to hear more, so I humour him. “My mother got depressed after dad left her. By the time I graduated high school, she got diagnosed with schizophrenia. My dad had already moved on to a new woman and he had focused on that. He helped out but not much.”

“I tried to look after mum but I had to look out for myself as well. I had dreams, so I managed to get into University of Oslo. At first that was great at first until I got so stressed between school, part time jobs and looking after mum. I had to support myself and her. With time I got madder and madder, thinking my selfish parents were trying to steal my life. I started hating my mother and I lost respect for her.

“I started looking down upon mental illness, thinking that anyone who would let their own mind fuck with them is weak-minded. I thought that mentally ill people selfishly force the people around them to forgo all else and concentrate only on them.” I notice Even quite visibly wince when I say that last bit and something fleetingly flashes across his face but it’s gone before I can read what it is.

“Later I realised that I only felt that way because I was guilty about going away to university and leaving my sick mother alone.” I shrug again. “In the end I had to make a choice and it had to be my mother. Of course.”

“So you dropped out of Uni.” Even finishes for me and I nod.

“2 years later after she got a lot better, I considered going back to med school but I had financial responsibilities to take care of at home. There was no way I could take on such a long programme, so I picked something shorter and with more breathing space to do part time jobs.”

Even is staring at me with an expression I can’t quite read. It’s a little between surprise and awe. “When I had that manic episode and you helped me out, I just thought you had some super awesome natural ability to look after others. I had no idea you’d been through something so difficult at a young age, that you spent so long taking care of your mother. You’re an amazing person Isak. I honestly don’t know anyone with a bigger heart than you.”

I’m truly touched that Even thinks so highly of me. I peer at him under my lashes and offer a shy smile. “This life isn’t what I dreamt of but I’m happy.”

For the remainder of our conversation- which is much lighter now and has less to do with anyone’s personal life- I can’t shake the feeling that Even’s mood has shifted. Something is wrong again and I’m wondering what it is. Is it something I said?

Emma pops up seemingly out of nowhere and she stands in adjacent to Even and I, scowling at the both of us. “What the fuck, Even? Why do you always steal Isak from me?” she indignantly fires at him and then takes my hand. “It’s 11 o’clock for goodness’ sake. Stop making him work so hard.”

“Actually this isn’t a work call.” I correct and she shoots me an unappreciative glare as well.

I look at Even expecting him to be amused but he isn’t. There isn’t a single trace of humour at all on his face. With chilling seriousness, he puts his glass down and smiles slightly at Emma. “You’re right. I’m sorry. Isak is all yours now. I have to go now anyway.” 

What! Why? Even is the only person making this damned night bearable for me.

“Must you leave?” I hear myself ask before I can stop myself.

“I have to interview cat sitters for Tulip in the morning. It’s not healthy for her to be by herself so much.”

“She was mean to her previous sitters. That’s not your fault. Kudos for trying again.”

“Parents shouldn’t give up on their kids.”

“That’s the sweetest thing I’ve ever heard you say.” My face breaks into a smile and finally, finally Even smiles too.

Obviously feeling forgotten, Emma harrumphs and glares at us both, “goodnight then, Even.” She says dismissively and then tugs on my arm. “Come on, Isak. Let’s go.”

Even waves at me with a tiny smile on his face as Emma drags me away, and I look longingly at him, hating to leave him there.

*******

The next day Magnus and I escort Mahdi to the airport and we say our goodbyes there. I really hate to see him go, so I make a note to visit him really soon. Magnus voices out the same thing I’m thinking.

While Magnus heads to the market to meet Vilde once we’ve left the airport, I proceed to church. After service my mother announces that she’s set me up on a date for this afternoon.

“Since you won’t date that nice boss of yours, I created another opportunity for you.” She smiles so brightly and optimistically.

“Oh how nice.” I mutter dryly, seeing no way to get out of this one. Apart from my own desperate need to date, my mother’s reputation is at stake. She explains the guy I’m set to go out with today happens to be the son of one of my mother’s friends from the church treasury committee.

Mum gives me the guy’s name-Paul- and his phone number before we part ways.

I get home and spend my late morning to early afternoon lying in bed and eating pizza for lunch. I finally drag myself out of bed at about 13pm to get ready for my dreaded date.

Just as I’m very reluctantly dragging my tired body out of bed, my phone rings. It’s Even calling. God, what does he want now?

“Hey I need your help.” Even says the moment I answer.

“Are you at the office?”

“Yeah, but I’m not asking you to come here. We can talk on the phone.”

“Can’t. I have a family emergency. By emergency I mean my mother set me up…on a date…again.”

“Damn! Sorry.”

“Thanks.”

“The good news is you have a handsome face and sick sense of style. Whoever the guy is, he is bound to like you.”

I smile at his flattery, “again, thanks. Are you in dire need of my help with something?”

“Actually never mind. Forget I called at all. I’ll manage. Go and have fun… hopefully.”

My eyes roll on their own volition, “I guarantee that I won’t. Sure you don’t need me?”

“Like you’ve said, I don’t pay you overtime anyway.”

My laugh is a little weak because I’m shocked that Even isn’t persuading me to help him. That’s new, and while it’s a breath of fresh air that I don’t have to go to the office, there is also weirdness to the whole thing.

Even is really acting weird.

“Okay cool.” I choose to shrug it off…. for now.

“By the way, did you manage to clear things up with Emma?” Even asks

“Not really. She still insists she’ll only believe me when she sees me actually dating a man. She has this idea that I’m pretending to be gay to get rid of her.”

“Well this morning she called me to say she could feel some chemistry between the two of your last night and that you might be bisexual.” Even laughs. “I must say she is very persistent.”

“Maybe I’ll take selfies with my date today and post them somewhere. That could drive the point across.”

“Don’t count on it.”

*********

Paul is already waiting for me at the café when I get there for our afternoon coffee date. It’s not hard to spot him because my mother was helpful enough to send me a picture of the guy a few moments ago. I’m sure she supplied him one of me too considering that he recognises me too when I walk into the place.

“I don’t know what you like, so I waited for you to arrive.” Paul explains as we sit down across each other after shaking hands.

The very introduction is extremely awkward to say the least. It seems we are both very bad at blind dates. We fumble in effort to avoid bringing up the fact that our parents set us up because, well, that’s just embarrassing to mention. Seeing that is about to be hell, I order the strongest coffee on the menu, wishing cafes served alcoholic beverages.

After we are done talking about our careers, it seems there is nothing left to say. Sharing our hobbies isn’t helping much because we have nothing at all in common, making it impossible for our conversation to flow smoothly.

Paul loves to read while I hate it. I’m still trying to get through that book Sana recommended for me. 

While I’m a soccer fan, Paul loves baseball and wrestling- both of which I know close to nothing about. Apparently Paul knows a little about soccer, but not enough to hold an entire exciting conversation about it.

By the time we are on Paul’s forth hobby, I’ve lost interest in the conversation and really any hope that this date will get interesting any time soon. I think he eventually notices too, because he doesn’t even bother to suggest we go somewhere else after having coffee.

Somehow we both survive the many episodes of awkward silence all the way to the end of the one and a half hour long date.

“We should do this again sometime. Maybe go do something else?” Paul asks me, making it obvious that he is really hoping I say yes.

So I do say yes because despite what some people might think, I have empathy. Besides, Paul isn’t _that_ bad. At least he is very nice to look at what with his dark hair, smooth tan skin, mysterious brown eyes and broad frame. Some secondary good qualities include his politeness and nice smile.

“I’ll call you.”

“Great.” Paul doesn’t even bother to downplay how pleased he is by my answer.

We exchange phone numbers and go our separate ways.

My date didn’t last as long as I expected it to, so now I’m left with the rest of Sunday afternoon and evening to get through without any plans. All my friends have girlfriends whom they are probably spending time with right now, so it’s useless to call any of them.

I’m so not up for going home to sit around in boredom. Sighing, I look at the time on my wrist watch and it reads 4pm. Even must still be at the office working. Perhaps I could go and put in a few hours there to pass the time there. Working is not usually my first choice of activity on a Sunday, but earlier Even sounded like a man in desperate need of his assistant.

For the life of me I can’t understand why I’m about to willingly sacrifice my free time for a job I find stressful. Yes I want to help Even, but it makes no sense at all that I’m going this far to Even. That idiot doesn’t deserve this much of my loyalty at all yet here I am running to him. I’m starting to think that maybe what I feel is just way more than mere loyalty and dedication.

**********

Around 4pm, Isak walks into the office, surprising me entirely. “Isak, what are you doing here?”

He shrugs, heading straight to his desk. “My date is over and I don’t want to go home.”

While the aspect of this situation where Isak’s date sucked sits very well with me, I’m not okay with him coming to the office.

“So you came to the office?” my eyebrows shoot up suspiciously at that. It’s not the first time I’m seeing Isak looking soft and comfortable in jeans and a hoodie, but I find myself struggling to tear my gaze away from him. 

“Trust me I’m shocked to be here too.”

He strides across the office to my desk and his cologne floods my senses. He smells good too. It’s different from what he usually wears. I can’t help wondering whether it’s cologne he recently got for today’s today or it’s something he reserves for dates. 

“What are you doing here?” Isak is asking.

“Looking into more potential investors for our overdue tax situation.”

“What did you need my help for?”

“I just needed an update on how far along things are with the companies we’ve contacted.”

Isak’s lips thin, his eyes darkening. I know this look very well. It means I’m about to get a scolding.

“I see you didn’t go over the report I left on your desk on Friday.”

I smile sheepishly, hoping it’s cute enough to thwart some of Isak’s anger. “I didn’t get a chance to. The good news is you are here now though, so you can tell me what’s in the report.”

He rolls his eyes and pushes out a frustrated breath, but thankfully doesn’t say anything else. Instead he starts looking for the report on my under all the documents scattered on my desk. Once it’s retrieved, he hands it to me and then takes a seat across my desk.

As I flip through the report, Isak is also explaining things in summery. “I called the people over at ActEvity, and Own said this isn’t a good time for them. They are in the middle of a hostile takeover, so their first priority is looking for a white knight.”

“Did you call Sasha back?”

“She says we are still in their queue for potential clients.”

“Leroy and Moore?”

“They said our portfolio isn’t strong enough to yield them tangible profits if they invest.”

I look up from the report in my hands, “Okay, does anyone sound like they actually want to help us?” 

“No.”

I wince, the pain of that answer almost physical. Wordlessly I close the report and place it somewhere on top of the mess on my desk.

“We’ll keep trying.” Isak says and I look at him. The irritation from a moment ago is long gone and his expression has softened. It doesn’t look like he pities me. There is only understanding written in his eyes. “We’ll keep trying.” He repeats more vehemently. “We’ll succeed eventually.”

All I can do is nod because my throat is suddenly dry. Isak is in front of me doing his part as a great assistant yet all I want to do is flee this scene and all the torment that comes with it. I think he knows too, because often times I can sense him keeping a close eye on me to make sure I don’t bail on this company. 

Isak stands up from his seat, “give me that list of potential clients. I’ll continue where you left off while you take a break.”

“It’s fine. I’ve got this. You can go home and rest.”

Isak shrugs. “I don’t mind.”

“It’s Sunday afternoon, Isak. Go out there and live. try to sleep maybe.”

“I have no life to live.” he says with a chuckle and I feel

“Maybe that’s a good reason why you should try to get a life.”

Isak frowns, little wrinkles forming between his eyebrows. “What’s it to you? I said I’m okay with being here.”

“Well I’m not.” I snap.

“What the hell is wrong with you, Even?”

“What’s wrong with you? Why can’t you just…. I stop myself to take a deep breath because I’m getting too worked up here.

“Why can’t I just what?”

_Why can’t you stop caring so much? Why can’t you stop sacrificing so much for people? Why can’t you live for yourself for once?_

I want to say all that but I can’t bring myself to. The truth is that last night at the cocktail bar when Isak told me about his mother, I realised how much Isak has lost in his life while he had to take care of someone. I couldn’t help comparing that situation to this one. Undoubtedly Isak has made countless sacrifices for me too, giving himself up every time to put me, my job, my health, my comfort and my life first. I realise I have been selfishly relishing in his kindness while I give close to nothing back. I’ve ever been on the benefiting side of this deal since he started working for me.

I have literally made my life his life, and there is close to no room for him to live his own life.

He’s 28 now and not getting any younger. It would be nice if he could be free to do something for himself for once. I don’t want to be the reason he is holding back from living his life. I’ve taken enough from him already. Who knows why he has insomnia? It could be the stress of looking after me.

“Even?” he urges with surprising gentleness to his tone of voice.

“Nothing. It’s nothing.” I retort waspishly.

Isak is silent for a moment during which I’m looking away to avoid his gaze. I’m afraid I’ll be able to read what his thinking when I see his face. I don’t want to know what he’s thinking.

“I don’t know what the hell has come over you, but if you don’t want to talk about it that’s fine by me. I won’t force it out of you.”

“Why don’t you ever listen to me?”  
I listen to you all the time. You’re my boss.”

I give him a deadpan look. “You know what I mean.”

Isak smirks, looking he does know exactly what I mean. “I don’t do anything I don’t want to. You know that. Now stop nagging and email me that list.” He demands without room for argument, and walks away to his desk.

_How can I take care of you too if you won’t listen to me?_


	6. Six

By the time I get my head out of my work and look out the window, it’s getting dark outside. My gaze slides to Isak and he is idly staring at me with his cheek resting on his palm, looking bored out of his mind. I laugh at the sight.

“How is it going over there?”

He shrugs, “literally nothing is going on.”

“You should have left earlier.”

“And leave you here alone to do our job? That’s rude. I’m your assistant, remember?”

“So nice of you.”

“Please tell me you are done.”

“Nope.”

“What time is it?”

He peers down at my wrist watch, “6:52.”

“That’s it. We are leaving.” I slowly rise to my feet and the ache in my shoulders just heightens my eagerness to get the hell out of here.

“Going home sounds great right now.” Isak replies with a surprising amount of eagerness that potential surpasses my own.

“Actually I feel like spending money on a ridiculously expensive meal. Join me.”

Firstly I always feel like spoiling myself after I work hard. Secondly I want to thank Isak for coming over to help me out thirdly I want to show Isak what a real date looks like since he obviously had a shitty one today. His mother did ask me to take good care of him, so it’s my duty to treat him to a nice meal once in a while. Finally, this is my way of way forcing Isak out of the office and going out to have a bit of fun.

Isak on the other hand instantly narrows at me in a way I’m very familiar with, as if scrutinizing me for any signs of suspicious behaviour.

“I’m fine, Isak.” I roll my eyes impatiently, feeling irritated by suspicion when I’m only trying to be nice.

“Let me be the judge of that. Should I call your therapist?”

I give him a deadpan look. “Do I have to be tested for mental illness every time I choose to have some fun?”

My question appears to disarm him and his inspecting facial expression shifts to something more apologetic. “No you don’t. I’m sorry.”

“Then please have dinner with me at a stupidly expensive restaurant.”

“I’m not dressed for the occasion though.”

“Neither am I.”

“At least you have dress pants on. By the way I will never understand how you make tucking a t-shirt into dress pants work.”

“I’ll show you how it’s done some time. Now let’s go already.” I walk over to his desk, reach for my arm and literally pull him up and out of his seat. 

********

Even’s choice of restaurant is expensive alright. Everything from the colour palette to the furniture and the kind of people here just screams money.

A waiter brings us some menus and disappears, promising to return soon. While perusing through the menu, my eyebrows rise higher and higher at the prices. I glance at him about to complain

“Don’t start. I can afford it. Order anything you want.”

“I don’t want to burden you.”

“It’s not a burden.”

“It is for me, because unlike the other people you bring here, I actually know your bank balance.”

Even looks like he is about to argue but then thinks better of it and meekly lowers his gaze back to the menu, “good point. I forgot how off-putting it can be hanging out with someone who knows you too well.” He mutters quietly but waspishly

Rolling my eyes, I’m forced to concede because of course I want Even to be frugal, but not at the expense of his happiness. “We can get the most expensive wine here or something. Is that better?”

Even grins so brightly, all traces of his sulking completely gone. He is so easy to placate, he think, shaking my head. I also note how his eye smile causes a stir in my chest. This happens every time just like clockwork. it is a beautiful smile. 

The rest of our dinner goes very smoothly with close to no conversation. I’m not exactly in a chatting mood and Even seems pensive, so neither of us pushes the other to talk. The atmosphere is still confortable.

It’s over dessert that Even finally asks about my date. We’ve both ordered chocolate cake and munching away.

“It was successful.” I say with a shrug.

Even smiles, lifting his eyebrows. “what a word to attach to something romantic.”

“It was not romantic.” I’m quick to dismiss. “he is a cop. We had close to nothing to talk about. At some point things got so awkward that I considered asking him to help me zero in on some human rights I might be ignorant about.”

Not holding anything back, Even laughs at me. Hard. It doesn’t irritate me because I’m just happy to see him laughing again.

“I’m sure something about the date was nice.” He says.

I actually have to take a moment to try and remember if there was. “he is hot. At least he was nice to look at. He was super polite too.”

“Are you going to see him again?”

“Yeah I agreed to do another date. Apparently he felt the awkwardness too, but he still wants to try again .”

Even stares at me for a little too long and it’s obvious he is thinking. I just don’t know about what. Just as the staring is getting a little uncomfortable, he snaps out of whatever and speaks. “That’s good. No one likes a quitter.” He offers a tight smile with that.

“I guess.”

We fall into silence again and then Even abruptly adds, “it’s also good to know that nothing good ever comes out of forcing things. Sometimes something that feels wrong is just wrong.” A certain unreadable expression fleetingly crosses his face and it has me wondering what he is thinking about as he is telling me this.

Sometimes I feel like I know him so well and other times- like now when his eyes are wide and full of mystery- it’s like I don’t know him as well as I think I do.

I don’t have a single thing to say to that, so I simply give him a nod and a hum. 

*******

On Monday round midday Isak gets a call from Jonas. Thankfully Isak is alone in the break room having some tea, so he can answer.

“Well you’ve been quiet. where have you been?” Isak asks right away

“I can explain, man.” Jonas sounds amused.

“Then explain.”

“I smelled a promotion and I’m trying to get it. I’ve been working non-stop, kissing my supervisor’s ass.”

“That’s great, bro.” Isak smiles brightly, genuinely pleased to hear this news. Jonas has worked so hard since he joined the hotel he’s working for in Rogaland as assistant operations manager. “Tell me more.”

“The operations manager at our hotel in Oslo has been promoted to overall chief operations officer, so the post of branch operations manager is open and my supervisor recommended me because he doesn’t want to move from Rogaland.”

“You mean you could move back to Oslo? This news just keeps better and better. I hope it works out.”

“Me too. HR is sending me to Oslo today to on a 3-day trip to visit the operations department over there. I’m heading to Oslo right now, man. Surprise.”

*******

“You’re in a good mood.” Even notes while we are riding the private elevator to the ground floor, and on the way to a 3pm meeting with another potential investor from Scotland. Things didn’t work out with the Italian investors because their demands threatened to throw Golden Gates into a number of issues with the local labour laws office.

“Jonas is coming to town tonight.”

“On a Monday? That’s highly irregular.”

“He has some business here.”

“For how long?”

“3 days.”

“I hope the two of you can go out and have fun. Let me know if you need some time off or something.”

I look at Even, surprised and narrow my eyes suspiciously at him when his gaze meets mine. “If I didn’t know any better I’d think you’re trying to force me out of the office lately, Even.”

He shrugs. “You never ask for time off. I’m just saying that the option is open.”

I consider that for a moment. “We barely have a moment to waste though. the company is in hot soup.”

“ _I’m_ in hot soup.” Even gently reminds

“We are in this together, remember? I thought you liked that.”

“Yes but I’d like you to take care of your wellbeing as well. Are you sleeping any better these days?”

“Yes actually. I sleep up to 4 hours now.”

“That’s still 4 less than you’re supposed to get. Are you seeing a new doctor?”

I consider the option of lying because I know Even will scold. Then again I’m a grown man with the right to make my own health choices. “I don’t need one at the moment.”

Even’s expression hardens but surprisingly he doesn’t lecture me about it. “Get a new doctor anyway. In a week’s time I’ll get one for you if you don’t do it yourself.”

“Yes, daddy.” I roll my eyes

A slow smirk stretches across Even’s face. “That sounds all kinds of wrong.”

“I know.”

We both break into laughter.

*********

Jonas calls me while Even and I are driving to Jonas’ hotel. Even is dropping me off there because luckily it’s on the route to his place.

“It’s 7:21. Are you still coming?” Jonas asks

“Sorry I’m running a little late. Even and I had a meeting to attend and it lasted longer than anticipated.”

“Are you still at the meeting? I mean if you can’t make it we can have dinner tomorrow night.”

“No need to cancel. We just left the meeting.”

“Is Even still with you?”

“Yeah, why?”

“Invite him to dinner with us.”

“Um… hold on” I turn towards Even. “Jonas is inviting you to dinner with us.”

Even looks surprised at first but he gets over it pretty quickly and shrugs, “sure, if I won’t be intruding.”

“You won’t be intruding.”

“Then I’ll come with.”

I resume my conversation with Jonas. “Yeah. Sorry. Even says he’ll join us. I’ll let you know when we get there.”

“Great. See you soon.”

**********

Jonas meets us in the lobby of the impressive hotel. I’ve never been to a place with an architectural style that seamlessly blends heritage and modern themes. Even doesn’t seem to care at all about our gorgeous surroundings. He’s probably been to places like this a lot. I mean I have too thanks to my job, but a still know how to appreciate a good thing when I see it.

I take a moment to give my firnd a big hug before introducing him to Even.

“I’ve heard a lot about you.” Jonas tells Even

“I hope Isak says nice things about me.”

“Nice enough.” Jonas grins and then sends me a subtle wink.

 _Don’t cause trouble for me,_ I tell him with my scowl, and he looks away unbothered.

As per Jonas’ request, the waiter briefly walks us through food and wine recommendations before leaving us to decide.

“I think the waiter sold the Mediterranean quinoa salad pretty well. I’ll have that.” I say

“Go for the quinoa tabbouleh. It’s better.” Jonas advices

“It looks pricier too.”

“Feel free. Everything is on me.”

Even looks up from the menu. “Allow me to chip in.”

“That’s okay. I invited you to dinner, so I’ll pay.” Jonas insists

“I must warn you that I’m a big eater.”

“Jonas gives Even a once over. “Doesn’t look like it.”

“Don’t let my lean frame fool you. Yes I have the body of a god but I love to eat.”

Jonas laughs. “You and me both. again, feel free to order anything you want.”

“then I’d like to try the balsamic baked chicken breast.” Even mutters while browsing through the menu.

“That has way too much cheese in it. You could use a lot less dairy in your diet.”

“Cheese is delicious. Don’t be a killjoy.”

“Alright go ahead and eat that but you should expect zero fat yogurt in the morning.”

Even makes an indignant face at me and I thoroughly ignore him, enjoying my victory.

Conversation is slow and awkward at first bur trust Even to skilfully and smoothly put Jonas at ease right away by inviting him to talk a bit about his work and interests. Before long we are all comfortably talking about life, the weather, work, favourite TV shows, movies and any other related topics that come to mind; while digging into our food.

“The food and service here is great.” Even says to Jonas at some point during the meal. “I’m impressed.”

“Thank you.” Jonas.” We try to thrive for excellence.”

Even is about to say something but his phone rings and he apologetically excuses himself before leaving, saying he must take the call.

“Even is so cool.” Jonas comments the moment Even is out of sight.

“Yeah he is.”

“I don’t get why you complain so much about him at times. He is all good vibes, politeness and manners.”

“He’s not perfect. He has his annoying moments.”

Jonas smiles and doesn’t argue. We both sip on our white wine in companionable silence and after a short while, he unceremoniously adds, “Even likes you.”

I smile proudly. “Of course he likes me. I’m part cute, part smart, part sassy and part sweet.”

Jonas grins. “You forgot grumpy. In any case, I mean he _likes_ you a lot.” Before I can answer, he goes on. “And I think you like him too. Am I wrong?”

I sputter, barking out a surprised laugh. “what!”

Jonas just raises his bushy eyebrows at me. My lips open and close in speechlessness, my eyebrows furrowed at the certainty in Jonas’ voice “How can you be so sure?”

“He kissed you, dude.” Jonas deadpans. “And you kissed him back. Magnus was explicit with the details.” Jonas grins then. “It’s like he was there in the room with you and Even.”

My eyes roll so hard at that. “That wasn’t like a hot or romantic thing. It was…” I trail off in thought, looking for the right words to explain it.

“Oh he definitely likes you. I’m surprised that you’re the closest to him and yet you can’t tell. It’s right there. For goodness’s sake he went to dinner with your mum.”

“We are just familiar that’s all.”

Jonas hums, regarding me with a slight twist on his lips. I don’t think he believes me. “It probably seems that way to you because the two of you are all friendly but I sense something more there. You guys are so…domestic. It’s like you skipped all the hot exciting stuff and went right into married life.” He laughs at that last bit, shaking his head. “You are already finishing each other’s sentences and telling Even what to eat. It’s cute.”

“Stop it.” heat starts creeping up my cheeks. “Even is my boss. If you’re wrong about his feelings for me and I make a move, imagine how awkward things could get.”

Jonas smirks. “So you do like him.”

I shrug nonchalantly, pretending my sleepless nights haven’t been filled with thoughts of kissing Even again. “Well he’s hot, he’s a good kisser and he’s nice to talk to.” Plus there is that way my stomach lurches when he says something sweet to me, but that’s irrelevant to mention. I used to hate mushy stuff until I met Even. He is all mushy and nice and sweet and romantic and all that crap that makes me want to throw up. I never actually feel like throwing up though so okay maybe I like him a little bit.

It’s Even for goodness’ sake. He’s so easy to like.

And love.

“That’s the most I’ve heard you say about a guy in a while. Stop overthinking it or trying to deny it. Just enjoy the feeling and see where it takes you. Having any kind of feelings for a person is healthy you know.”

I’m still testing Jonas’ advise when Even returns.

“What did I miss?” He asks with a smile the moment he sits down

“Isak thinks he is part cute, part sweet, part smart, part cute and part sassy.”

“What?” Even laughs and looks at me. “Really? Do you?”

My jaw drops incredulously and I feel the heat filling my cheeks. “Jonas!”

But the bastard who is quite possibly now my former best friend just goes on like I haven’t even spoken. “Yes he thinks so. He said so himself.”

Even is still laughing when he gently nudges my arm. “I agree. You are all those things.”

My cheeks grow hotter and I duck my head to hide it while mumbling something about how I need a new best friend.

Dinner continues over more chatter and banter. Sometimes Jonas and I get lost in catching up that we forget Even; other times Even and Jonas go off talking about whatever they discover they have in common and I’m forgotten; other times Even and I forget we’re not alone and we lose ourselves in talking about stuff only we know.

In the end everything works out and everyone is still smiling by the end of the meal. I can’t help feeling all gooey inside at how good Even is with people. Just like the evening we had dinner with my mother, I’m left in awe of him.

He and Jonas are getting along so well that they are now making plans to hang out again someday when Jonas visits here or if Even goes to Rogaland. 

“That’s a great idea.” Jonas lights up at the idea of going to watch a live ice hockey match with Even. He turns towards me. “You can come too if you want, Issy.”

“You mean I wasn’t already invited when this conversation started?” I throw Jonas a playfully dirty look.

“Of course you were.” Even says. “We are just not sure you’d like ice hockey.”

They are already a ‘ _we’_?

“I’ll try not to fall asleep.”

“Then we’ll all go. Unfortunately I’m very busy this week but I’d really like to make this plan happen.”

“It’s fine if you’re busy. We can go see a game another time we are all free.” Jonas says.

“So, where are you staying, bro?” I ask Jonas

“At this hotel.”

“nice!” I nod in approval, looking around at our lush surroundings. I can imagine what the rooms look like. “Can you have a friend over?”

“Of course. You can come by any time. We’ll have a traditional guys’-night-in and invite Mags too if Vilde will let him.”

“Awesome.”

Jonas turns to Even. “It’s been a real pleasure meeting you.”

“I feel the same way.” Even replies with a kind smile. “Thanks again for inviting me to dinner.”

“You’re welcome.”

“I’ll definitely eat here again and recommend the place to some business associates.”

“That’s very nice of you. Thank you.”

“No problem.”

*********

My second date with Paul isn’t any better than the first one. To start with, I hate wrestling, but he insisted it would be fun. I’m not having fun at all. To think I got a haircut for this bullshit.

To make matters worse, I can’t stop thinking about Even and comparing this date to the times I’ve been out with him. That makes zero sense considering I’ve never been out on a single date with Even. Maybe it’s that kiss messing with my brain again.

I might not be sure what my exact feelings for Even are, but now that Jonas has put the idea in my mind that I might like Even, I find myself thinking about Even at odd times. Like now while I’m a date with another guy, I keep thinking about the menu at this bar and the baseball game playing on the TV. I know it’s not fair to be so harsh on Paul since he hasn’t known me long at all, yet I still catch myself thinking that Even would never make me watch baseball or come anywhere near greasy food.

As Paul drones on about the misadventures of his job, I tune him out completely and ponder about what possible reason there could be for my liking Even. Apart from him being an excellent kisser of course. Gosh I can’t say that enough in my head. I think my cheeks crimson every time I think of that kiss.

I mean sure Even is nice, he is a hard worker and he has that nice hair. He has an artsy and dorky side that few people know about. Watching him play with Tulip is a truly heart-warming sight. He is hard working and always smells nice. I mean always. I have witnessed him just getting out of bed with terrible bedhead and he still smelled nice. He has lips too pouty not to notice right away.

There was that one time he shared his expensive dark chocolate with me.

And then there is his ass. It’s true that thanks to the devastating results of a manic episode during which Even walked the streets naked, the public saw badly take pictures of Even’s nudity before they were all eventually taken down. While everyone else saw a bunch of poorly shot images by random citizens under the dimly lit streets of Oslo, I got to see Even’s naked body up close later and I must say he has a very nice ass.

When I went to pick him up at the police station after the incident, the officers has assisted him with a trench coat thankfully and when he got to his apartment, his mind was so far gone that he just haphazardly stripped right in front of me before stepping into his bathroom.

I looked away of course, but not quick enough to miss the entire show, at the time my I was too shaken up with confusion and worry that I was in no state to appreciate what I saw. When I look back now, it was a glorious sight.

So there is a lot I like about Even, but I can’t ignore the fact that he is my boss and that alone nearly outweighs all the good. Yet somehow Even is better than Paul seeing as I’m fantasising about Even’s ass while talking to Paul.

“I’m talking too much about my job, aren’t I?” Paul is saying with a bashful smile when I tune back in.

I offer him a polite smile. “I don’t mind. I understand how work consumes us as we get older. To be honest I’m thinking a little about work too right now.” _a lot about my boss’ ass._

“Maybe we should leave and go someplace more relaxing?” he points at my untouched burger. “I noticed you also don’t like the food here.”

I look down at my plate and then back up at Paul. “”I don’t like greasy food.”

Paul’s lips an ‘o’ and he appears to process what I just said, but he doesn’t say anything.

“I must seem haughty to you right now.” I helpfully supply and that seems to be the opening he needs to air his honest opinion.

“Yeah. A bit.”

“The truth is that I am haughty.”

“I don’t mean to sound rancorous or rude but does that stem from working for an uppity person?”

The corners of my lips curl in small smile. “My boss likes greasy food just fine, so no.”

He nods. “We can still leave and go somewhere else.”

Maybe that would be better, but I think it’s better to be honest than to drag this out for longer than necessary. “I’m sorry Paul, but this isn’t working out for me.”

Paul doesn’t look surprised. “Still?”

“Still.”

“I guess I should be honest too. You and I just don’t connect in any way. I mean, we can barely hold a conversation without boring each other.”

“I agree. Let’s not string each other along and waste each other’s time when we could be investing that elsewhere.”

“Wow, you’re so straight forward.” Paul laughs a little resentfully. “It sounds like you’re ending some business relationship.”

“That’s thanks to the cut-throat world of business I work in. sorry if you are uncomfortable.”

“I’ll get over it. It helps knowing that it’s neither you nor me that’s messed up here. We just don’t work together.”

“I honestly hope you meet someone better suited for you soon.”

“And I hope you find someone who doesn’t think it’s weird to go on a date on a Tuesday night.” Paul smirks playfully. 

*********

Inside Jonas’ luxurious hotel room, Magnus, Jonas and I are all seated in a circle on the carpeted floor by the bed, drinking champagne and eating overpriced sandwiches.

“Guys, I think Vilde’s dad doesn’t like me.” Magnus says almost out of nowhere in the middle of a discussion about live hockey match we saw earlier tonight before coming back to the hotel.

“What?” Jonas frowns, licking some sour cream off his thumb.

“The first time we met, I noticed him rolling his eyes at me but I thought I imagined it. But then last week he invited me to go wine tasting with him and he tramped all my choices. This after he insulted my golfing skills a few weeks ago.”

I slap Magnus on the back, “But you’re not good at golfing bro, and your taste in wine does suck.”

Jonas laughs and then nods.

Magnus sighs and slumps his shoulders. “I don’t know. I still get a bad feeling about it all. Apparently Vilde’s ex was a really stand-up guy. What if I don’t meet her father’s expectations?”

This time I actually feel bad for my friend and I put the teasing aside to comfort him. “That stand-up guy still broke her heart, so fuck him. You have plenty to offer, man. For example your gift for gab is a charming point.”

“I agree.” Jonas puts in. “it’s a talent to not be able to shut up when you should.”

Magnus smiles, looking at Jonas and I with stars in his eyes. “Thanks guys. I just get so stressed now since Vilde and I moved in together. It already feels like we are married and the honeymoon faze is fading to give way to the tough shit.”

“Oh. You can talk to Issy about that. He and Even seem to know how to keep marriage exciting and sweet for a long time.” Jonas says, smiling teasingly at me

Magnus laughs and I glare at them both.

“Take it easy, man. We are only kidding.” Jonas literally waves it off with the palm of his hand. “Tell us about your date with Frank.”

“Paul.”

“Right. Paul.”

“It didn’t take.”

“Of course it didn’t. You’re already spoken for.” Magus casually comments like he’s saying facts.

Jonas laughs, clearly enjoying the remark. I flip both of them off.

“Anyway, Paul and I don’t have much in common and he said I was uptight and prissy because I have an uppity boss.”

“You are both of those things.” Magnus says

“Sure he can say or think whatever the fuck he wants about me, but he has no right to call Even uppity.”

“Bro.” Jonas grins. “This guy insulted you and all you could think of was defending Even’s honour?” he and Magnus share a look, shaking their heads helplessly.

Magnus turns towards me. “Yes Even _is_ kinda uppity but it’s nice that you don’t notice. That means you accept him for who he is. As they say, _‘no one understands him but his man’_.”

Both Magnus and Jonas break into laughter and I pick some pieces of food from my plate to throw at them.

“How is your love life?” I ask Jonas after the laughter dies down.

“Non-existent. Janet dumped me.” Jonas shrugs while grabbing another sandwich. “She said I was bad at communication. Whatever the fuck that means.” He looks up at Magnus and I then, “I’m good at communication, right?”

While Magnus mutters something inaudible, I look away and clear my throat before taking a sip of my champagne.

“What the fuck, guys. Are you saying she’s right?” Jonas asks, scandalised even before we’ve said anything.

“Well you are just now telling us that Janet dumped you. Imagine it happened a while ago?” Magnus asks

“Only a few weeks ago.”

I shake my head with a deadpan expression on my face.

“Whatever. I’m so over her and her selfishness. She demands oral sex but doesn’t like giving it.”

“That’s messed up.” Magnus shakes his head. “I can never understand people like that.”

“More importantly, when did we become the kind of people who sit around eating expensive food and talking about love?” I point out.

Jonas sighs unhappily. “I know hat you mean, bro. we used to be so hard and so cool back in high school. What happened to us?”

“I don’t care what kind of people we’ve become. All I care about is that I still have my home boys with me.” Magnus reasons, surprising both Jonas and I

“That’s beautiful, man.” Jonas smiles, affectionately slapping Magnus on the shoulder. “I guess that’s what matters.”

“I wish you could stay longer.” I complain. “I hope you move to Oslo.”

“Me too. In the meantime let’s get drunk on this ridiculously expensive champagne.” Jonas grabs the bottle and fills all our glasses.

**********

I literally get startled when Isak comes to the office on Thursday with a new haircut, “What happened to your hair?” I demand.

Isak frowns, just blinking at me at first as if he’s taking a moment to try and understand what the hell is happening. “I got a new haircut for my date.” He says slowly as if stating the obvious.

“Was Paul worth all this effort?”

“How did you know I went on another date with Paul?” Isak frowns, looking very suspiciously and throwing me into a deer-in-the-headlights moment.

I continue looking owlishly at him as my mind scrambles to look for the least embarrassing response. It turns out there are no lies immediately available, isn’t, so I’m left with no choice but to tell the truth. “I listened to gossip, okay. I’m sorry.”

“Who gossiped about my love life?”

“Magnus.”

Isak rolls his eyes so hard and sighs irritably, but it looks like his anger has melted away because Magnus is the company’s resident gossip and we all know it.

“Anyway, Yes I go a haircut for that date, but that’s all behind me now.” 

“Didn’t things work out?”

“No. moving on.”

Thank goodness. Something has been weighing heavy on my chest and causing me distress since I found out about Isak’s date with Paul. Of course I want Isak to be happy but not with Paul. Based on the few details Isak told me about his date with the guy, I don’t think he’s the right fit for Isak, and its relief hearing that Isak has come to the same conclusion.

“What a shame that you changed your hairstyle for him.”

“Excuse me?”

I just shake my head and wave it off, trying to downplay the fact that I hate his new look.

First I felt weird about Isak going out on a date with someone, and now I feel so angry about his stupid new hair. I have no idea what the hell is going on with me, but I need to calm the fuck down right now. “Nothing. Get to work.”

*******

Later I’m sitting at my desk in Even’s office, trying to review the weekly sales report before handing it over to him. I’m really trying to focus but Eve is making it hard with all the staring he’s doing. It’s more than just staring at me, and more like staring through me while in deep thought. I snap my fingers to try and pull him from his thoughts and he doesn’t even get startled. He just lazily blinks at me with a deapan expression on his face, “Yes?”

“What’s wrong?”

“Your thick locks of hair gave me peace.”

I chuckle in surprise, and then shake my head when I realise he is not kidding. “You are getting weird by the day.”

“Just so there is no confusion, I hate your new hair.”

“Okay? Not that my style if for your benefit, but I’ll keep that in mind.”

“Thank you.” Even says with surprising seriousness.

“Are you okay? You seem tense.”

“I’m okay.” Perhaps it’s the dismissiveness to my tone that stops me from prying further.

*******

“I’m off. I’ll be out the rest of the day.” Even announces when he steps out of his office around noon while I’m back at my desk in the reception area.

I give Even a really long schooling look. He looks fine and nothing seems to be out of the ordinary, so I’m wondering why he is leaving early. “Are you feeling sick? Is that why you’ve been weird since morning?”

“I’m fine.” He makes a long pause, awkwardly stuffing his hands in his pants pockets. “Sonja called. We are having lunch and then I’ll probably just go home.” 

I tense up immediately and I think Even notices because whatever expression I’m wearing on my face is making him increasingly nervous by the passing second.

Taking a deep breathe, I take a moment to contain my impending outburst. “The same woman who abandoned you while you were in the middle of a manic episode because she didn’t want to get involved in a mess with the press and ruin her chances of becoming CEO at her grandfather’s company?”

“That’s in the past.”

“Not for me.” _I’m the one who found you alone, cold and confused in a police cell_ , I want to say, but I decide there is no need to bring up the painful details of the night 8 months ago.

“Deep down Sonja has a good heart.”

“No she doesn’t.” _You ran out of your shared hotel room naked and the only heart she had was to call me and then take off without bothering to look for you or call the police at least._

“She was just scared, Isak. Who wouldn’t?”

_Yeah, but the difference is I put my fear aside and stayed to help you for the next 2 months, during which she never called or visited to find out how you were doing._

Even sighs sadly and lowers his gaze. At this point I realise that he can hear my thoughts loud and clear and is trying to defend that heartless bitch he can’t seem to get over.

I give him another once over and I notice that he changed his suit. He actually changed his clothes, meaning he is putting in effort to look good for Sonja. That only heightens my anger. “Is that the suit you’re wearing?”

“Yes. I think it looks good.”

“No it doesn’t. Take it off. Now.” I demand, _Because how dare you wear my favourite suit on a date with that woman_

“I thought you said you liked it.”

“I lied.”

“why are you getting worked up about my suit?” he snaps

“Because you got worked up about my new haircut. Apparently that’s what we’re doing now.” I snap right back

Silence. Really heavy silence

“I’m sorry.”

“me too.”

“I guess I’ll see you tomorrow.”

 _Fuck you, Even._ “Have a nice lunch.”

**********

Just around 5pm, I’m packing up when Magnus pays me a visit at my office.

“Where is Even.”

“out.”

“Where?”

“I don’t care.” My voice probably sounds very clipped and very monotone, but I’m too annoyed to care.

“okaaay.” Magnus drawls out and then in a more tentative tone, he adds, “You seem mad, dude. Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.”

“Vilde and I made plans for dinner and a movie tonight. You wanna join us?”

Ugh! Hell no. third wheeling is so not something I’m in the mood for. “I’d rather go home. I’m tired.”

“Are you sure you are okay?”

I look up ready to snap at Magnus’ irritating self, but the actual concern written on his face disarms me right away. “sorry.” I say with a sigh. “I’m just… I need to rest that’s all. I haven’t been sleeping well.”

“Still?” Magnus is suddenly serious, chewing on his lower lip as he worriedly stares at Isak. “Maybe you should see a different doctor for that.”

“You sound like Even.”

“He is right.” 

“I guess.” I hum non-committedly.

Magnus clamps a hand over my shoulder and gives it a good squeeze. “Get some proper help, bro. You can’t go on like this. I’m seriously worried about you.”

The concern on Magnus’ face, in his voice is so imploring and compelling. “I will. I promise.

*********

“I hear that you declined an outing with your friends.”

“How do you know that?”

“Magnus tells me a lot of things, with surprising detail. Anyway he only mentioned that when I bumped into him and Vilde at the office. I had to get something from my office before heading home.” 

“Remind me to tell Magnus exactly how much I hate him.”

Even laughs softy at that. “I think his nosiness is sweet.”

“You just like him because he worships you.”

“It’s addicting I tell you. You’d love it too if you had someone who looks at you with stars in their eyes.”

I roll my eyes, shaking my head, but the corners of my mouth quirk up. “I hate upsetting you.”

“Whatever. It’s your life”

“Yeah, but you became a huge part of it when you helped me do press damage control, kept my company afloat in my absence and visited me every day to make sure I was alive, eating and sleeping well, to clean my apartment.

Words literally fail me because my chest suddenly feels so full and about to burst.

“So how was lunch?” I’m really hoping my voice doesn’t sound as totally interested as I feel.

“Good. We did some catching up after which I told her never to contact me again.”

“What? Why?”

“This afternoon before I left, you reminded me of who she really is. I don’t need people like that in my life.”

“I didn’t say anything.”

Even chuckles. “Your face can be very expressive.”

“Alright yes I was upset. That’s why I’m in bed watching an old movie and regretting my life choices.”

“I’m sorry. If it’s any comfort, I’m sharing a bowl of ice cream with Tulip while we watch the evening news. We plan to watch a film after this.”

I can’t help the laughter that bubbles up at how miserable Even sounds. “So you are on a date with your cat. Sounds like a sucky night. Thank you for not having fun since it’s your fault mine is horrible.” And then just to get it off my chest, I add. “I have no right to dictate how you should live your life or what you do with whom, but thank you for finally taking my advice about Sonja.”

“I should be thanking you for helping me avoid another huge mistake.”

“Mistakes are meant to be made.”

“If I make too many, you’ll lose your faith in me and I don’t want that to happen.”

“My faith in you isn’t going anywhere, Even.”

“You’ve seen all the bad sides of me but at the same time you are the one person who thinks so highly of me. I don’t get that sometimes.”

“I’ve seen your good sides too. Besides, you have a lot to offer as a person.”

“That’s nice of you to say.”

“Could you repay mu kindness but staying on the phone and talking to me? I’m hoping that talking to you will help me fall asleep.”

“I feel used.”

“Because I’m asking you to put your deep, sexy voice to good use?”

“Now you’re just buttering me up.”

I grin. “Yes, keep talking.2”


	7. Seven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 7 is here and i can confidently announce that it's the second last chapter. only one more to go. this chapter got a little long because i had a lot to include. i hope it won't overwhelm you guys.  
> i don't know why but i had a hard time uploading this chapter in Rich Text. anyway, enjoy!

The next day, one of my oldest friends Mikael shows up at my office entirely unannounced. To say I’m shocked is such an understatement.

“I don’t mean to sound rude, but what are you doing here?”

Mikael shrugs. “I’m in town, so I thought I’d drop by. I knew I’d find you here.”

“You could have called beforehand at least.”

“And hear you make excuses about how you’re too busy to meet me?”

Well Mikael isn’t wrong about that. It’s embarrassing and I feel awkward hearing him say it out loud but it’s true. Whenever I can, I actively avoid meeting my old high school friends. Our falling out was so hard and because it was it was my fault, we’ve never quite successfully squashed the elephant in the room. It’s always so uncomfortable for me being around them.

“Please sit.” I invite, leading Mikael to the sitting area by the mini bar. We take our seats across each other.

“We haven’t heard from you in a while.”

“I spoke to Elias recently.”

“He told me you called. And Adam?”

“It’s been a while.” I admit.”

“I’m worried about you, bro. Is this company still shitting on you?”

“Yes.”

Mikael laughs. “At least you are trying. That’s very decent of you considering a ton of employees are relying on you.”

“Don’t remind me.”

“You need to relax a little bit. Maybe take a vacation?”

“I would, but I’ve been on countless already this year. My assistant won’t let me take another.”

“Why not?”

“I might go broke if I keep spending money on fun times.”

Mikael considers that and nods. “That makes sense.”

Mikael briefly catches me up about his latest project at his Magazine Publisher and how he is set to appear in the next issue as the best, most progressive Chief Editor the Publisher has ever had. He also tells me a little about a girl he is seeing recently and how serious he is about her. I’m about to ask more when a soft knock at the door interrupts us.

It’s Isak returning without hot beverages.

As he sets the tray down and starts pouring the tea, I frown at him confused.

“Didn’t I ask for coffee?”

“I made tea for everyone.” Isak calmly replies.

“I had tea in the morning. I’d prefer coffee now.”

“You can never have too much tea. It’s good for maintaining your lean figure. Trust me.”

My eyes narrow sceptically at Isak as he hands both Mikael and I our tea cups. “Really?”

He nods, a small smile playing on his lips- the kind of smile that always makes it impossible for me to distinguish between then he is being serious and when he is just teasing me.

Either way I let the theory dance around my head for a few moments before finally conceding. It’s wasted effort anyway trying to argue with my assistant anyway. His stubbornness can move mountains.

“Well then in that case… I suppose a sip of two won’t kill me.”

“You’ve decided wisely.” Isak smiles victoriously, and then in a more professional tone, he continues, “I’m sorry to interrupt, but may I have a quick word with you?”

“Sure.” Putting my tea down, I look at Mikael. “I’ll be right back.”

“Take your time.” Mikael replies.

Isak and I walk to my desk, and stand there facing each other. “The Director of Finance would like to meet you this afternoon.” Isak tells me

“Is it a serious matter?” I can’t help getting alarmed.

“I assume so. It sounded urgent.”

Fuck! What now? “Okay tell him its fine. Of course I’ll create time for an urgent matter.” 

“Alright, I’ll let him know.”

“Anything else?”

“Also-“Isak begins in a more playful manner, a small and knowing smile playing on his lips, “-I set up a dentist appointment for you.”

“What!” I splutter in horrent. “When?”

“Tomorrow morning after your therapist appointment.”

I shake my head right away. “I’m far too busy for that.”

“Even, we talked about this, remember?” Isak gently reminds me with a teasing gleam in his eyes.

“I know, but….” I trail off, lost for words effective enough to get me out of this appointment. “Certainly we are busy with more important things right now. Can’t I take a rain check?”

Isak’s head tilts to one side as he regards me with a yeah-like-that’s-going-to-happen expression.

“That’s what you’ve been saying for the past two months. You are going tomorrow and that’s that.” Isak declares with such finality

“Fine.” I breathe out a long suffering sigh. “But if something bad happens to me, I’ll give you hell.” 

Isak laughs quietly. “I just want a boss with healthy teeth and gums.”

I mean to pout, but I end up smiling because Isak’s laugh is so infectious.

“You’re enjoying this aren’t you?”

He reaches out to give me a squeeze on the arm. “I’m not that mean. I know that phobias aren’t rational. I promise you nothing bad will happen at the dentist’s office. I’m sure your teeth are in great shape. It’s only a check-up.”

“What’s your schedule like tomorrow morning?” 

Isak smiles meaningfully at me. “I’ll be happy to go with you.”

“Thank you.” My smile is something between gratitude and embarrassment, probably both

“I’ll stay close by to hold your hand embarrassingly tight.” He teases as always when this dentist appointment thing comes up.

“Get out!” I point my chin at the door.

“Yes, sir.” Isak is grinning wolfishly as he exits my office.

I go back to Mikael. “Sorry about that.” I tell him as I sit down.

“Is everything okay?”

“As fine as can be. Please tell me more about the new woman in your life.”

Mikael gets right back into the swing of things and he smiles fondly. “Her name is Ida and she’s in real estate. I recently used her help to find a place in Alesund.”

“Is she hot?”

“Of course. You know me.”

“That I do. She sounds like a keeper. I hope your parents don’t run her off.”

Mikael chuckles. “Me too. I’m hoping this one will impress them.”

“That sounds serious. Are you looking to marry this girl?”

“Maybe.”

“Wow. I never thought I’d see the day…. considering…” I trail off, figuring Mikael gets the picture. He was a bit more than extremely popular with girls back in high school and in College too apparently. He and I separated after high school, but word about his adventures and misadventures reached me.

“Don’t act all high and mighty. We’ve all lived, loved and regretted.”

I smirk, remembering my own glory days. “That we have.”

“Are you looking to settle down any time soon?”

“If only I could find the time to seriously date someone.”

“Weren’t you serious about Sonja? You talked about her the last time we spoke.”

“I put an end to that.”

“Finally? It’s because of that incident huh.”

“Mostly, yes.”

Mikael puts his cup of tea down and abruptly adopts a serious expression on his face. “I keep waiting for you to bring this up but it looks like you won’t, so I’ll just say it. Let’s talk about your obvious crush on your assistant?” he says matter-of-factly

I almost knock my tea over as I’m picking it up to take a sip. “Isak? What gave you that idea?” I splutter so inelegantly

Mikael blinks at me. “It’s so obvious.” He deadpans

My lips part to argue, but then I promptly realise that my friend knows me too well and trying to deny it won’t work.

“It’s complicated.” It’s not the best answer, but that’s what I can reach for right now.

“Don’t give me that.” Mikael shakes his head, making a face as if repulsed by my answer. “At least admit that you do like him.”

“I rely on him a lot.”

“And….?”

“And he is cute, and smart, and hot sometimes when he wears.…” I stop myself there because where the fuck am I going with this?

“There you go.” Mikael smiles broadly. I haven’t seen him look this proud of me in a while. I almost blush about it. “Sounds like you like him.”

“I don’t know if what I feel can be described as romantic. Maybe he and I are just familiar.”

“Taking each other to dentist appointment and holding hands? I think it’s serious.” Mikael sing-songs and my eyes widen, surprised. “Yes I heard your conversation from a moment ago.” He answers my unvoiced question.

“I’m not sure I like him enough to actually take things there.”

“Oh yes you do. I know you, bro. The two of you acted like such a married couple a few moments ago.”

I think I can feel my cheeks burning now. “Isak and I have gotten closer and closer since he started working for me and he is a cool guy, but maybe I’m kind of hoping to get over my feelings quietly.”

“Why?”

“Because falling for my own assistant is so damn cliché. Nothing good can come out of this, right? I mean, nobody will ever take our relationship seriously. Everything about it screams _office fling_. What’s more, I’m quite bad at relationships and if things don’t work with Isak, I might jeopardise our working relationship too. I need our working relationship. He is an assistant from heaven.”

Mikael nods, and surprisingly he looks understanding of what I just said. “You’ve made some fine points but I remember you used to be a sap. What happened to you? The Even I know would go for it and show everyone that true love can come to any situation.”

“Time and experience have made me a different man. Dating my assistant is still a high risk venture.”

“Stop it. You sound so damned _corporate_. Your assistant is not a business proposition.”

“I know.” I sigh tiredly. “There is little time to work all that out now. I’m in the middle of resuscitating a dying company.”

“That seems to be taking a while. At least try to balance things and have some fun too. You deserve that much.”

I can’t deny the truth in that. I’m not getting any younger and it’s about time I start living and dating again, seriously this time. I have a leadership conference to attend in Stockholm for two days starting day after tomorrow. Sounds like a great time for Isak and I to relax a little. We’ve both earned it.

“I do deserve a damned vacation.”

“What you’ve said so far makes sense but it also sounds like you are making excuses not to ask your assistant out. What’s really going on, Even?”

Again shame on me for thinking Mikael wouldn’t read deeply into things. The guy has known me most of my life after all. “Isak’s mother has a mental illness.” I explain. “He put his entire life on hold to take care of her. He even gave up his dream of becoming a doctor.”

“That’s really sad, but what’s it got to do with you?”

“You remember that incident 8 months ago when I had an episode? For 3 months Isak put his own life aside again to help me at home and at the office.”

“Wow! He sounds like a keeper, man.” Mikael marvels in awe

I shake my head. “I don’t want Isak to have the strenuous life of looking after a sick mother and boyfriend. His mother will have episodes and so will I. That’s too much for Isak to handle.”

Mikael’s smile slowly fades as the point appears to hit him. “That’s deep.” He pauses for a few beats. “Maybe you should ask what he thinks about all this.”

“He has too huge a heart. This is a choice I have to make for him.”

Mikael thankfully doesn’t argue and he actually lets the issue end there.

“Even.” Mikael gets serious all of a sudden. “About what happened in the past… let’s move on. I liked Emilie a lot and what went down between the two of you was messed up, but you weren’t in your right mind and that’s also in the past. We were all young and none of what we felt was true love anyway.”

The guilt hit me pretty hard even though it’s true that I was manic when I slept with a girl Mikael liked. What everything worse for me was losing my best friend and inevitably messing up our entire squad for many years to come. I still awful about everything and like I deserve all the hate directed at me, the guilt I feel.

But it has also been 12 years and maybe it is time to let all that go. Maybe my friendships with Mikael and Muta may never fully heal but I’ve punished myself enough.

“I think I’ve needed to hear you say that. Thank you.”

“I guess what I’m trying to say is that I don’t want you feeling like you are along anymore. Mutta and I are here for you whenever you need us.”

********

Isak catches me before I have to leave for my meeting with the director of Finance.

“Everything including flight booking and hotel reservations is ready for our trip to Stockholm tomorrow.” He tells me.

“Thanks, Isak.”

“I also contacted your new cat sitter just to confirm that he’s free to look after Tulip tomorrow.”

“Okay, I’ll get her ready when I get home.”

Isak smiles at me. “You seem to be in a better mood. Did the visit from your old friend go well?”

“Better than well. We agreed to finally bury the hatchet.”

I’ve never shared the details of what happened between Mikael and me with Isak, and he doesn’t ask me now but he is so delighted for me regardless.

“I’m happy for you.”

********

Isak and I arrive in Stockholm on Friday early morning and we rush to the Leadership Conference which starts at 9:30 am at the Stockholm City Conference Centre. As the conference progresses I take a peek at Isak every now and again out of habit. He appears more focused than usual, which is disappointing for me because I’m bored out of my mind right now and I’d like to sneak our phones under the desk and exchange funny memes. The conference Room is huge and so is the turnout, so it’s only too easy for me to zone out whenever he wants to. I wonder why Isak is suddenly so serious.

At lunch while I’m forced to make small talk with some other businessmen, Isak disappears after barely touching his food. I’m now wondering if he’s okay.

We manage to survive through the afternoon portion of the conference which finally comes to an end at 4:30pm. later on the way to our hotel in a rental car, I ask Isak why he is so quiet all of a sudden. “You seem off. Is everything okay?”

I’m doing the driving while Isak is in the passenger seat quietly looking out the window.

He turns towards me with a blank look on his face, then my question visibly sinks in slowly and he answers, “Nothing’s wrong.”

“You are quieter than usual.”

“oh.” Isak’s gaze drops down to his clasped hands. “I have a slight headache that’s all.” He looks back at me. “May I retire to my room the rest of the day?”

I want to ask more, but all I say is, “Of course. Get some rest and feel better.”

******

_Even: I know you’re awake. I’m at the door. Open up._

I blink again and again at the text in disbelief. Even is here? What does he want at 7pm in the evening?

It’s hard not to grumble as I slowly get out of bed and make my way to the door. Seriously is it so hard for Even to give me a break? I bet he wants me to accompany him to some boring business dinner with some colleagues here in Stockholm.

I open the door and find Even standing there and looking gravely at me with a slight scowl on his face. “Are you feeling any better?” he asks without preamble.

Taken aback, I flounder a bit with my words before finding my footing. “um… not really.”

He hums and then brings a paper bag into sight. “I brought you something to help with your headache and insomnia-related stress.” 

“I was just about to call you myself to remind you about your evening dose of medication. Did you take it?”

“I did, and this is about you.” Even puts his hands on my shoulders and gently pushes me backwards into the room while he stepping inside. He pushes the door closed with his foot and proceeds to push me towards the sleeping area.

He puts the paper bag down on the small table by the bed then takes his jacket off and drapes it on the back of the chair near the table.

“You should get back into bed.” Even tells me

“I have a guest. That’s a bit rude.”

“Never mind your manners. You need rest. Get into bed. Now.” his no nonsense tone leaves me with no choice but to comply.

Once I’m seated in bed, Even grabs the paper bag from the table and settles at the edge of the bed beside me. I am momentarily subjected to his silent scrutiny after which he clicks his tongue and shakes his head. “You look horrible.” Then more quietly he mutters, “I don’t know how I didn’t notice before.”

For a few seconds I’m shocked to stiffness at seeing Even actually looking troubled by this. It’s not like he is a selfish and heartless jerk, but Even is one of those people that simply chooses not to sweat the small stuff. Sometimes he doesn’t even sweat some big stuff. To see him so worried about a mere headache is quite astounding and honestly touching as well. I don’t know why but I feel gratified.

Meanwhile Even reaches into the paper bag and takes out a plastic drinking bottle with a thick white/green liquid in it. He hands it to me and I school it with much suspicion.

“It’ll help you feel better. Drink it all.”

“Are you sure?”

“Don’t ask question. Trust me.” He asks so earnestly like there is more to the request than just the remedy in my hand. I have absolutely no reason to mistrust Even, so I twist the lid off the bottle and take the first sip, not at all expecting the gust of strong flavours that explodes in my mouth. I choke while struggling to swallow. Gosh I wish I could spit it out. The taste is so bad. “What’s in this?”

“It’s plain yogurt, berries, spinach and some spices that hell relieve headaches and insomnia. Does it taste very bad?”

“Yes.”

“Take five sips at least.”

“I can barely swallow one.”

Frowning, Even takes the bottle from my hand, brings it to his lips and takes a sip as well much to my shock. He lets it settle in his mouth for a while and then he wrinkles his nose in revulsion. “Yeah, it tastes bad, but you need it.”

“Were di you find this?”

“I have my sources. Drink up.”

I shamelessly pout at him and shake my head.

Even sighs, “okay I’ll help you. We’ll take turns sipping until we finish the bottle. Is that better?”

“You’d go that far to help me out? Why?”

Even smiles sadly, voice soft when he says. “8 months ago you dropped everything to take care of me when I had the most disastrous manic episode of my life. This is the least I can do for you.”

“I don’t do that so you can return the favour.”

“I know. I want to help you though.”

I return his warm smile. “Thanks, Even.”

“You’re welcome.”

*********

“We should take a mini vacation tomorrow.” I tell Isak. I’ve moved over on the bed to make more room for him beside me, so he’s now lying down too. We are both lying on our sides and facing each other.

“Aren’t we heading back to Oslo?”

“It’s Saturday. We don’t have to.”

“Are there nice things to do in Stockholm?”

“There’s plenty.”

“What’s your ideal vacation, Even?”

“Reservations and good customer service.”

I laugh lightly. “I mean what kind of stuff do you enjoy?”

“Reservations and being tended to.” He repeats with a laugh of his own.

“Oh God, you’re hopeless.”

“Alright, alright. I enjoy outdoorsy stuff.”

“Okay now we are getting somewhere. Tell me more.”

“Back in high school I visited a farm in Ireland as part of a school field trip. It was fun.”

I don’t know why picturing that is making me laugh.

Wearing a lopsided grin, I listen to Even animatedly tell me all about the field trip, all the greenery he saw; the pictures he and his friends took; the cattle, chickens, rabbits and pigs he got to see and feed; the horses he got the pet. Apparently he even milked a cow.

“The only drawback was the number snakes and spiders on the farm.”

I shudder in horror. “I couldn’t handle that. Would you like to visit a farm again someday?”

“Maybe, but admittedly it would be much harder for me do anything now. I have way less energy and enthusiasm now than I did back then.”

“In other words you’ve gone soft.”

Even grins but doesn’t deny it. “Big City life is best for me now.”

“Me too. I’ve never liked the countryside or anything to do with farming. Growing up, my mother tried to encourage me to get into flower gardening- a beloved hobby of hers- but I hated it.”

“Tell me more about your childhood.”

“There is nothing much. I played soccer with friends, went to church every Sunday, watched TV whenever I could….” I trail off thinking about how I often used the noise from the TV to drown out the sound of my parents screaming at each other.

“Bad memory?” Even asks

“That obvious?”

“You look solemn all of a sudden. Your eyes are more expressive than you think.”

“I just thought of all the fighting my parents did when I was growing up.”

“It must have been hard for you.”

“At some point all they did was fight and hate each other. Dad drank and mum got obsessed with church. I hated them both because their situation made me unhappy. I was about 16 when I decided to walk away from it all. The situation at home wasn’t good and I was having crisis with working out my sexuality. I couldn’t turn to my two best friends Eva and Jonas because I’d just messed up their relationship. One miserable night, I ended up at some gay bar, got shit drunk and someone picked me up.”

“Oh my God, I hope they didn’t take advantage of you.”

“No. his name is Eskild and he’s really cool. We’re still close. He took me to his place and then I just…stayed.”

“Did your parents come to get you?”

“After a while yes. My mother did after she left dad. I was relieved when they got divorced.” I laugh ruefully at Even, suddenly realising the onslaught of sad shit I just poured on him. “That got sad pretty quickly. Sorry.”

“It’s okay.” Even says seriously, but softly

“well…then thank you for listening. Was your childhood any better?”

“No. My story is similar to yours actually.”

“Can I hear it?”

“Are you really up for listening to a really sad story?”

“You owe me that much. I just shared mine.”

He nods and silently stares at me for a little while then he says, “My parents hated each other too and they fought a lot about money. They were cheating on each other and they focused a lot on making money. No one really cared about me and I got sadder and sadder as I got older. As a teenager I got really depressed sometimes and other times I put aside all my problems and did a lot of stupid stuff only a teenage boy can do, without realising what I was doing. My parents thought I was just a teenager seeking attention and acting out. That’s until I got diagnosed with bipolar disorder. I was 15 by then. They went me to therapy and that’s the most they showed any care. Luckily I had my good friends Mutta and Mikael. We got up to some really stupid but fun stuff together. Nothing changed even after my diagnosis.”

“Later I messed everything up when I slept with a girl Mikael really liked. We were still in high school. It happened while I was manic. That was the point when my bipolar condition finally became a problem. The squad broke up and we didn’t talk to each other for a really long time, especially because I transferred to another school.

“We all graduated high school and my parents sent me to study in Manhattan. At that time they also got divorced. Mutta was the first to try and reach out to me but things were far too awkward between us. Eventually I sucked it up and contacted Mikael and that was worse. We both tried to act like were passed what had happened in high school, but we really weren’t. He was still upset and I was still very guilty. We were very distant friends obligated to check on each other from time to time at best.

“I made other friends in America but nothing too meaningful because I was afraid of really getting close to someone then hurting them. My parents weren’t together anymore, they disliked me and I had no best friends to come back to here In Oslo, so I stayed in New York until I found a job.”

I’m not bored at all from listening to Even tell me about his life in greater detail. Far from it actually, but maybe it’s the concoction he made me drink or the soothing lilt of his quiet, deep voice that’s making my body feel so relaxed and so sleepy. My eyelids keep drooping. “Then what happened?” I encourage him to continue.

“Then dad died and I had to come back. Mum and Jackson begged me to stay and take over the family business. Everything felt foreign because my father had never made it seem like a family business. He never took me to Golden Gates or talked to me about it. I stayed because I thought it might bring me closer to my mother, but you know how that turned out.”

“You’ve lived a sad life.” I mutter regrettably. Life sucks for everyone but I wish I was there to keep him company at least. It sounds like he was very lonely at many points in his life. It’s heart breaking. If I wasn’t lying down and feeling terribly sleepy, I’d give you a hug.”

Even smiles, making me feel more appreciating of the fact that he can still smile, laugh and be goofy after what he’s been through. “It’s the thought that counts.” He says

“It’s so good that you and Mikael finally decided to move on from the problems you had in the past.”

“Yeah. It felt so good hearing him tell me that I’m not alone.”

“You are _not_ alone.” I repeat for emphasis

Eventually my limbs get heavier, releasing the tension of stressful days on end, and my eyes can no longer stay open even though I can still hear Even’s voice speaking to me.

“Are you falling asleep?” Even asks

“hm.” I hum, having trouble speaking.

I feel his hand on my cheek, caressing there and tucking stands of hair behind my ear. “Get some rest then.” He says

“Don’t go.” I slur, my own needy voice sounding foreign even to me.

“I’m not going anywhere.” He whispers and I feel his plush lips press softly against my forehead, then my cheeks and finally my lips. He lingers a little on my lips before finally pulling away.

The rest is a blur as sleep completely consumes me.

********

When I wake up the morning, the first thing I notice is that Even is gone. I don’t expect him to still be here since he’s a busy man so that’s fine. Besides, nothing can ruin my god mood right now. I stretch languidly, feeling so rested and so wonderful. The second thing I notice is the time. It’s just after 7am meaning I’ve been sleeping for about 8 hours. I haven’t slept this well in months. I don’t know what was in that thing Even made me drink but the one thing I’m sure of is I have him to thank for this.

He cared enough to find some remedy for me, then he came over to check on me and stayed, we had a heart to heart, he kissed me goodnight and then held me in his arms while I slept.

Now my heart can’t stop fluttering at all and I know this feeling. I like Even. I really like him. In fact I might just me half in love with him. It’s not the first time Even is making my heart melt. Falling for him was easy I guess. It’s admitting to myself that was hard. It was easy for me to pretend it wasn’t happening because having the kind of feelings for one’s own boss is almost never a good thing.

I can’t pretend anymore now. I swear I might jump on Even and kiss him the moment I set my eyes on him again. How can I not when Even makes me feel… everything. He makes me angry, sad, frustrated and hurt but at the same time he makes me laugh and smile for no reason sometimes. He shoots down my bouts of insecurity and reassures me, I feel the happiest when I’m with him, he doesn’t judge me and I’ve never felt judgement towards him, I think he’s cute when he’s being silly, I never grow tired of his company, I’m always willingly giving into things I don’t normally compromise on.

For goodness’ sake I spend time thinking of ways to take care of him than to take care of me. I don’t know if he knows how good he is to me. I do most of the caring as his assistant but he does his fair share of nice things for me too. Sometimes it feels like he gets me at a level that no one else in my life does. When he kisses me it feels like home.

Oh my God of course I’m more than half in love with Even. I’m 100% and a half in love with him. The realisation is both scary and exciting.

And now I have to spend a whole day hanging out with him. While the idea has me nervous, I’m also very thrilled about spending time with him in a relaxed setting. I’ll sort my feelings out later after enjoying Stockholm.

Throwing the covers back, I get up and out of bed. It’s time to shower and look my best. Thankfully I brought a pair of jeans. Even seems to like me in that.

********

Even opens the door to his hotel room and whatever I’m about to say gets knocked right out of me. Even is dressed in light blue jeans, a matching denim jacket and a pure white T-shirt inside. I’ve seen him in jeans and t-shirts and undoubtedly the look is gorgeous on him; but the denim jacket? That’s new. And I love it. The style makes him look a lot younger and more fun.

“Is it the jacket?” Even asks, smiling and wiggling his eyebrows at me. “I haven’t dressed like this since college. Please tell me that look on your face doesn’t mean I look stupid.”

“You don’t look stupid.” I manage to mutter without making it obvious that my mouth watering at the scent of Even’s body wash and aftershave.

I wonder if I’m more aware of this stuff now because I’ve accepted my love for him. “You look great.” I add

“Thanks.” Even looks pleased and then he gives me an appreciative once over. “In the future I might ask you to wear jeans to the office. You look good in that.”

“Thanks. I must say that after wearing suits so often, I forgot how comfortable look is.”

“Very true.” He nods and then. “Good morning.” He chirps in English, finally stepping aside to let me in.

“Good morning.” I humour him, replying in English.

I trail behind him in silence as he leads me to the small dining table where there is breakfast laid out already at the coffee table and Even invites me on one side of the table while he does the same on the other side. 

“You are glowing this morning.” He points out

“You can say that. I slept well thanks to you.” I’m probably smiling with stars in my eyes but who the fuck cares? The man of my dreams is right in front of me.

“Really? I’m happy to hear that someone slept well.” Even replies, a small, teasing smile playing on his lips.

My eyebrows knit, “someone? Didn’t you sleep well?”

“No I didn’t sleep well.” You hog the blankets until you’re wrapped up in your own little cocoon.” He explains with amusement dancing in his eyes.

“I don’t do that.” I dispute, heat rising to my cheeks.

“Yes you do. I couldn’t even take the beddings back because I couldn’t disturb you.” It looks like he is really enjoying my embarrassment.

I give Even a big, appreciative smile anyway. “You’re very considerate.” Then more seriously, I add, “honestly, thank you, Even. Your presence really helped me rest last night.”

“You’re welcome. I’m happy to help.”

From there we don’t speak again as we start eating. Even ordered my favourite breakfast quesadillas much to my delight.

“These are delicious. Thanks.” I murmur around the bite I’m chewing.

“I thought you might appreciate that. There is a rental car waiting for us already.”

“You booked already? I was going to.”

“You are not my assistant today. I invited you to join me on this mini vacation, so I’ll handle everything.”

Well I like the sound of that.

“okay.” I smile. “What’s first on our agenda?”

“We go and get a Stockholm pass.”

“What’s that?”

“I hear that it’s a sight-seeing package which grants visitors free entry to over 60 top attractions, tours and museums.”

“Wow. I love this country.”

Even laughs. “Me too.”

********

Even is driving while I scheme through the guidebook we got along with our pass.

“There is so much to so and see. What do you think we should start with?” I ask Even

“I’m most excited about the museums.”

I roll my eyes fondly at him. “Of course you are.”

“I’ve heard good things about the Vikings museum. Let’s start there.” 

“Apparently it opens at 10am. We are just on time.” I grin at Even and he answers me with a wink.

My belly does a little flip.

*********

We have museums in Norway but none like this. This museum practically brings the Vikings to life, and I can’t contain my excitement even though Isak is teasing me mercilessly about my child-like wonder. I have always had interest in the topic of Vikings and I’ve probably seen all movies and TV shows about it.

This museum delivers its own thrill though. It’s an illusion and fantasy with the added advantage of exciting tales told by the interactive guide. There are displays of such realistic Viking families.

“This place is like your dream come true.” Isak whispers to me

“It really is. I never want to leave.”

He chuckles.

I know he has zero interest in this stuff but he hasn’t said a single bad thing or wrinkled his nose at anything since we got here. I find myself looking at him in awe of how nice he is.

By far the biggest highlight for me in the 11-minute journey on the Viking ride which makes me feel like I’ve really travelled back in time with its clever use of lighting, sound and atmospheric environments. 

Sadly we do have to leave eventually because there is much else to see. I’m excited for more attractions but that doesn’t stop me from pouting about leaving the exciting world in the Viking museum.

“Come on, I’ll buy you ice cream to cheer you up.” Isak says, taking my hand and pulling me towards where we parked our car. The Viking museum has no parking spaces, so we have to walk about 15 minutes to where we left our car.

“What should we do next?” 

It’s Isak’s turn to pick the next attraction and he picks the Bergius botanic garden. Luckily that’s not far from where we are.

*********

The one thing I like so much about Isak is that I keep learning more and more about him no matter how long we’ve known each other. I find that very fascinating and refreshing. There is never a dull moment with him. Right now I’m learning that he is a plant enthusiast.

We walk around the gardens for about two hours, just admiring the various tree, flower and shrub species. While Isak explains stuff to me, I’m taking pictures with my camera. I end getting excited too because of his infectious enthusiasm.

When the walking finally takes a toll on us, we buy and retire to the lakeside to sit down on the provided garden chairs, and enjoy that view.

Isak throws his head back and ruffles my hair, his face raised towards the sky . “This is nice.”

I look at him and smile at how serene he looks. “You should cash in your vacation days soon. We’ve only been out having fun for a few hours and you already look better.”

He turns towards me and opens one eye. “I agree we should do this again soon. We’ll visit the places we won’t be able to visit today. I have my eye on the toy museum.”

I huff out a laugh. “What do you want to go there for?”

“Who doesn’t want to see the first toy ever made?”

“You are more child-like than I thought.” _And I really like this side of you._

*******

Next, we enjoy a sight-seeing tour of Stockholm on one of their Hop on-Hop off tour buses. We hop off at some popular sites and manage to see the royal palace, the vasa museum, old town and a few shopping districts. This time Isak helps me take pictures and we huddle close together to look at them then laugh about how bad he is about it. Of course we spend more time shopping. Isak warns me about not splurging but somehow he ends up buying more than me because apparently he has friends and family to buy gifts for. I tease him about it but secretly I’m a little jealous that he has people to bring gifts for back home.

He ropes me into helping him to pick out a sweater for Magnus, a bracelet for Vilde and a necklace for his mother. I get very excited about the last one because I also want to do something nice for Isak’s mother. She was very sweet to me. In the process I buy her an antique silver bracelet- something Isak complains about, accusing me of trying to top his gift. It’s all in good fun though.

I can’t remember the last time I laughed as much as I am while shopping with Isak. My belly hurts in the best way possible and my chest feels so full of serenity and happiness. Isak talks freely to me all the time but today it’s different. He seems more gleeful and generally softer. He is smiling more; teasing me I dare say he is even cuter. Like this we easily get so wrapped up in the easy atmosphere that no one feels natural for me to put my arm around Isak or for him to hold him hand or hook his arm around mine.

I’m just getting to know his little quirks and the tiny details that make him who he is.

If I’d known that I nice day out in Stockholm is all it takes to see this side of Isak, I would have done this ages ago.

Just before giving into the stress overcoming us, we pick up some souvenirs and some snacks to eat on the bus ride back to wear our car is parked.

*******

For the boat tour, we decide to stay on board for the round trip because the walking has officially become tiresome now. The stops are pretty much the same as the bus tour, but I guess the perspective and experience is a little different from aboard a boat.

Isak isn’t complaining either. We take more pictures, point at things and comment animatedly like we didn’t just see them during the bus tour. 

*********

“Dinner?” I ask Isak when we are back inside our car. We just got back from the boat tour and it’s around 4pm.

He throws his head back against the headrest of the passenger seat and peers at me, blinking lazily. “I’m still full from all the snacks we ate.”

“That’s a shame. I had something in mind.”

“What?”

“A dinner cruise. I’ve heard great stories about the majestic sunsets here and I want to watch one with you.”

The corner of Isak’s mouth lifts. “Sounds good. Let’s go.”

*********

We get to the quays along Strandvagen just in time to catch the trip departing from there. The destination is islets of the greater Stockholm Archipelago and the journey there on the cruise is spectacular. Isak and I enjoy a cooking show, a tasting menu, their delicious appetizers, main courses, cocktails and refined desserts prepared by the chef. To top it all off there is a live DJ playing very relaxing and soothing music to suit the peaceful atmosphere.

While bobbing my head the jazzy tune now playing, I look at the dance floor and then at Isak. “wanna dance?”

“I’m too full.” He pouts and I laugh at him

“I noticed you got carried away ordering from the menu. Aren’t you supposed to be too full to have dinner here?”

“It’s not my fault their food is delicious.” He sighs and looks around with a fond expression on his face. “This has been nice.” His gaze returns to me. “Thanks for bringing me here.”

“We haven’t even seen the best part yet.”

The boat finally stops and Isak and I sit in silence, watching the sunset glowing across the Baltic Sea. It’s gorgeous. I take out my camera to take pictures while Isak is sipping on some white wine. “I don’t usually appreciate stuff like this but this is beautiful.” Isak murmurs quietly as if he’s afraid to ruin the serenity of the moment. I slide my gaze away from the sunset to look at him. His eyes are fixed on the magical scenery before eyes, twinkling with amazement and excitement. I can’t look away from how breath taking and dreamy his features look under the sunset. 

“Very beautiful.” I absently mutter back, not really aware that I’m talking. 

This feels right. In this moment I realise that I want to spend the rest of my life taking Isak to places just to see the sunset. I want to see him this happy, carefree and animated all the time. I want to spoil him, and take care of him.

I want to love him.

The agony of holding myself back from taking him into my arms and kissing him under this sunset is almost physical.

“I remember a time when I had to force you to look at the stars, and now you care about sunsets? I thought the little joys of life don’t matter to you. I’m surprised to see you enjoying yourself right now.” Isak is saying

I find that hard to understand myself. Maybe sharing these little joys with Isak is helping me appreciate them more. I don’t know what the correct answer is. all I know that everything in my life becomes that much sweeter when Isak steps into it. “This is for you actually. I thought you might like it.”

“I do it. You know me well. I won’t forget this moment.”

“I won’t let you.” I point at my camera and he smiles.

“You know, I get it now. Why you’ve wanted a vacation so desperately. You must have been desperate to get away and find some happiness again. I haven’t seen you looking this happy and relaxed in a very long time.”

“I haven’t felt this happy. I like me better this way.”

“I like this version of you better too.”

********

We end a great day in style by sipping cocktails on the drinking terrace of the Tak rooftop bar while we are snuggled close on a chair and enjoying the magnificent view as the cityscape unfolds below us. We are talking about everything and anything, laughing and trading silly childhood stories of a lighter nature than what we talked about in Isak’s hotel room last night. I feel a companionship with Isak that I haven’t felt in a very long time. For a while I’ve longed to go out somewhere and have fun with a best friend. Isak is making my wish come true right now.

After clinking enough cocktails, we stop ourselves and fall into a comfortable silence, just watching the people and cars going by beneath us.

“This trip is one of the best things that have ever happened to me.” Isak says and I turn my gaze towards him. “Nothing can compare to how nice this moment is for me.”

His eyes are gazing into mine and I stare back at his emerald green eyes that glimmer with longing, a kind of longing I know very well because I’m feeling it too. His gaze drops to my lips and now I know what he's about to do.

I am not ready at all for this. My hands get sweaty and shaky. He's leaning forward and my instinct is to take a step back and run for my life. That’s exactly what I do- pull back just when his lips are about to touch mine.

At first Isak just freezes, blinking up at me and then realisation of what just happened appears to dawn on him then he frowns and sharply draws back like he’s been slapped.

He looks at me then with so much confusion and so much hurt as well. “I thought…” he stops, his lips quivering and I think he’s blinking back tears. I’ve never seen Isak like this. It’s that this moment that I realise the damage my reaction has caused. Maybe I could have handled this better, but I just don’t see any other way than this.

“I’m sorry, Isak. I don’t think we should take things there.”

“Why not?” he demands. “I know you feel the same way as I do. I can tell.”

“That’s not important. The point is we can’t be together. I don’t want us to be together like that.”

“Well that’s good for you but, what about what I want? What about my feelings?” Isak’s voice is shaking at this point.

“You deserve better.”

“What does that mean?”

“I don’t want to be another liability in your life, okay?”

Isak frowns, visibly more confused. “What does _that_ mean?”

“It means the fewer mentally ill people you have in your life the better.”

“who the hell asked you to make that decision for me?”

“Someone has to. You neglect yourself to look after people and that’s taken a huge toll on your life. Look at you now- you can barely rest or take a vacation because you’re too selfless to abandon me in my time of need. I will have episodes once in a while and things will get difficult as you already know. I don’t want you dealing with that. All you do is take care of me and my burdens and I don’t want that to be the rest of your life.”

Isak looks at me incredulously, “Yes I wish you were easier to work for, I wish I worked for a better company and I wish I had a higher salary for all the work I do for you. In case you are wondering, yes it was hard for me when you had that manic episode. Of course I was scared and stressed because I’m human, but it wasn’t a total nightmare or I would have walked away. Don’t you ever think about that? That the option to leave is always open for me but I’ve chosen to stay with you?”

“I still don’t want to see you suffer.”

“We must not go live life expecting and fearing bad things. Difficult stuff is inevitable, Even. If it’s not your bipolar, something else will plague us and we’ll get through it like everyone does. We’ll do it together. Minute by minute, remember?”

“You deserve better.”

“No I don’t. I just want you. I love you. Taking care of you is no longer an obligation for me. I do it because _I care deeply_ about you.”

Nothing prepares me for the pain that tears through my heart when I see tears roll down Isak’s face.

I look away instantly because it’s just too painful to watch. I feel his gaze piercing into me but I refuse to look up because my resolve and conviction might crumble. I know I’m being a coward in this moment but I just can’t accept Isak’s feelings for me.

Yesterday to I told my therapist about Isak and she said that because the people I trusted with my heart as a child neglected me, I’m afraid of trusting that Isak will stay beside me.

Maybe that’s also true.


	8. Eight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it so happens that my epilogue got too long and I had to split it into two parts, so here is the first part(chapter 8). This chapter explores both Even and Isak's personal feelings and emotions as well as their feelings for each other, so it has some angst but also a lots of fluff and romance. I hope you'll like it. I love reading your comments, so please talk to me about this chapter<3
> 
> i don't know when i'll complete the final chapter but i'm hoping it'll be up by Wednesday next week, Friday latest.

“I’d like to make use of some of my vacation days now.” Isak announces in my office on Monday morning. “I know it’s sudden and that’s not very professional. I apologise but I really need this time off.”

It’s sudden yet not sudden, considering the situation at hand. The haphazard development tells me exactly how upset Isak is and as increasingly worried as I’m getting, I doubt he’ll appreciate me asking how he’s doing. He looks all kinds of dejected and sullen this morning. He is poised as always but today the usual enthusiasm he carries around with him is replaced by morose, icy rigidness that suggests how much he’s hurting inside and how much he resents me. It’s no wonder he wants to get away from me for a while

I feel like I’ve lost _my_ Isak completely because the person staring at me with such coldness and emptiness in his eyes is not him. I can’t complain. I have no right to complain but this hurts so much and thinking Isak is hurting more makes it worse for me.

“For how long?” I ask him, clearing my throat

“A week.”

“Sure. Talk to Vilde and have her process that. Please ask her to bring in someone temporary for me then you can hand over and leave.”

“Alright.” He turns around and starts walking out.

“Isak, wait!”

He stops and turns around. “Yes?”

My mouth opens and closes then opens again and closes again. This happens for a few moments as I flounder for the right thing to say to him. “I hate that you are leaving just that.”

“How would you rather I handle this?”

“Talk to me. Say something. Anything.”

“Like what?”

“Tell me that you don’t hate me. Tell me we can still be friends at least.”

His eyes narrow dangerously at me, “don’t you dare friend zone me.” He mutters through clenched teeth, his tone chillingly low. “I don’t hate you. I could never hate you. But I am angry and hurt, so I’d like to stay away from you for a while.”

“Are you going out of town?”

“What do you care for, Even?”

Ouch.

“I just want to know where I can reach you if…. I need you.”

“Well since you so badly want me to get some rest and to take a break from loving you, I’ll rest. Please don’t miss me, and don’t try to reach me.”

Again, ouch.

“Isak-”

He cuts me off impatiently. “My mother loved the bracelet you got her. She said she’ll call to thank you herself.” Without waiting for an answer, he walks out. 

********

It takes me exactly a day to realise that I’m miserable without Isak yet somehow I manage to get through three entirely hellish days. To begin with, our stock prices suddenly plummeted sharply yesterday due to our failure to launch our new product as a result of an unattainable budget. A few hours after the sharp fall, the shareholders called an emergency meeting to suggest that they vote me out and replace me with a more result-driven chief executive officer.

My mother flew into Oslo yesterday afternoon to attend the meeting as required but I haven’t had a moment alone with her. I’ve been stuck in meeting after meeting with accounts and the board, trying to convince them that I’m the right guy for this position, to convince them that I deserve another chance. At this point I think its 50-50 with half the board supporting me and the other half planning to replace me.

Melissa- my temporary assistant- is doing all she can and she’s fine but she is not Isak. Melissa is a professional EA and that’s where it ends, so she can only do so much to make the situation any less uncomfortable for me. Isak is my professional EA, _my partner and my friend,_ so he always goes all out to help me.I told him not to look after me so much and I’m regretting it already.

I feel that much irritable and stressed because Isak isn’t here to encourage me, point me in the right direction, pat me on the back when I do my best, tease me to make me smile on a tough day, hold my hand when I needs it…

I miss him so much. I’m potentially about to lose my position as CEO at my father’s company in the most humiliating, insulting and painful way possible; my mother has been in town for two days yet the closest she came to spending time with me was when she stood me up for a lunch date this afternoon; but what hurts the most is that I’m going through all this bullshit without Isak.

I’m the one who pushed him away and asked him not to care so much so I should be happy now, but I’m far from it. The emptiness I feel from not having him at all is worse than the guilt I feel when I stress him out so much.

Right now I’m sitting alone in my office on a Friday night, holding my phone in my hands while my fingers hover over Isak’s number. I can’t find the courage to call because now I know I made a fucking huge mistake and I don’t know how to take it back. Worse yet I might be too late to turn things around. I’m worried sick that Isak and I might never go back to that place we were at before the Stockholm incident.

During this morning’s appointment, my therapist helped me realise that I might never find a good thing if I don’t give people a chance; that my fear of losing the one real thing I’ve ever had in my life made me panic and sabotage it; that I’m scared but deep down I’m also enthusiastic about the possibility of truly being loved and cared for by someone, by Isak. 

She’s probably right and most notable of everything she’ told me is that it’s okay to fear but letting that fear make me hesitate keeps me further away from finding true happiness or any happiness at all. I’ll never know if Isak is the one if I don’t give him a chance. So far I now know that not having Isak at all sucks the most.

“Fuck this shit.” I mutter to myself and rise to my feet, grabbing my jacket.

I’m going to get my man back whatever it takes.

*********

To say my week off sucks is an understatement. It’s only Thursday and I’m already regretting the decision to take time off. I have nothing at all to do at home, which offers no distraction from the hurt, anger and exhaustion I feel.

I’ve gone back to having sleepless nights and this time with the added anguish of loving a man that doesn’t want me. There is no part of me that doesn’t hurt when I lie in bed at night, the moment I wake up in the morning and then proceed to spend my day lying on my couch and eating terrible food while staring at but not really watching what’s on TV.

I’ve browsed the internet and my social media, watched movies on Netflix, cleaned my previously filthy apartment, done some laundry and played some games. It’s not much, yes but that’s all I can up to by myself. Once upon a time it was enough to keep me entertained when my friends weren’t available to hang out, yet now everything just feels boring and empty. I haven’t had time to myself since I started working for Even and I thought that all the work I was doing kept stole my life but it turns out there was never a life to come back to.

My life is boring and plain. I feel empty.

An emptiness I can’t recall ever feeling when I’m at the office, when I’m with Even.

It doesn’t matter what Even and I get up to but being with him is a whole lot better than this. I can’t help missing him even though I’m also mad at him.

I heard that Golden Gates stock prices dropped suddenly after I left and while I should be relieved that I’m not over there in the midst of all that chaos, I’m still worried about Even. I feel anger and hate towards myself for wondering if he’s resting and eating well, if he’s managing his work problems well.

Maybe I care too much like Even says but I can’t help myself; not even now when I’m hurting because he rejected me. 

To make matters worse for me, while I was requesting leave in Vilde’s office this Monday morning, she noticed how distraught I looked and that coupled with my sudden decision to take a break from the office, sparked her curiosity. She asked me about it but I declined that conversation. Now all our friends know about it because she and her boyfriend gossip so fucking much. Now everyone is taking turns texting and trying to call me to ask what’s going on. Magnus even offered to visit me, an offer a hastily declined. I’m so not ready to talk about what happened between me and Even yet.

I feel not only hurt, but embarrassed and ashamed too- like the fool who thought he could ride off into the sunset with someone as hot, well spoken, educated, well-travelled and rich as Even.

The thing is I never considered Even as someone way beyond my league because he has always been so down-to-earth and nice to me as he is to other people. It really felt like he and I had a deep connection that could overcome anything. I guess I was wrong.

Yes he is a handful at the office, his love life can be chaotic and it wasn’t easy looking after him when he got severely depressed after his embarrassing manic episode; but he’s also such a beautiful handful- inside and out. There are good days too. In fact sharing his life with him offers sunnier than gloomy days. It hurts so much that after everything we’ve been through he still thinks I consider him some kind of burden; that to me his mental illness is what defines him as a man and what he has to offer.

Gosh I wish I could punch that idiot in the fucking face. He’s so stupid; too stupid to see how wonderful and lovable he is just as he is, and how much I love every bit of him.

In the beginning I hated my assistant job because it was a stressful obligation in exchange for a pay check. Then Even and I got closer and my job got easier because I developed a deep sense of loyalty towards him. Now I like taking care of him because I love him and all I want to see his life flourish.

Jonas texts me while I’m lounging on my couch for the afternoon. This is the first time he has reached out to me since he last visited.

Of course I reply to his text because he is my closest friend.

**_Jonas:_ ** _In an effort to improve on the communication thing, I’m taking a shorter time to respond to friends now._

I smile at that while typing;

**_Me:_ ** _I’m impressed_

**_Jonas:_ ** _so what’s this I hear about you suddenly cashing in your vacation days? I thought we were planning to do that later then take a vacation together._

**_Me:_ ** _I’m sorry, bro. I had to get out of the office._

**_Jonas:_ ** _what’s going on?_

**_Me:_ ** _Don’t tell our friends, but I poured my heart out to Even and he rejected me_

**_Jonas:_ ** _Ouch! Fuck him. He doesn’t deserve your time._

**_Me:_ ** _Thank you for saying that_

**_Jonas:_ ** _did he give a reason?_

**_Me:_ ** _you know how Even has bipolar? He thinks he’s not good enough for me because of that._

**_Jonas:_ ** _why wouldn’t he be good enough?_

**_Me:_ ** _because he doesn’t want me to spend most of our romantic relationship playing nursemaid. I happened to tell him about what happened to my mum after my parents’ divorce and now he thinks I could use one less mentally ill person in my life._

**_Jonas:_ ** _that’s fucking sad, man. I’m sorry you are all tangled up in tough shit like that. it was shitty of Even to reject you but I also get him somehow._

**_Me:_ ** _seriously?_

**_Jonas:_ ** _no one wants to burden other people and it is true that you’ were burdened enough in the past._

**_Me:_ ** _I never complained though. About Even I mean_

**_Jonas:_ ** _the thing is that he’s as convinced and determined as you are, so there can’t be a consensus. I hope you two figure it all out somehow considering you still work for him_

**_Me:_ ** _I will get it together. Eventually_

**_Jonas:_ ** _I also hope that you know Even cares deeply about you_

**_Me:_ ** _he fucking stomped on my heart_

**_Jonas:_ ** _because he cares enough to be cautious. I know it hurts but he just cares about your happiness. At least don’t lose sight of that. Hang in there. Love is pain sometimes but it’ll get better. Let me know if you need anything at all. I’m here for you_

**_Me:_ ** _make that transfer to Oslo happen. I miss you_

**_Jonas:_ ** _Working on it. I miss you too, bro_

*********

Just as I am about to get up and go to the bathroom, I hear a knock at my house door. 

I frown wondering who came all the way here without calling first. I go to open the door and there is young lady standing there with a huge bouquet of red and yellow roses. I blink at her in surprise while she smiles sweetly at me.

“Delivery for Isak Valtersen.”

“That’s me.”

“Sign here please.” She extends the POD for me to sign and I do just that. “Thanks. These are for you.” She goes on and hands the flowers to me. “Have a nice day.”

“Thanks.” I mutter, still bewildered. I retreat into my apartment and close the door with my foot while peering curiously at the flowers in my arms. I don’t know what’s going on yet but just the sight and smell of the freshly cut, neatly arranged flowers lifts my mood slightly.

I reach the couch and plop down on it and lean back as I search the bouquet for a note or something. It turns out there is. I pluck it off, open it and my heart staggers instantly, recognising Even’s handwriting.

The flowers are from him. I sit up so quickly it almost makes me dizzy. The note reads:

_Your love for me was never the problem and I’m so sorry I made it seem that way. I’m at fault because of my fear and cowardice. I’m sorry I didn’t trust you to stay beside me forever. Please forgive me?_

My heart starts beating so fast and it’s making my chest ache and my stomach sway a little as I read the note over and over again. Even has finally reached out to me and it’s to open up to me about his feelings. It feels so good knowing that Even is thinking about me too, that he is agonising as much as I am. It’s also great finally gaining some understanding of where his mind is at right now. At the same time this gesture has me reeling because the way he handled things left me so hurt and demeaned. This gesture is nice and all but it’s not going to cut it.

**********

Apparently 9 months of avoiding all unhealthy food doesn’t make the pizza in my hand taste any better though I’m having it for the first time in a long while. At this point I’ve accepted that it’s my misery making everything feel awful and boring. I can’t find anything interesting to watch on TV and scrolling through my IG for about 30 minutes straight hasn’t presented anything of value to me. While lying on my belly on the couch with my feet dangling over the armrest, I look up from my phone and catch sight of the flowers on my coffee table and I go back to thinking about Even for approximately a minute before a knock on my door interrupts me. Again.

I lift my head and give the door at affronted look. Who the hell could that be? I trust all my friends are at work at around 2pm in the afternoon so it can’t possibly be a surprise, utterly unwanted visit from Magnus. At the second knock, I groan and hesitantly get up, walking to the door.

It’s the same delivery girl standing there again, holding a gold gift box with a white bow on it.

“Hi, Isak. This for you.”

Another gift from Even, I ask myself?

I sign for it without fanfare and go back to my couch much like before to open my gift. This time my heart is racing just a bit from anticipation. I peel the top off the box and there is a single orange rose inside with a folded piece of paper attached to it. Naturally I start by reaching for the piece of paper.

It’s a drawing, two in particular. There is a line down the middle of the piece of paper and on one side a carton version of me is seated alone on my bed, leaning against the headboard and hugging my knees which are pulled up to my chest. On the other side I easily recognise the drawing as cartoon Even- thanks to the helpful coiffed hair on his head- and he’s seated alone at a work desk with shoulders hunched over.

Underneath the drawing there is a note which says:

_We are both lonely, it sucks, it’s my fault and I’m sorry. Please give me a chance to rebuild your trust and do better._

This one tugs harder at my heartstrings and I can’t deny the tiny betraying flutter in my chest.

*********

Exactly two hours later, the same delivery girl comes back with another single orange rose and 2 drawings attached to it.

The first drawing is labelled ‘ _in the universe where I messed up’_ and there is a drawing of both Even and I seated back-to-back on the floor. We seem very sad.

The second piece of paper is labelled; _‘meanwhile in another better universe where i can’t sing for shit but I’m serenading you because you deserve it and so much more’_ , and our cartoon versions are sitting on the floor again, next to each other this time. Even is playing the guitar for me and we are both smiling. We look so happy together.

The parallel universe thing is totally my thing. I’m surprised he is using it here. When I told him about it, he didn’t seem to be on board with the logic.

A small smile tugs at my lips, looking again at how happy we look in the universe where Even is singing to and playing the guitar for me.

********

By the fourth delivery at 5:30pm, I have to ask the nice girl what her name is she tells me she’s Cindy. This time she delivers another single rose-red this time and a note which reads:

_Thanks for always being my hero, for never letting go of my hand in the tough times and the good times; for loving me. I’m sorry for trying to run when everything felt too real for me. The truth is that you are the realest thing I’ll ever have in my life and there is nothing I won’t do to apologise for my mistake and make it up to you._

The tell-tale flutters I feel inside unfurl into full on butterflies in my belly, both thawing and soothing the sting in my heart a tad.

********

At 7pm Cindy returns with a big gift bag. I look inside to find an assortment of food contained in very neat tapper wear. My eyes are marginally wider in both disbelief and interest as I take out each bowl, each of which is labelled and again I recognise Even’s handwriting right away. There is prawn harissa spaghetti; spiced carrot and lentil soup; fresh salmon with Thai noodle salad; and chicken fattoush. I open each bowl with extra care to take a lungful and admire the contents.

The note attached to the rose reads:

_I know you are upset, but please don’t starve yourself. I made this food with extra care and I hope it’ll warm your stomach and heart as well. It’s all healthy, I promise._

I gape at the food once again, stunned that Even cooked it all. How on earth did he get the time to do all this? This must have taken a toll on him. He’s got so much on his plate right now. Is he staying up at night to draw and write notes for me? Totally driven by impulse from habit and anaware of what I’m doing, I find myself moving towards the living area to get my phone so that I can call Even to ask how he managed to cook so much food, to ask how he’s doing.

But I stop short of picking up my phone. What the hell am I thinking? I’m not ready to talk to Even just yet in this state where I’m only part touched by all the sweet gestures he has shown me today. There is a part of me still very afraid to trust him with my heart again after he crushed it last time.

Sighing heavily, I abandon the idea entirely- something that also weighs heavy on my chest because the truth is I miss Even crazily and I’d love to hear his voice right now.

Going back to the kitchen, I unfold the last piece of paper and of course it’s a drawing. Cartoon Even is cooking alone on the side labelled, _‘cooking alone sucks_.’

‘ _Meanwhile in a perfect universe where I’m brave enough to trust in your love for me_ , _cooking is that much sweeter for me with your company.’_ , is written above the other drawing which is of Even doing the cooking yet again but I’m the picture too this time, sitting on the kitchen counter next to him and smiling.

I spend a bit of time just looking at the drawing of Even and I in the kitchen together. I like that one a lot. Looking sadly at the food he made for me, I realise how much I like sharing meals with him and how much I miss that.

Even hates eating alone too. I feel so bad thinking of him all alone somewhere right now.

*********

Cindy makes what she announces as her final delivery for today at 8pm, and it’s a huge panda bear with _I’m sorry_ written across its belly. At this point Cindy is giving me a knowing little smile as she hands over the huge plush toy.

“I wish I had someone who apologises to me like this.”

I feel heat rise to my cheeks at her remark, but I just thank her and bid her goodnight.

Earlier I ate some of the delicious food Even sent and put the rest away in the fridge. Magnus texted me a little while ago to try and convince me to join him and Vilde for tacos and a walk at the park. I had to decline for obvious reasons. There isn’t much left for me to do for the rest of the night. I’ll probably just watch some movie on Netflix and hope it helps me sleep.

Now there is this huge bear in my arms to focus on. I think it smells like Even. Did he put his cologne on this? He did. An unceremonious chuckle escapes me at how ridiculous Even is being. I hug the bear and bury my nose in its neck. Smelling Even on it is oddly comforting.

The piece of paper on its arm has yet another drawing with universes on it. On one side of the line I’m lying in bed cuddled with the bear; and on the other side Even and I are cuddled up together on the bed.

For the first time since Stockholm, I smile with my teeth. I’d love nothing more than to cuddle in bed with Even.

I lift the bear and look at it, “looks like you are my cuddle buddy while I figure out what to do with the guy who sent you to me.”

I don’t particularly find sleep later when I’m in bed at 11pm but I feel warmer having my bear with me. 

********

The next day Even sends me a delightful egg salad for breakfast together with a bunch of red roses. By afternoon he’s sent me a lot of flowers with romantic little notes and drawings.

The highlight for me is the image of his cat which he sent me himself. The image is of Tulip wearing a piece of paper on her collar which says: _My human and I haven’t been good to you. Please give us a chance to treat you right._

That one has me laughing. Honest hearty laughter, something I haven’t done in what feels like forever.

God I really miss Even. He is the only person in the world who makes my heart dance with this much joy. Admittedly there hasn’t been much time to hurt today because he has kept me busy with all his romantic gestures. 

A little into the evening, another single red rose comes and as usual there is another drawing attached to it.

My heart stops when I realise it’s the scenario at the rooftop bar in Stockholm where I confessed my feelings. I swallow thickly feeling like my heart throbbing in my throat as I read the words above the drawing where cartoon Even and I are seated side by side.

My bubble says, _‘I love you.’_ And Even replies, _‘I can’t accept those feelings.’_

In the parallel universe scenario, I’m saying the same thing but Even’s answer is utterly different this time.

 _I love you too,_ he says. _I’ll love you more than you love me and I will never hurt you. I’ll always protect your heart._

My heart stops for a few seconds, and then comes to life again and starts to pound as it fills with so much warmth and love for someone who somehow can’t see how fucking lovable he is. He does love me and there was never any doubt. He was just afraid to admit it to himself and to me. That’s what he’s been trying to say to me through these notes and drawings.

I have a renewed conviction to show him how beautiful adorable he is even if it kills me. I feel like I might combust instantly if I don’t see Even right this second, so I pick up mu phone and dial his number.

There is no point in me suffering and hurting here by myself while Even does the same someplace else when we’ve established that we love each other. We should be together figuring this shit out. It’s time to talk face to face so that he tells me directly exactly what’s going on in that head of his.

********

Even is at my doorstep exactly an hour after I call to invite him over.

I’m holding the door open and looking at him while he stares nervously and anxiously at me. He’s still wearing his work clothes, so I assume he drove straight from the office to here. My heart flutters in the slightest knowing that Even rushed here to see me.

Whatever I’m about to ask gets stuck in my throat when I notice how ragged he looks. It’s not exactly like he looks plainly unkempt. In fact he looks pretty gracious in his charcoal grey suit, a matching trench coat and polished shoes. His hair is in place; he looks clean and smells good.

It just also happens that I can tell when something isn’t quite right with him. 

“Hi.” He gingerly offers me a tired smile, his voice low and hoarse

“Hi.”

I don’t know what to say or what move to make next, and it appears neither does Even, so we both stand awkwardly at the door for a little longer than necessary. 

This is the first time we are both so tense and guarded around each other and it’s so weird, especially because the loneliness and distress so clearly written in Even’s eyes is staring right at me and making me ache from the need to take him into my arms and comfort him. That’s matters more to me than whatever else I’m feeling right now.

That’s what pushes me to make the first step and reach for his hand, tugging on it to pull him into my apartment.

After I help him out of his coat and hang it on the rack in the entryway, we walk all the way to my small lounge area and then stand facing each other.

“I-I…” Even flounders, his gaze darting about awkwardly.

I step forward and reach up to cup his cheeks in the palms of my hands. They are so cold from the night air outside. His eyes are so open, revealing how cold he also feels inside. “Are you okay??”

He shakes his head. “No. Actually…” he trails off again

“Shh. You don’t have to say anything right now.” I quietly soothe then loop my arms around his neck and pull him into my arms. It’s as if that’s all the invitation Even has been waiting for since he got here. His arms wrap around me immediately and he holds me close, the way I wish he’d held me when I poured my heart out to him in Stockholm.

“I missed you so much.” he whispers to me

“I missed you too.”

“Please just… just keep holding me like this for a little while.”

My hold on him tightens instinctively because of the yearning in his voice. 

********

“Take a seat.” Isak offers me and I do just that. “Would you like some tea? That’s all I have.”

I small smile touches my lips as I shake my head then reach for his hand and pull him down to sit at his coffee table in front of me. We shuffle about a bit until we settle more comfortably with Isak’s legs nestled between mine, his knees touching mine. There is barely any leg room between the table and couch to accommodate our long limbs, but I like how closely we are seated. I need all the warmth I can get from Isak right now after feeling so cold for days.

I take his hands in mine. “It’s scary loving and needing someone so much that it feels like you can’t breathe without them.” I say without preamble, because I need to get all this heavy stuff off my chest before I lose my courage. I admit I handled things badly when you told me about your feelings. Instead I panicked and fucked everything up.”

Isak’s expression softens somewhat and a glimmer of hope comes alive in my chest. There is no trace of judgment or hatred anywhere in his eyes. After what I did, I expected to walk into his rancour here tonight but instead his eyes are full of warm understanding. I think my eyes are starting to tear up from emotion. “Why did you panic?” he asks gently

“When a good number of people wash their hands of you, you start to think it’s your fault. All my life, I thought the people who abandoned me did it because I was at fault somehow. My parents hated each other but they hated me more because I was a product of a union they both despised. I lost my friends because of a mistake I made.”

“Listen to me, Even. None of that was your fault. You didn’t ask to have bipolar. The issues that come with the condition are not your fault. As for your parents, they are just a pair of selfish people who got married and had a child who never asked to be born. You are a victim in all this crap.”

“Sometimes I find that hard to accept.”

“Then I’ll say it to you until you do believe and accept it.”

“So you’ll still have me?”

The corners of Isak’s mouth curve upwards in an indulgent smile as he slides his right hand out of mine and reaches out to hold my cheek. I lean into his touch and turn my face to press a kiss into his warm palm. “You can’t get rid of me. I’m not going anywhere, understand?” there is a serious quality to his tone and it comforts me so deeply. “I know you haven’t known true love in your life and I can’t promise that I’ll be perfect about giving you that, but I’d like to try.”

The tears I’ve been holding back for a few moments now finally come rolling down my cheeks and I lower my gaze bashfully. Isak is saying things way more beautiful than what I expected walking into this conversation, and my heart feels like it might split open because of how much I love and appreciate Isak.

Both his hands are on my cheeks now, tipping my chin back up and wiping my tears. “You are a good man, Even. My list of the reasons why I love you is endless. The only thing I loathe about you is that you don’t know how amazing you are as a person.”

“Is it too much trouble if I ask you to spend a considerable amount of time each day reminding me of how great I am?”

“No.” Isak shakes his head with a smile on his face. “I’m here for you but only if you don’t run.”

“No more running. I promise. I tried that and it sucked. These past 5 days without you have been hell for me. I missed you every second of the day. I missed your voice, your smile, your evil sense of humour, your touch, your smartass mouth…” I chuckle ruefully. “I didn’t know how good your love felt until I lost it. I felt lost and empty without you and I don’t ever want to feel that way.”

“You don’t have to. I’m here for you as long as you need me.” Keeping his hands on my cheeks, Isak leans into the small space between our faces and kisses me tenderly on the cheek then again at the corner of my mouth, lingering there for a few beats. My eyes flutter shut as more tears come rolling down my cheeks.

Indeed Isak has always stayed by me. I could have saved myself a week of anguish if I’d bothered to realise that Isak has never left my side despite how terribly flawed I am. Even now he opened his arms to me after I so recently broke his heart.

He has always put me and my happiness ahead of anything and I hated that at first because I felt like I was taking too much from Isak, but now I know that Isak is happy to give. He is happy to give me everything he can give.

I understand how that is possible because I want to do the same for him. I understand the feeling of loving someone so much that you would move mountains for them.

It’s scary as hell but there is no one I’d rather do this with than without Isak. We’ll love and sometimes fear and hurt but that’s okay as long as it’s forever.

Isak pulls back and I slowly open my eyes, “I do need you. I need every bit of you. I might die if you leave me. I’m insanely in love with you, Isak.” This is the first time I’m saying it out loud and it feels so liberating saying it fearlessly. 

Isak grins, leaning back in and brushing his nose against mine. “I’m wildly in love with you too, Even. Beyond sense, question or logic. Don’t question it so much either. Just feel.” He puts his lips on mine again and effectively cuts off anything else I’m about to say.

I tip my head to the side and open my mouth to let him deepen the kiss, and the moment his tongue touches mine, I feel like I can breathe again, I feel a renewed hope that the sun will shine tomorrow.

I reach out for Isak and pull him onto my lap, helping him settle until he is straddles my lap. His hands are at the sides of my neck, lovingly touching me there while my arms are wrapped around his waist to hold him close as he licks into my mouth like he’s been starving for the taste of my mouth. I throw out all inhibitions and lose myself in the sensation of Isak sucking on my tongue.

********

“Your couch is too small.” I comment. We are now lying on Isak’s couch and he is lying on his back while I’m lying beside him, half on him, with my arm thrown over his middle and my head resting on his chest.

“Stop it.”

“And very uncomfortable. There is barely any leg room for me.”

“Is there a couch long enough to fit your long ass legs?”

I feel the low rumble of his laughter in his chest against my cheek and it’s oddly soothing. “Would you be offended if I bought you a couch?”

“Yes.”

“Anonymously.”

“You just told me you plan to buy me a new couch, so I will know it’s you. plus I’m your assistant, so I know about your cash flow and purchases.”

“How then can I ever surprise and impress you?”

“Your creativity isn’t bad. I enjoyed your romantic displays throughout yesterday to today.”

I lift my head from his shoulder to look at him and I find him already peering down at me with a lopsided grin on his face. “Did you?”

I’m happy to see his eyes twinkling as he nods. I was afraid I’d never see that twinkle ever again after the way I treated him in Stockholm.

“It was all very cheesy but sweet too, so I’m not complaining. Don’t hold back from apologising to me like that in the future. You can throw in a trip to Hawaii just to drive your point across.”

I laugh at that, putting my head back down to continue nuzzling Isak’s neck. “You enjoy getting spoiled. I’ll keep that in mind.”

We fall into comfortable silence and my eyes start to feel heavy as Isak is slowly running his fingers through my hair.

“I read about our stock prices collapsing this week.” Isak suddenly says, keeping his voice quiet as if he’s afraid to disturb the serenity.

Of course I planned on talking to Isak about that eventually but now that we are so warm and comfortable and in love at this moment, I don’t want to discuss our work problems. I think Isak feels my reluctance and adds. “If you don’t tell me, I’ll just nag until you do.”

I let out a chuckle. “I have a feeling you’re not kidding.”

“I’m not.”

I let out a long suffering sigh. “The board held an emergency meeting after the stock price drop. My mother had to be in attendance, so she is in town.”

“Is she staying at your house?”

“No.”

Isak hums in thought. “Did you get a chance to talk to her at least?”

“We were scheduled to have lunch together but she stood me up.”

“I’m sorry she let you down again.”

“It’s okay. I kind of expected it.”

“You shouldn’t have to expect your flaky mother to bail on you. That’s messed up. You deserve better.”

“That’s nice of to say. Thank you.”

“And the board? What are they saying?”

“As you know the board says they only voted me in as CEO of the company out of loyalty to my father and I guess they thought I had potential to revive Golden Gates. Now my performance is way below par, so they are holding a meeting next week to vote me out. Jackson worked closely with my father, and he has a whole lot more experience than I do, so the board thinks he is a better option right now.”

Isak doesn’t reply immediately and the silence stretches for a little too long that I’m forced to look up. Isak is watching me with a peeved look on his face and a slight frown between his eyebrows. I can’t read the rest of his emotions exactly, but I’m certain there is no pity anywhere on his face and I thank heavens for that. “Thanks.” I murmur.

“For what?” he finally voices.

“Not pitying me.”

“I think you’ve heard, seen and received enough pity since you became CEO of a sinking ship. What I want to know is how you are taking all this. Are you okay?”

“No.” I confess

Isak kisses my hair and pats me gently on the back. “Don’t feel bad or blame yourself for anything. You did your best in a very tough situation while the option of just running away was open. Things don’t always work out even if we work hard, but at least you can say you tried. You’ll be okay. I promise.”

I’m so frustrated, exhausted and angry and I just want to cry, hate the world, blame my damned fate, runaway, but Isak is very right and honestly I also can’t bring myself to do any of that because I don’t want to live my life as a coward. I don’t want people to look upon me with pity and I no longer want the word struggle permanently attached to my life.

I have no idea what tomorrow holds for me but what I do know is that I want to keep doing my best while also enjoying my life. I want to visit the amusement park on random evenings to recline and enjoy a ride on the Ferris wheel like right now.

More importantly, I never ever want to lose sight of Isak and what he means to me. He might actually be the only person in the world that truly cares about my feelings, cares when I’m upset, and cares when I’m happy. I realise I care about Isak in the same way too.

One time when I was depleted from work, he took me to the amusement park in the middle of the work day to cheer me up. It was the most fun I’d had in a long time. We did everything I liked and ate so much candy that I got a stomach-ache and Isak took me home where he gave me some medicine and stayed with me until I felt better.

That moment still means so much to me and now I just want to do the same stuff for Isak.

Isak once told me to enjoy the little things in life and that’s what I’d like to try doing. I want to enjoy the so-called little joys of life with him. Like that evening after having dinner, I want to take a walk with him, look at the damn stars just because he likes it so much and then visit some coffeehouse to stuff our faces with sweet treats.

Isak unceremoniously bumps his shoulder against mine, pulling from my wayward thoughts. “What are you thinking about?” 

“Things I want to do with you.” I admit.

He offers me a quirky smile. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.” I lean up to brush my nose against his and kiss him on the lips. “stuff we can do as boyfriends.”

“You have no idea how good it is to hear you say we are boyfriends.”

“It feels good finally saying it.” _I can’t wait to call you my husband someday real soon._

********

Even is lying still and breathing steadily with is eyes closed, his head still on my shoulder. I think he’s fallen asleep. He’s a bit too heavy and I think my arm is falling asleep as well under the weight, but I’m not about to wake Even. He seems so exhausted and understandably so. He looks so boyish and cute like this, like there isn’t a single worry he has in the world. It makes me want to vanquish all the bothersome bullshit in his life so that he can enjoy peaceful sleep like this.

My phone suddenly rings, startling me, but my attention goes to Even, looking to make sure the sound hasn’t woken him. He doesn’t move an inch and once I’m satisfied that he’s still asleep; I reach for my phone which is lying atop the back of the couch. It’s an unknown number on the screen and wonder who it is.

“Hello?”

“Is this Isak Valtersen?” a lady whose voice I don’t recognise asks

“Yes?”

“Oh good. This is Liv Philips.”

Oh. Even’s mother. And apparently she already changed her last name to her new husband’s. I tense up immediately, feeling dismayed. What the hell does she want? I know I owe her my respect since I work for her and she’s my boss’ mother but at the moment I consider her more of a sorry excuse for a mother than a dependable employer to me.

“How can I help you?” I pour a healthy enough amount of politeness into my tone of voice.

“I can’t reach Even and he said to call him on his assistant’s phone if I can’t reach him directly.”

“I see.” I peer down at Even. Maybe it’s talking to his evil negligent mother that makes Even unexpectedly look so vulnerable and pitiful all of a sudden. His heart is so troubled right now and I know it’s super selfish of me to make this choice for him, yet I do it anyway because I can’t help shielding him from all manner of wicked things. “Even is unavailable right now. Can I take a message?”

Liv Philips makes a regretful noise on the line. “Alright then please let him know that he and I can have lunch together on Sunday. I trust he’ll be free to do so?” She asks and my last restraint snaps.

“I know it’s not my place to say this, but Even was really looking forward to meeting you for lunch before. Please don’t make promises until you’re certain you can keep them. Even deserves that much from you. He turned out great despite everything you’ve put him through and you not being in his life is more your loss than his.” 

There is a tense silence on the line and then, “You’re right; it’s not your place. You’re merely my son’s assistant. Have him call me when he can.” She tersely bites back and hangs up.

I have no regrets about telling her off.


	9. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FINAL CHAPTER!!!!! While i'm happy that I managed to finish this without any glitches, i'm also unexpectedly emotional about saying goodbye to the story. I wish i could make it longer but I've thoroughly run out of ideas.   
> Reading your comments and receiving your love and support has been a true blessing. i'll really miss connecting with everyone through this story. I hope i'll be back with something else soon so that we can connect again. 
> 
> There have been a lot of elements to Evak's love story in this fic, and I hope you'll all find this ending complete, satisfying and enjoyable. 
> 
> Till next time, much love to you all and please, please take good care of yourselves during this time<3<3<3<3

Even blinks his eyes open and stares at me morosely, not saying anything.

I smile sweetly at him and bring my hand up to touch his cheek and gently stroke this hair. “You are awake already?”

“I wasn’t exactly sleeping.”

My hand stills. “You heard me talking on the phone.” It’s a statement.

“You didn’t have to say all that to her.” Even sounds so sad saying that and that only upsets me more.

“I wanted to. Someone needs to.”

A corner of his mouth lifts into a small, soft smile. “You’re so nice standing up for me like that.”

“I wish there was more I could do.”

“It’s enough that you are here with me.” He nuzzles lovingly against my jaw, kissing me softly there.

“She wants to meet you for lunch this Sunday.”

“Alright but I don’t want to talk about my mother anymore.”

“What would you rather talk about?”

“Less talking and more kissing.” Even shifts his position until he is entirely lying on top of me and I part my legs slightly to allow him more room. He runs his hands down my arms until he finds my hands and interlaces our fingers then he brings our connected hands up to either side of my head and crashes our lips together in a hot kiss. This kiss is a lot more passionate than the one from a few moments ago, more desperate and hungry, and I don’t hold back from kissing back as reverently while my heart thunders in my chest.

I feel Even push his tongue lightly against my lips and I eagerly open my mouth a bit more, sighing when his tongue slides slowly against mine as we lick into each other’s mouths. I feel hot all over and the front of my sweat pants is getting tighter at an embarrassingly quick rate.

Even rolls his hips in a slow, lazy motion into mine, showing me that I’m not the only one who’s hard and burning. I lift my hips to grins our cocks harder together and moan, delirious with pleasure.

“We should move this to your bedroom, yes?” he whispers while mouthing down my check to suck hard on the tender skin on my throat.

“Or we could rip our clothes off each other right here. Beatrice is taking up most of the space on my bed anyway.”

Beatrice?” Even asks, not stealing his movements in the slightest

“My new panda plushie.”

He chuckles. “You named it? So it’s a girl huh.”

“It’s a boy.”

“A boy named Beatrice?”

“I was miserable when I got him, okay. Don’t judge me.”

Even finally lifts his head and looks down at me, taking my face gently in his hands, then he kisses me on the lips with more tenderness than searing desire. “I’d really like to apologise to you for that. Do you think boy Beatrice will mind moving side so that I can make love to his owner?”

“If he doesn’t move I’ll kick him off the bed myself.” I smirk and Even mirrors my expression.

*********

I’m alone in bed when I wake up the next morning, thoroughly exhausted but also sore in all the right places. Memories of last night flood my mind, putting a smile on my face. Is it Eva or Noora who said Even looks like a great lover in bed? I can’t remember who said it but they were right. I spend longer than necessary hugging and sniffing the pillow Even slept on last night.

The only thing wrong with this picture is that I’m waking up alone a-fucking-gain just like that morning in Stockholm. I need to talk to Even about that.

In the meantime I take my time stretching my tired limbs and then slowly get out of bed to freshen up. On the way to my bathroom, I see Beatrice on the floor by my bed and I got to pick him up, giving him a kiss on the cheek. “Sorry you slept on the floor, sweetheart. Dad needed to get laid.” I give him another kiss and then put him on my bed.

The smell of food hits me the moment I step out of my bedroom all freshened up and in a pair of fresh sweat pants and a t-shirt.

I follow the smell all the way to the kitchen and indeed Even is there in front of the stove, cooking. He’s also spotting an apron I’ve never seen before. What’s more, he has on a pair of my black sweat pants and one of my favourite white t-shirts which Eskild gifted me years ago. Both are visibly a little too small for Even’s long limbs but that doesn’t take away from how alluring he looks standing in my kitchen cooking.

One side of my lips tips up in a small surprised smile. “Good morning.” I announce my entrance into the room while walking towards Even.

Even turns towards me and smiles like my appearance has just made his day. I could get used to Even treating me like the centre of his world. “Good morning.” He replies and opens his arms, which I step into then they close around me as I snake my own arms around Even’s waist.

“I hate waking up alone.” I tell him right away just to get it out of the way.

Even’s eyebrows shoot up like that’s the last thing he expected to hear, and then his face rearranges into an apologetic smile. “I’m sorry. I wanted to make you some breakfast.”

“That’s nice but I’d rather wake up in your arms.”

“You don’t seem like the type to be a needy boyfriend.”

“I am. Congratulations on acquiring a boyfriend who loves cuddles and kisses in the morning.” I grin wolfishly and unapologetically

“I think there is appeal to this side of you.” Even says with mirth twinkling in his blue eyes. I can’t believe this beautiful blue-eyed man with the world’s cutest dimples is all _mine_ now.

I think he can tell what I’m thinking, because suddenly he’s smiling and smirking at me, and then he leans down and kisses me. I sigh against Even’s lips, tilting my chin up, opening my mouth a little more, and he slides his tongue into my mouth.

I can definitely get used to Even gently kissing me like this, holding me close to his body like I’m so treasurable I’d there is nowhere else he’d rather be than here kissing me. I forgot how good it feels to be desired and cared for like this. I feel all warm and happy all over. I tighten my arms around Even and press against him until every part of me can feel him as I deepen the kiss some more.

We stand in the centre of the kitchen for a while, kissing unhurriedly, our breakfast forgotten.

When we break apart, Even puts his hands on either side of my face, gently cupping my cheeks and sliding his nose against mine. “How did you sleep?” he asks in the tiny space between our lips.

“Good.” I nod confidently, and gosh it feels great to feel this well rested and cherished. “Was my bed comfortable for you?”

“Yeah. I slept well.” Even kisses my forehead. “I’m making breakfast.” He steps out of my arms and takes my hand, pulling me towards the stove.

My mouth goes slack at all the cheese toast, ham and eggs he’s made. “How did you make all this? I don’t think I have cheese or ham in this apartment.” I point at his apron. “I don’t have one of those either.”

“I went out to buy some stuff. You fridge was completely empty and that’s no way to live. While I’m here, I’m going to feed you and nourish that underfed body of yours.”

“That’s sweet but all this looks too greasy for me.” I give Even an apologetic smile.

Even raises an eyebrow at me and then shakes his head. “At least try it, please?” he beseeches.

While I’m still considering the request, there is already a spoon full of eggs in front of my mouth. I tentatively open my mouth for Even to feed me and I chew very slowly, trying not to think of all the grease in the fried eggs.

My taste buds unexpectedly come alive at the taste, surprising me completely and I look at Even with askance. “This tastes different? What did you put in them?”

“That’s a secret. If I tell you, you won’t eat it.”

“So it’s something unhealthy.”

Even laughs and gives me a quick kiss on the lips. “I’m not telling.” He goes to grab two plates for us and I find myself marvelling at how homely he looks, already acquainted with my kitchen.

When he comes back to the stove to serve up the food, I move to stand behind him and wrap my arms around his middle, resting my cheek on his back. “I like having you here.” I tell him

“In that case you’ll eat the breakfast I lovingly made for you?”

I grumble but nod anyway. “Okay.”

He takes my hands from where they are clasped about his belly, brings them to his lips and kisses them. “Thank you.”

“No, thank you.” I press a kiss against his back.

*********

After breakfast we go back to bed to lie down curled up and just talk. Even tells me more about the meeting he had with the board.

I turn around in his arms to face him, “do you want to continue on as CEO?” I ask him candidly.

“I don’t know. There is a whole side of me that’s tired of Golden Gates. Maybe different scenery will do me some good.”

“Progress has been hard to come by over there but I think you are the right guy for the job. I’d like you to stay.”

“For the first time, I’m going to disagree with you on this one.”

“Whatever you decide, I’m on your side.”

“That’s all I need.” Even touches my cheek and kisses my forehead. I bury my head in his chest and promptly fall asleep without any trouble.

********

This time Even is there, still holding me when I wake up. He is fast asleep, breathing steadily and peacefully. I smile contentedly at how blissful it feels finally waking up in Even’s arms. Careful not to wake hi, I slide my arm from around his waist and bring my hand up to caress his smooth cheek. My thumb lingers on his plump, slightly parted lips and I’m reminded of how good these lips make me feel. Even looks so relaxed and somehow younger than usual. Maybe it’s because he is resting, a thing he rarely gets the chance to do. Suddenly I understand why Even isn’t 100% sure about keeping his position at Golden Gates. His job has stolen a lot from him, including most of his joy and youthfulness. 

I don’t know what the right choice is for him but I’ll support whatever choice gives him some peace and true fulfilment.

********

The next time I wake up, there is a note on the bed next to me and it reads: _sorry for leaving you alone again. I have some business phone calls to make. Love you_

Sighing with a tiny smile on my face, I put the note aside and get up. As I’m walking swinging my feet to the floor, I spot a piece of paper and pen on the chair by the window. I’m sure those aren’t mine. With a slight frown of curiosity on my face, I walk the few steps to the chair to pick the paper up and look at it.

A blush spreads across my cheeks instantly the moment I lay my eyes on the sketch. It’s the famous sketch of rose wearing only the heart of the ocean, except my face is on it this time. It’s very roughly done in pen, but it’s clear enough for me to see. Did he do this while I was sleeping? I thought I was sleeping too.

_Oh God. I’m dating the cheesiest guy in the world._

********

There is some music softly playing when I walk into my lounge area and Even is sitting on the couch talking on the phone. He smiles when he sees me. I wait till he is gets off the phone then I hold the sketch out for him to see. “Explain.”

Even grins and stands up, walking up to me. “You were sleeping in that exact position and I couldn’t resist.” He leans down and gives my lips a peck.

“What on earth is your obsession with Titanic or Romeo and Juliet? Everyone dies in the end.”

“That doesn’t take anything away from the beauty and purity of the romance.”

I shake my head, grinning at him. “What am I going to do with your cheesy ass?”

“Love me for a really long time?”

“I think that’s doable.” I’m about to say more but I’m cut off when Marvin Gaye’s ‘ _sexual healing_ ’ starts playing on my stereo, and I gape at Even because the music playing is coming from his phone.

He just smirks and opens his arms invitingly. “Come here, baby.”

“Even, I’m not dancing to that stupid song about sexual thirst.”

Even shakes his head in defiance and continues smiling and waiting for me to step into his arms. To make matters worse, he starts mouthing along to the lyrics.

An involuntary chuckle slips past my lips and quickly turns into a full blown laugh. Even takes the opportunity to step forward and gather me in his arms.

********

I settle on my couch and lift my legs into lotus position. I lean forward to grab the laptop from the coffee table and I put it on my legs. Even and I are supposed to work on a speech for his meeting with the board on Monday. Since he isn’t sure whether he wants keep his position or not, we have two speeches to prepare: one that’s supposed to persuade the board to give him another chance and one to say goodbye. We have to be ready for anything.

Even comes back from the kitchen with two steaming cups of cocoa and puts them down on the table before sitting down next to me. His arms reach out to pull me against his body. I nestle closer into his side as his head nestles into the crook of my shoulder.

“Thanks for the cocoa.” I tell him and lean in to kiss his lips.

“Do we have to work? I’d rather ravish you.”

I gently elbow Even in his gut but That gets a smile out of Isak, a small grin slowly curving itself onto his lips, the corners of his eyes crinkling.. “Stop being ravenous and insatiable.”

“It took me years to see you for what you really mean to me, because I was busy trying to be the hero at Golden Gates.” Even whispers, unexpectedly serious. He holds my left cheek in the palm of his free hand and I tip my head slightly to the side, leaning into his touch. “I don’t want to waste any more time fighting a lost battle. I just want to spend all my time loving you.” 

My heart squeezes in the best way possible. “I love you too.” I kiss Even again, for a little longer this time. “But we have to prepare for the meeting.”

Even sighs in a resigned manner. “Okay but you are mine the rest of the weekend and I don’t want to hear anything about work. There is a crisis at the office but I begged Jackson to fill in for me so that I could have this time alone with you.”

“In that case let’s compose these speeches quickly then I’m all yours.”

*******

“What’s all this?” I marvel at the amount of food laid out on my small island. While I was finishing up with the speeches around 1pm, Even stepped out to order lunch for us.

“I ordered everything we like. we have pizza, fried chicken, burgers and all other unhealthy crap I could think of. There is also an array of extra healthy stuff for you. All your favorites.”

I turn towards Even and give him a big grateful peck on the lips. “You are truly the man of my dreams.”

A very pleased very wolfish smirk slowly spreads across Even’s face and that’s when I realise what I just said. He crowds in on me and takes me into his arms, leaning in until the tips of our noses are touching. “Just repeat that. I’m what now?”

I can feel heat rising to my cheeks and I momentarily lower my gaze, shy all of a sudden. Even is still staring intently at me and waiting for an answer when I look back up. He raises his eyebrows at me in encouragement. “You are the man of my dreams.” I repeat in a marginally lower tone of voice. Embarrassment threatens to consume me the moment those words leave my mouth, but Even doesn’t let that happen because he’s kissing me hard on the lips. It’s hot, wet and almost all tongue, imbued with feral desire.

Thoughts of the things I now know he can do with his tongue easily flood to my mind and my hands curl around his shirt at his sides as I moan against his lips.

Even pulls back way too soon, leaving me wanting more. “Don’t say things like that or we’ll go back to your room and never come out of there.”

I grin at him and he grins back, giving me a final peck on the lips. He turns his attention back to our food and goes to stand by the island, explaining. “I thought you might not be in the mood to cook.”

“If you value your life, never let me cook for you.” 

“We could cook together some time though. That would be so romantic.”

“Yeah, that’s not going to happen.” I firmly refuse

“It could be fun.”

“Not for me. I’m too lazy. We are not doing it. Moving on.”

Even tips his head to the side, eyeing me with amusement dancing in his eyes.

“Can I ever get my way with you?”

“There is definitely a chance. Keep trying.” I grin and he mirrors my expression.

“This is a lot, but it all looks and smells divine.” before I can stop myself. I’m reaching for a chicken nugget and putting it in my mouth. My eyes involuntarily close as the flavours burst on my tongue.

When I reopen my eyes, I find Even watching me with a smile and I crimson. “Sorry. I haven’t even washed my hands. My manners seem to have left me.”

“It’s okay.” he waves it off. I can tell he is genuinely unfazed and I’m relieved. I want this date to go perfectly. “Since you are so eager, we can eat right away.” Even invites and I don’t oppose. “Are you still watching your weight?”

“Yes. I’ll look like a large baby if I gain weight.”

“Are you that afraid of looking cute?”

“I prefer to look manly.”

“You can look any way you want to. At this point I’m too far gone for you to turn back because of something like that.”

I instantly lower my gaze to hide the huge smile on my face, but I think my efforts to hide it have gone in vain.

It’s a long way until I can learn to be comfortable with my cute looks, but a sure as hell feels great to hear Even say those words. “Let’s dig in.” I mutter. “Maybe I’ll eat just one piece of fried chicken.”

So we take seats on either side of the kitchen island and dig in while trading stories about anything that comes to mind. Even and I have eaten together and talked like this many times before but never is a domestic setting like this, never with both Even and I wearing sweatpants and T-shirts and unkempt hair. 

This works too. It’s fun and comfortable and wonderful. At the end of our meal, we open a bottle of wine Even apparently bought this morning. It’s on the expensive, rich and delicious side I note. I’ve never been one to care too much about the finer things of life, but I’m definitely not complaining about sipping expensive wine at home with my man. 

********

I let out a long drawn sigh while patting my belly. “I think I ate too much.”

“Me too.” Even replies. “I’m ready to go take a cat nap.”

“Speaking of cats, how is Tulip doing with her new sitter?”

“They are both doing great, which is an advantage for us because we can have weekend getaways every once in a while.” He winks at me, all eager. For a second I get lost in how lovely his blue eyes are.

“That’s true. Remind me to thank her for helping you with that series of apologies. I think Tulip’s was my favourite.”

Even grins nice and wide in a while that turns his eyes into half-moons and just melts my heart. Suddenly he gets up and announces that it’s time to do the dishes and I wrinkle my nose in revulsion. 

“Not having to wash the dishes is the reason why I eat out. The chore fucking sucks.” I gripe much to his amusement.

“You could wipe the surfaces then.”

I scowl. “How is that better?”

“It’s not. You are cute being a big baby and all, but the sooner you get up and get the work, the sooner we finish up. You can’t get out of this one.”

I make a huge show of grumbling and sulking dramatically, but eventually drag myself up to help. I attempt to half ass everything, but only end up getting laughed at and gently scolded.

Just as I’m getting so close to successfully making short cuts, he catches me somehow and shakes his head like I’m being so ridiculous. 

“How the hell did you notice that I didn’t wipe the cups dry? Do you have eyes at the back and sides of your head or what?” I complain, just a tad bit miffed.

Even laughs and it’s enough to melt my irritation away. Rolling my eyes, I find myself smiling too and this time I try to behave myself and do as I’m told.

It’s not that bad of an experience I suppose. After all I get to stand close to Even and enjoy the proximity. What’s more, he’s pausing every once in a while to reward me with kisses.

********

“Should we watch some TV?” Isak asks me after lunch. He sits down on the couch next to me and rests his head on my shoulder while holding the TV remote in his hand.

“Might you have any Leonardo DiCaprio movies here with you?” mostly I’m just teasing.

Isak tips his head to peer at me with a dirty look on his face, one that I find very amusing. “No.” he says irritably and I laugh, wrapping my arm around him and to pull him closer to my side.

“That’s a shame.” I kiss his hair and let my nose linger there because I like the feel of the curls against my face. “What should we watch then?”

“Anything where someone doesn’t die in the end.” Isak sasses, which is a sharp contrast to how cute and needy he is being lifting his feet onto the couch and nestling closer against my side.

“Can we drink coffee while we watch? I’ve always wanted to watch TV and drink coffee in the afternoon with someone I love.”

Isak peers at me again, wearing a soft smile this time. “You are so cheesy.” He leans up and kisses my jaw. “I’d love to do that with you, but I doubt there is coffee in this house.”

“You need to take better care of yourself. Go grocery shopping.” I can’t resist the urge to scold Isak for taking such poor care of himself. I know coffee isn’t exactly at the top of the healthy food list, but it’s something. Isak’s fridge and cabinets wee scarily empty when I opened them this morning. I travel for business a lot and I have tons of events to attend weekly, making it impossible for me for go home for days on end but my life is somehow more put together than Isak’s. how is that?

“I want to but I can’t cook.” He whines like it’s so unfair that I’m admonishing him. He sounds just pitiful enough to tag on my heartstrings but I refuse to let up.

“You still need to have food in your house. You could look up recipes online, buy the ingredients then try to make a dish. You can’t eat out all the time.”

He lets out a long suffering sigh but I think my point has also sunk in. “You are right, I’ll get my act together.”

“Good.” I smile, satisfied. “The good news is that you now have a hot boyfriend to take better care of you.”

Just like that Isak is back to smiling brightly. “I like the sound of that very much.”

I kiss his hair again. “I’ll go make that coffee.”

“Again, I don’t have that.”

“I bought some when I went out this morning. Beer too.”

“You really are the best boyfriend in the world.”

I really like hearing Isak say that.

********

“Did you call your mom back?” Isak asks me in the evening while we are soaking up together in his bathtub which is nearly uncomfortably small for two people. I was going to mention it earlier when we got in but after I complained about Isak’s lumpy couch and later his broken microwave, I fear he might curse at me if I add his bathtub to that list of things I want to throw out of Isak’s apartment.

I’m starting to wish Isak worked for a company that offers better pay for EAs.

The first 20 minutes or so of sitting together in the tub were a bit uncomfortable but we soon realised that our sitting positions were all wrong. It’s a lot better now that Isak is sitting between my legs, facing away from me and lying on my chest while my arms are looped around his waist.

Of course that’s enhanced by Isak’s excellent selection of bath salts and body washes, and the glasses of wine beside us. Personally I feel it could be better with music playing but Isak has banned me from playing any music after what he’s now calling _the sexual healing incident_.

This talk about my mother is threatening to disturb the serenity of this moment, so with the hope of getting it out of the way, “Yes. We agreed to have lunch together tomorrow.” I summarise and fall back into silence.

Thankfully Isak doesn’t press me for details of the conversation I had with my mother. I press a kiss against the wet hair stuck to his temple and we resume our silent relaxation.

********

My mother suggests she’ll pick me up from Isak’s place so that we use the long drive to the restaurant of her choice to really talk. _‘You said you have a few things to get off your chest, so we should drive to the restaurant together and talk?’_ she says to me over the phone about an hour before she shows up at Isak’s place around 12pm in her sleek car.

“Are you doing okay?” she asks once I’ve joined her in the back seat of her car and the driver has set the car in motion.

“Not really, no.”

“I know things are tough right now at Golden Gates, but it’ll all blow over in no time.”

“By then I might not be CEO.”

“Don’t sell yourself short. Some of the board members still believe in you. I believe in you too.”

“Do you really, mum?”

She looks at me like that’s a ridiculous question to ask. “of course I do.”

“Why?”

“What kind of question is that? I’m your mother.”

“I’m just wondering, how you have so much confidence in me when you don’t know me?”

At first she is silent, just staring at me, and I can tell she is searching her mind for an answer to that one. I know this is a tough question for her and that’s why I’m asking it. “Well…” she starts with a shrug. “Our profit margin at the company isn’t good, but you’ve been able to keep the company just afloat enough so that it doesn’t completely crumble to the ground. Plus you did great work for your company in Manhattan.”

“Anything else apart from what’s on my resume?” 

“I know you are also very passionate about reviving the company.”

My gaze flickers to my hands which are clasped on my lap. “I’ve never been passionate about the company, mum.”

“What?” the shocked sound of her voice makes me look at her, and she does indeed look very surprised.

“I only came back because I thought I’d get a chance to work closely with you. I thought you and I could finally be a family. I didn’t realise you had plans to move away the moment you were pronounced chairlady of the company as the major shareholder.”

She purses her lips and lowers her gaze for a few moments before looking back up. “I was miserable with your father. I know it seemed cold of me to run off and marry someone else but I had to find my happiness after your father stole it from me for so long.”

“What about me? Don’t you think I was robbed of happiness too?”

“I thought you wanted the company. I thought you were happy here.”

“I want my mother.”

“Even…honey… Wilson and I have been talking and we are going to move to Canada. He has a young daughter and we’d like to give her a sense of family, so we are going to live together.”

My jaw drops upon scandalised scoff. “What about me?” I ask incredulously. “Don’t you want to get involved in anything I do?”

“A least you are a grown man. I’ll come and visit whenever I can.”

I don’t know how many times she’s said that to me and maybe it doesn’t hurt as much because this I know and have come to _accept_ the fact that she’s lying and she’ll never really care about me. It would be nice to hear her nag me once, to embarrass me in public like only a parent can, and to set me up on dates with people she thinks suit me best.

I’d like her to meet Isak and get better acquainted with him because he is the man I love.

None of that will happen and I guess it’s okay. I know now that I’ loved and I’m not alone. The people who want to appreciate me already do without me having to beg. This is the first time in my life that my mother is shoving me aside and I’m not crying about it. Somehow I feel liberated knowing that the tiny ounce of hope I’ve had that mother will one day mother me, is useless.

“I’m leaving Golden Gates.” I tell my mother and just as I notice that she’s about to argue, I go on. “The place was never my dream. I have wasted enough time trying to do my part as your son and dad’s. Just like you, I deserve to find my happiness too. I’ll transfer my shares to you.”

“Even, please…” she trails off visibly upset gobsmacked. “You don’t have to do things this way.”

“I hope you’ll be happier in Canada. You have my phone number for whenever you remember that you have a son back in Norway.” With that I politely ask the drive to pull over so that I can get out.

********

Even looks a lot better than I expect when he returns to my place. If I didn’t know better, I’d say he looks just fine, but I do know better. Looking closely enough, I can tell how broken he is from how hollow his eyes are. 

“You are back sooner than I thought.” I try to force a smile despite how heavy hearted I’m feeling as well as I pull him towards the couch to sit down with me.

“We never made it to lunch.”

“How come?”

“I decided now to force my mother to do things she doesn’t want to. I know she doesn’t really want to have a meal with me.” Even explains, his voice quiet and flat.

The pain in Even’s eyes shreds my heart to pieces. “What really happened?” I reach out to take Even’s hands into mine.

“My mother is moving to Canada with her husband and new daughter. They want to settle there as a family.”

My jaw drops in shock. “What about you?” I demand disbelievingly.

“I’m a grown man. That’s what she said.”

“Does growing up mean you no longer need love and support?”

“Apparently.” Even smiles while I continue to scowl. “Hey, it’s okay. I’m okay.” He softly reassures me and that somehow angers me more.

“You shouldn’t be okay with that. It’s not fair.”

“There is no point in being sad about it. My mum has made her choice and she won’t change her mind.”

I shake my head and look Even square in the eye. “I’m sorry that you don’t have a lot of people telling you how much you are worth. I know you’ve lost a lot but that doesn’t mean anything is wrong with you. No one I know comes close to how beautiful your heart is, how talented you are and what an amazing person you are.”

I don’t know what Even wants to say but I don’t let his words come out because I wrap my arms around his neck and kiss him softly on the lips, murmuring against his lips, “I love you. I love you so much. I know it’s hard for you to believe but I won’t leave you. You won’t ever have to feel alone again. Please trust me.” I plead

“I do trust you.” Even whispers shakily. “You’ve never left me I my toughest times.”

“And you will always have me in the coming sad, scary, tough and happy days to come. I know you have my back too and that’s what this is all about. We are in it all together. I mean it.”

Even nods vehemently and kisses me so lovingly. I melt completely inside, pulling Even closer yet because I know he really needs to be held.

We don’t pull apart until we are breathless and at this point Even tells me that he has made the decision to leave Golden Gates.

“Are you sure that’s what you want?” I ask gently.

“I joined for the wrong reasons anyway. I don’t think I ever had the right amount of passion in the first place. Perhaps it’s time to let someone with real desire to save the company take over. I told my mother I would transfer my shares to her.”

“So you want no part of it at all?”

Even shakes his head and then regards me nervously like he’s worried I might not support his decision. “You don’t need my permission or approval, Even. I trust you to make the right choices for your life. I’m behind you whatever you decide. If walking away from your father’s company is what you want then that’s fine by me.”

Even smiles while nibbling on bottom lip. “Have I mentioned how amazing you are yourself?”

“Yes, but I don’t mind hearing it again once in a while.” I smile and Even smiles back. Gosh it’s so good to see him smile. “I know you are still disappointed that lunch with your mum didn’t work out today either. Is there anything I can do to cheer you up?”

“Right now I’d like to go to bed with you and sleep for a while.”

“We can do that. Can I take you out somewhere after? Tomorrow is a big day for you. Let’s go have some fun tonight to forget about work stuff.”

“I know tomorrow is your last day off work, but could you go with me to the meeting?”

“We are in this together, remember? Of course I’ll go with you.”

*********

“You are a free man now. How does it feel?” Isak asks me back in my office after the meeting. I’m swinging casually in my chair while he’s perched at the edge of my desk in front of me.

I chew on the question a little bit before answering. “Honestly I’m relieved.”

“A lot of people are sad about losing you.”

“Are they?”

Isak nods. “Vilde made a post in the company forum about you stepping down and it’s now flooded with talk of disappointed the workers are that you’re leaving.”

“I thought they hated me.”

“They all have opinions of how you could do this or that a little better, but they don’t hate you.”

“I can only hope that Jackson will be a better fit.”

“Is he really the board’s choice?”

“Yes. They’ll hold a meeting in a week’s time to vote in him. Meanwhile I’ll spend this week handing over and packing out. I’ll probably have to attend my own farewell party by the end of the week too.”

“So Jackson will be my boss now huh.”

“Probably not. Realistically speaking I think Jackson will want to continue with the assistant he has now. You might be assigned to someone else. I’ll write a great recommendation for you.”

“I’ll miss working for you.”

My chest strangely squeezes when Isak says that. If I’m being true to myself, I’ll miss working with him too. The time I’ve spent here has been hell for the most part but Isak helped me make some good memories here too. He is my man now so he is not going away or anything nevertheless I’ll always treasure the working relationship we built here because it’s through it that we fell in love.

“I’ll miss spending every moment with you too. Everything will be different now that I’ll pursue other projects.”

“Such as?”

“Since I’ve gained a little experience from reviving dilapidated businesses, I’m looking into the business of buying small struggling companies them revamping and reselling them. This is something I’ve been thinking about for a while and I’ve discussed it a few times with my wealth manager and my lawyer. Both of them say it’s doable as long I start slow. I could start with one company and see how that goes.”

“That’s good advice.”

I sit up and reach for Isak then pull him into my lap, looping my arms around his middle and resting my chin upon his shoulder. “What do _you_ think?”

“I think you’ve earned the right to do what makes you happy, to try new things and spend your money any way you please.”

“Do you fancy a businessman boyfriend?”

“As long as you have time for me, I’m fine with whatever makes you happy.”

“I’ll be good to you. I promise.” I punctuate that with a kiss on his cheek.

“I know you will.” Isak shifts until he can look more directly at me. With a serious and meaningful gaze, he says. “I know how good of a man you are and I’m incredibly proud of you no matter what you decide to do with your life going forward. I just want you to finally be happy.” 

Hearing Isak say that to me is so rejuvenating. It makes me feel so full of new hopes, new dreams, renewed courage, like I’m being reborn. Most importantly, I feel so full of love for him and finally confident in the love he has for me. “You are a big part of that happiness and I look forward to doing all things I’ve wanted to do for you but couldn’t because it was inappropriate for me as your boss.”

“Things like what?”

“If I tell you now I can’t surprise you later. Just wait and see.”

From the side of Isak’s face, I can see his very pleased smile and it warms my heart. “If you are talking about buying me a couch, I will hurt you. I can buy my own damned couch.”

“Then buy one already.” I chuckle. “Will you accept a car though?”

“A car.” Isak exclaims incredulously.

“You can’t ride around in mine and I hate to think of my boyfriend riding the tram to and from work. Actually I’ve hated that idea from the very beginning. I thought about buying you a car back then but of course that was too weird considering our relationship.”

“A car is too big a gift.”

“Think of it as your generous boyfriend spoiling you. I remember you saying you like gifts. I’m not even talking about some exaggerated and pompous sports car. Just something reasonable to make your life a little easier. I’ll feel better that way.”

Isak cranes his neck to look at me with a soft smile on his face. “I had no idea you cared that much about my wellbeing all along.”

“Of course I did and now I’d like to be an ever caring boyfriend that buys you a car because you need it.”

“Since you put it so nicely, I’ll accept the car if I get to choose the brand I like?”

“Sure.”

We’ve been dating for 3 days and you are already outshining my exes.” Isak clicks his tongue and shakes his head.

“Is that a bad thing?”

“No. I hate all my exes.”

“That’s probably one of my favourite things about you. I love you so much.”

Isak shakes with laughter and he turns his face towards me again to kiss me on the lips. “I love you too.” He kisses me again, pouring a so much reverence into it that I’m left blushing like the idiot in love I am.

“Let’s go on a vacation after my freeware party. I want you to myself before work takes you away from me again.”

“Nothing can take you away from me.” He gently reassures me. “But a vacation does sound enticing.”

“I’m still your boss for this week. You might want to use that to your advantage and apply for leave. I believe you still have tones of a vacation days.”

“Jonas will kill me if I make use of all of them.”

I snort indignantly. “I’m not too fond of asking your best friend to lend me some of your time, but I’ll do it if that’s what it takes. It’s safe to say we’ve both earned ourselves some vacation time to clear our heads and get regroup for future projects.”

“I agree. Hawaii?”

“Let’s do it.” we seal the deal with another kiss.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading. let me know what you think in the comment section. if not, just pressing the kudos button is is also deeply appreciated support<3<3<3


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